Would you have an objection to a lesbian aupair?

[mishmash]

Just curious

I don't think it is "moral" in any sense of the term to remain a virgin until marriage. I think it is just very misguided.

May I ask why the preference Anna?

why misguided?

Why the (not huge) preference for a heterosexual au pair?

Because our children are heterosexual, and I think that any child carer ought to be as relevant a human role model as possible to the children.

My partner's brother was homosexual, and he could have done with a homosexual role model / mentor in his (sadly short) life

Misguided because I think exploring one's sexuality is crucial before one decides on a life partner

I am interested in how you can be so certain about your DCs sexuality Anna ...

For my part I really am not keen on our aupair bringing people back when we are not here. Not for any reason of prudery (I hope though subliminally that might be part of it of course) but because I don't know them.

I am very careful about the people I introduce to my children and the people I introduce into the house. How do I know that they aren't going to do something terribly clever with the computers and nick all our cash? Or worse still nick our children?

Unless your au pair is the only role model for your child, in which case you have bigger problems IMO, I can't see the harm with throwing a little diversity into the mix. In fact, I can see some benefit.

Isn't your dd 3?

Because of their love lives Quattro... how else?

TheFallenMadonna - like I said, it's not a huge deal. My daughter's "godfather" is homosexual and he is a fantastic role model.

Another thread, I've completely missed....
I wouldn't have a problem at all with a lesbian AP or a homosexual AP. In fact we hired a boy last summer who in his words his sexuality was "uncertain" in mine he was very gay. That didn't bother me,...he was a crap AP... that did!
I do agree with ST, I don't want AP's picking up casual partners and bringing them back to my home. For all the obvious reasons and also I take my role of in loco parentis quite seriously and try to give the same advice as I would my own dc. (don't shag on a 1st date, always use a condom etc etc)
Once a partner becomes established then it's totally fine for them to stay, once we've met them, so pretty much what an AP would expect from their own parents. Recently I had an AP who wanted a bloke she'd met on FB to stay the weekend. I refused, she'd never actually met him, she had no idea (and neither did I) of whether he was someone I'd want in my home in front of my children. She wasn't happy, but when I asked her if her parents would allow it, she said of course not...

ffs these threads are so wrong.

Dotty, so sorry you have to read such shit - why oh why are lesbians frowned upon in this day and age? Its LIFE, and anyone who wants to think any different should keep their head stuck in the sand so that they dont stumble upon reality.

droopy have you read this thread?

Yes I have - why do you ask?

Because almost nobody has said that they would mind. The unanimous consensus here is that nobody would mind.

Other issues such as whether or not au pair should have partners over etc etc etc are predominantly what's being discussed really. So the thread isn't even about being a lesbian, it's about everybody having a slightly different position on how much of their au pair's sex life they're happy to be aware of, condone under their children's roof ....

FFS why would anyone object to a lesbian aupair? Who cares what her sexual preference is as long as she does a bloody good job at looking after your kids.

The title of it made me angry - it obviously is an issue to even begin a thread about it. I mean, would anyone even consider starting a thread asking if they thought it was ok to have a straight au pair?

Why do people even have to think/ask if it is ok - what difference does it make to anything?

I guess some one asked it droopy because what is acceptable in your home is different to what is acceptable in the outside world.
I personally don't have a problem with sexuality or race but I wouldn't accept an AP with very strong religious views particularly of a none orthodox religion (i.e scientology, mormon etc). Dh and I are atheists and have very happily employed a wonderful muslim CM, but what I'm prepared to deal with on a day to day basis in my home/refuge/castle is a different matter.

but why? If they didnt force your children to have the same views what does it matter?

Or do some people think that it isnt acceptable to have a lesbian in their home?

Because this is my home, my refuge that I work extremely hard for and because I think to create a harmonious place it's usually a good idea to try and find a good match in terms of views, attitudes etc. The same also goes for an AP.
Surely that's not so hard to understand... Ok..so we both would happily employ a lesbian ÅP,...would you have a homophobic AP in your home?

good reply ingles2. And it's a matter of personality as well.

I do not know if I would 'have a lesbian in my home' as of course there must be nice and nasty lesbians. It's too ingenious question, droopytits.

I also work bloody hard for my home. To be honest no I wouldnt be happy to allow a homophobic AP in my house but the reason is because I wouldnt be happy to let anyone with such strong views on anything that isnt their 'norm' be around me or my dc.

I certainly wouldnt say to anyone with strong religious views that they were not welcome in my home - what makes my views any different to their views and beliefs?! As long as they respect mine and vice versa what the hell does it matter?

Exactly droopy,...I wouldn't have a homophobic AP either or a racist one for that matter.
Your home is the one place where it's acceptable for you to say what is "the norm" surely.
(and I didn't say anyone with a different religious view is not welcome in my home, but that the extreme religions are not something I'd choose to live with every day)

No of course not

I don't see why an au pair's sexuality would be relevant

Having a rule about not bringing partners into the house or having overnight guests, or seeing partners while caring for the children would be fine and perfectly reasonable imo though.

ah ok ingles, I kind of agree with you then