Black men protesting BLM but exclusively dating white women

[LillyFlower1984]

I’m always confused about black men or men of colour in the media and RL who shout racism/BLM and so on yet when you look at their lifestyle they are married to white women. When you go on to find out more they only ever have dated/married white women.... what are people’s take on this?

@LillyFlower1984

Fascinating how this thread has turned.... I started it hoping for honest views from black people but yet the amount of infiltration from non-black detailing the thread is shocking.

This was supposed to be our safe space! MN is predominantly white website with lots of traffic through the most popular boards yet when you look at the rest of BMN not much in the way of posts except this thread.

Once again this discussion for me was targeted at at black community. I was not really interested in the countless white/non-black women who flocked here to tell us how it should be based on their relationship to a black man.

I do get your point, but realistically people in interracial relationships are going to respond when they feel people are criticising them.

Fair enough if I could I would rename the thread as

“BLM: can we truly support this ideology if we exclusively date out of our race”

I think the fact that “black men”and “white women” is in the thread title has drawn people in 🤷🏾‍♀️

@Sugarintheplum

IMO flipping racism around never works.

You'd have to somehow load onto it 400 years of oppression including the stealing of land, lives, sex trafficking, abduction, imprisonment, rape, pillage, starvation, brutality, political silencing etc.

Also, the scenario in your example is real life. That is the beauty industry, so meh. We probably wouldn't be.

You also called black women elephants.... I personally love elephants, wonderful matriarchal creatures. So many characteristics I admire and wish I could manifest in my life. I don't think you meant it that way, though.

That's what I always think. White pride and black pride are not the same. Black pride is done to uplift a group of people who have been oppressed, white pride is for the purpose to sustain white supremacy and keep that group of people oppressed. A white woman made a video on YouTube explaining this perfectly.

Yes slavery was a long time ago but the damage of it are still shown on the generation today all throughout the world, Africa included. The benefit of slavery are still shown on the descendants of slave owners today. You hear every other day of how a white person have inherited our ancestor's money from their grandparents. These money get passed from generation to generation. They also dont have any issue boasting about how their ancestors were heros and conquerers. More money=equals less stress, that comes with a lot of other benefits as well; better parenting, better education etc...

It's not a good look when black people scream racism at an attempt to try and be "fair" or loved by other races. It will only be even if black people did all the above to white people, and they havent! It will only be fair if other races of people stood up for you and defended you against their own people. They may do that online because their image is hidden but a lot of them would not defend you against their own race in real life. If they do defend us then rightly so, that is the least compensation we deserve for the damage that's been done to our people. Stay on code or keep your mouth shut! Stop calling your own race racist for defending your honour. Find something else to be offended about black person, there are many! My comment is not it. This is how I see it.

@LillyFlower1984 That will bring up a whole lot of other issues as to why black women date outside their race. A lot of the time it is because they have noone to pair up with in the black community. The typical black man either date only white or light skinned. That should be pretty obvious by now.

She called black women elephants but is defending a european standard of beauty(thigh gap).
Is this really a black woman. Maybe I should have worded my sentence better, I think thigh gaps look better on men and animals since it is more of a Male and animal physical trait to have large thigh gap. Of coarse animals have larger thigh gaps than men. I dont find large thigh gap attractive on women of any race. If you have it that's great. I'm just saying it is not a beauty standard to me.

The typical black man either date only white or light skinned. That should be pretty obvious by now.

That hasn’t been what I’ve seen or experienced. Of course, we will have different experiences as black women on this. I noticed it was more that some of the black men I encountered didn’t want a partnership of equals, they wanted black women who would jump and say how high and had one rule for themselves and different ones for me. They envied my successes vs celebrating them. I celebrated theirs yet they couldn’t celebrate mine. They wanted an obedient black woman who will nod and smile, cook and clean for them, agree with them on everything and worship them because they deserve to be treated like a man, like a king. They wanted maids not queens. Yea, I was not going to do that nor would I tolerate or be with a man of any race that wanted that from me.

LillyFlower1984

Misogynoir isn't aimed at non-Black women. So your Post is nothing to do with them. However I think because they can't get past being mentioned as an example of BLM hypocritical men dating non-Black, they can't help centering themselves.

I was not really interested in the countless white/non-black women who flocked here to tell us how it should be based on their relationship to a black man

Probably to derail thread/some kind of mission to shut down BMN. I bet they didn't put as much if any effort into defending the Black Woman who experienced so much race hate on MN, that this board was created.

They should be ignored.

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Hi Mumsnet

Read the overall thread and strongly believe black brothers who strictly date white and other races but disrespect their own have not experienced enough of their 'rich' culture, or been exposed and educated on how to love their black sisters unconditionally. We have sons and they have travelled to Caribbean, Africa and seen how beautiful the continents/countries are and how we are a big melting pot (melanin). I see a lot of Black British men who solely date white and have been accustomed to this, but they only see what media promotes is beauty (skinny, straight hair, pale/light skin) we need to educate our young black sons to embrace and be proud of our rich culture, in order to unite we need to build and encourage our own FIRST just like other cultures who "stick to their own" not saying you cant help who you fall in love with, but dissing black women (your mother too) is a common trend now but this isn't the way forward! We should be embracing our strong independent Sisters and be proud of our uniqueness. You can support BLM but remember some wont take you serious if you predominantly date white and disrespect your own TOGETHER WE STAND, DIVIDED WE FALL PROUD TO BE BLACK, ONE LOVE