on the 1st day of christmas my true love sent to me a moosy and a baby

[tinkerbellstinkerbells]

new thread ladies

morning

very exciting cant

we did great @ sale made £200

have just bought dd1 -

cabing bed,duvet,pillows,side table,x2 vertbaudet sheets, my mum is buying 2 duvet sets

very exciting

having a quiet day today

hello to everyone else

and @ sale only spent £7 bought dd1 a helmet for when she gets a bike in the summer and dd2 a wetsuit for her swimming lessons

Ooh, DH has taken DS to do food shopping and DD is having her nap - fell asleep in her cot with me sitting in chair next to her (yay!), so I'm supposed to be cleaning and tidying, but I find myself on here instead

All this talk of ttcing! I'm now going through my week of thinking, no - this is it, we'll stick at 2. Mostly because at 10.5 months DD is still not sleeping anywhere near through the night, although last night we were at least back to the 1 wake during the night, which is much more bearable. Am just not sure I could convince DH of another and I would need to be sure myself first, so am postponing all thought of it until we have completed the half marathon and see how I feel then.

Kayz - fwiw DS is the same about hair washing and he has short hair. He used to be just fine about baths and hair washing, then at about 2.6 he got ill and we stopped the bath every night routine. Then he started just screaming every time we tried to wash his hair. Now he has baths 2x a week (although recently he has just decided he likes getting in the bath with DD some evenings anyway - which is fine now I can manage both on my own, but I do have to get DD out before he can have his bubbles as she's not allowed bubbles) and we only wash his hair once a week. A shampoo shield does help and giving him the sponge to hold, as what he really hates is water going anywhere near his eyes or ears (the latter being the harder to avoid). I have to say, we got DS' hair cut really short when he was about 22 months because we were having a real problem getting rid of nits and ever since we did, it has gone much coarser and now the curls are so small it actually just sticks up on end on top, so we have to keep it short. Am gutted he has lost his lovely curls, so think twice before you cut DS1's hair! Totaly sympathies to you on the bathing situation though. You would have thought we were torturing DS the way he used to create! My friend's DS is the same - used to love baths and now hates them, so think it's just a phase they go through!

Hope it's just a blip with your Dad's eyes too.

MMM - sorry for your DS' dad. Sounds like he is just afraid to lose face with his friends and then too embarrassed to talk to you about it, hence trying to pretend he's done nothing wrong. Totally agree with the others that they always say DaDa first. If I recall correctly, Mama even came after something else with DS!

Diege - another night away - . Hope you get done what you need to.

LG&T - I am in awe of you with your brood. Part of what puts me off having another is that I just don't think I could be a good enough Mum to more than 2 and this is my failing, not that I think that others can't be good Mums to more children.

Right, the cleaning and tidying won't do itself (wanders off into dreamland where it does...)

Just been checking when my library books need to go back online. Apparently the potty training one I got out yesterday needed to be back on Friday. So will have to go and sort that out.

Star, DS1 throws himself around in the bath. He falls over and stands up. It is really terrifying just trying to stop him from drowning himself.

he does say mama but not very often, more when hes tired than upset. he seems to want his grandad lots too as hes a real daddys and grandads boy. but luckily he will see both grandads today.
im meant to be doing the tidyin around whilst ds is playing so i get to 'rest' when hes at his dads, but doesnt seem to be getting done. DS does say a few words quite often such as DaDa, Grandad, Gone, GoGoGo, and 'ia' then when tired or wants my attention for cuddles comes the MaMa

morning- just listed some more bits and bobs on ebay... hopefully will be some more pennies towards the dining room floor, and DH worked out last night that he's on track for a pretty good bonus so far, with about 5 weeks left of the period- so fingers crossed we can have the dining room all sorted by easter time!! wuhoo!!

DD2 had me up from 5.15am again today... she's getting bad at early wakings and not going back off, at 5.15 i fed her, then at 5.30 i fed her again on the other side- she'd drained both sides and was still screaming. tried teething gell but nope, no such luck, so by 5.45 i was downstairs feeding her porridge, then she drained a 4oz bottle of cows milk, at 7ish she was looking tired again so put her to bed, she was asleep in 2 mins with no fuss... but i was left unable to get back off to sleep... it'll hit me around 2pm- tit normally does!! Little monster!! Thinking i'm gonna have to start getting up earlier with her to feed her and change her etc, then get her a nap after the school run maybe.

Right DH is off and he's been entertaining DS & DD1 with ben 10 comic making while i've been on here... DD2 is happily squealing away to them all from her bouncer!! Best go and play mummy... then i think we're taking the kids to the local park & gardens to ride their bikes around for a bit...

Hello

MMM, M's dad sound's like he could do with a big dose of reality. It must be really difficult going it alone.

Kay, glad it doesn't sound too bad with your Dad, alway's worrying when the old folks general check up's go wrong. And don't talk to me about library books, DS1 had to extend his books online twice before we finally got round to taking them back, the day before they were due AGAIN! I have stopped him getting them out now unless he needs some texts books for homework (though 9/10 the internet is enough) if/when he run's out of books to read at home then he can start borrowing them again.

Tink, wow! You did really well - well done you! Bet DD1 is pleased as punch with her new things

Hello everyone else

Well, the talk, didn't happen. I'd spent all day yesterday really trying to be honest with myself and trying to put the MC out of my head, and TBH I always come back to that I want a baby, but I don't want anymore children, I don't want to be pregnant again, and I think another 4+ years of being a SAHM might just send me even more crazy. So, as much as I think when ever someone is pregnant/had a new baby/TTC talking, I will always feel a bit of the green eyed monster sitting there in the background, I have come to realise that we are complete as a family, there is no missing gap to fill (was a big thing for me through both of the MC's) there is nothing missing, and I am going to carry on enjoying the boys, and looking forward to getting out in the big wide world in 2 or 3 years time and actually have a go at playing a grown up.

We've got so much going on this year as it is, at some point the move, starting the diploma, DH really isn't happy at work, so if the right job came up I can see a big change for him as well, the kids seem to be growing up around us and we're just not noticing, think it is time for some serious life changing decisions to be made, and a pregnancy/new baby would put most, if not all of that on hold.

So, I am keeping the right to change my mind, and am sure I'll have times when that broodiness takes over for a little while but I think it really is for the best to just live for a while.

Phew, that was all a bit heavy, need a brew now, is it too early for wine?!

DH has reverted to being a grumpy old twat. I am really struggling in this relationship and I don't know what to do anymore.

Aw Kay, it's a stressfull time, the kids (no matter how angelic, always a stress), you not liking your job, his job, erm... MIL ishoos.

Have you talked to him?

I have tried and he gets up every morning and says he will be nice to us and within about 30 minutes he is being nasty again.

Just feeling pretty fed up now. I seriously hope it's just his lack of job.

What do you mean by being nasty? If it is anything like what I'm thinking you know the drill. If it is just general nit-picking/moaning then if he keeps falling into it almost by habit, then could he be depressed? Would he go for counciling, either alone, or with you, or both?

If it's down to work, if he found a job tomorrow would that solve all of the problems?

My sister is a recruitment consultant, my mum hasn't had anyone to foster since just after xmas (i.e. not a penny coming in, not even any benefits), even my sister cant find mum a job - any job, there is just nothing out there. BIL is a departmental manager at Tesco and he says they are getting somewhere between 15-20 job aplications a day, and there is no jobs at all, it is a nightmare at the moment (feeling it from DH's side aswell, if he had any option he'd be out of where he is quicker than you can say p45).

Would it help if you had some time alone together? Or maybe even apart? I don't mean split up, just a day or two's break.

It's really silly things. Like if DS1 doesn't answer a question quick enough DH shouts at him. At the minute it's if DS1 doesn't use his potty and does wee/poo in his nappy. Which really bugs me as it just doesn't help with potty training.

He has had counselloring last year and he had 8 sessions and his counsellor put it down to stress. But he was like this at school too. He was always losing his temper until he moved out. His mum treated him just like he treats DS1.

I'm not sure him getting a job tomorrow would change that much TBH. I think he would be a bit better but he wouldn't completely stop.

I don't think we'll be having a 3rd DC ever.

hi everyone, been to see ma mum n dad today with DS and he was really happy he hasnt seen them for a week and half as they been away.
Ye it is hard at times doing it alone but im used to it now, and gotta get through it for DS's sake and i have my family and his famil here to help if i need it.
KAYS - that doesnt seem to good about DH, is he out of work? or jus not liking it?

cheers nat - dd1 cant wait for bed etc to arrive on friday

kay - my dh gets stresses he swore @ dd1 earlier

He is out of work. He is looking and applying for jobs but nothing is coming of it yet. I really hope once he is back in work things will calm down. I've worked non stop since I was 16 except for my mat leave with the boys so I don't know what it is like to be out of work. But I imagine that it's not nice.

ye i guess it isnt nice for him, as hes not used to being home all the time, hes used to being busy and away from home, you and the boys. ( not in a bad way ) but maybe hes being at home too much for what hes used to? and this could be triggering the 'nasty' behaviour?

Kay, is he even aware? I ask becasue the problems DH and I had last year, it was mainly (probably due to our age difference and the fact that he took me from adolensence to adulthood - or mostly! ) that he was acting like a father rather than a husband, he wasn't aware at all, and neither was I really, but then I slowly started realising over a number of months and then it hit crisis point. I wonder if he does just need a bit of a wake up call, DH had the shock of his life, and he has done anything and everything to change certain things, and to make sure that we both don't return to bad habits, and it's worked, we're stronger than ever, happier than ever, and I'm not for one minute saying we never have a cross word, but whereas I used to think "I want to do x, but DH won't like it, I don't even want to raise the subject" now it isn't asking permission, it's more "Unless you can explain to me why I shouldn't do x, I'm going to do on Saturday..." Not in so many words but DYKWIM?

But, whatever is going on to make your DH behave in such ways, he really shouldn't take it out on the kids, or you, and you shouldn't let him. I think you know you need to do something. Make him help himself, it is the only way it will last, if he doesn't want to help himself then whatever he thinks he can change will end up creeping back in.

Tink, Oh no, sorry, DS2 drawing on the stairs... will be back, maybe tomorrow, g'night xxx

I think you are right MMM. He said that it was fun for the first week but now it is getting to him. I just hope he gets one of the jobs he has applied for.

well i have my fingers crossed at least one of them is a success for him. and hope it all stops sooner rather than later.

right well now that DS is fast asleep im going to get a relaxing bubble bath and read some of my book, and then may put a film on, but will decide after the bath . will be back on at some point tonight, jus dont know hwen haha.

Morning- I think this is the earliest i've been on before- DD2 has had me up since 5am again .... i'm so tired and low on energy- Dh is off too, but he was at football late last night so feel bad asking him to get up with her today- but think he's doing it tomorrow.

DD2 is getting much less satisfied with my milk... it just doesn't seem to fill her enough any more- and she seems to be self-weaning.... but i dont want her to, i wanna keep feeding her another few months... i'm really upset at the prospect of having to face the facts and start giving her cows milk in a bottle or cup... She seems to use me for when she's thirsty and not for hunger, as in she can guzzle away everything i have and can make for her, will completely drain me of every last drop... then will scream till she either gets food or a bottle of milk...

oh cant - it is always hard to make these decisions!!

kay - hopefully your dh will find something !!

taking bracken to swimmming lesson soon

Morning all,

well after 2 weeks or more of C waking 6-10 times a night we have finally had 2 good nights. Our central heating thermistat has broken and the only way to get the heating on is to set it to max. We have been letting the house get up to 20/21 degrees then switching the heating off when we go to bed so it doesn't get too cold at night. That's warmer than we usually have the room and both nights C has slept from 8-5 with just one feed in between. It feels great! I just hope it continues! It is really too hot for Kelvin and I though so we might have to put her in her own room (I know it's a bit warmer than recommended for a baby room but I'm sure she'll be fine). It would be fab if she would sleep past 5am but for now I'm just happy to get some sleep.

LOL at the 'waiting to ttc' list. I have a feeling some of those dates will move . Right now I can't imagine how I could manage with 2 never mind 3, 4 or 5 but I'm sure that will change in a few months.

Cant - sorry for early waking. Fingers crossed DH gets all the bonuses he can start crossing things off your list of bits to do before ttcing! Sorry DD seems to be self-weaning but you've done brilliantly feeding her until now and given her a great start. You'll be a fab feeding advisor.

Max - sorry M's dad is being so crap . Hope you enjoyed your relaxing bubble bath .

Kayz - I know it's annoying but I think it's tougher than we realise when they are out of work. My dad drove my mum crazy when he was made redundant and he was only out of work for 2 weeks and DP was a miserable whinge when he was waiting to find out if he was being made redundant. It's still rubbish for you to live with it but I think you have to take a deep breath and hope DH finds something soon. Do talk to him though - maybe if he gets in to a routine of taking DSs for a long walk to the park every day it would help. You both get some time, DSs can run off some energy and I usually find getting out and being a bit active boosts your mood.

Oh I can hear DD stirring. That was a crap catch up but I'll be back later.

hi rugby

dd2s room is 21-22 sure that is fine

glad u have had better sleep

we enjoyed swimming it is freezing here!!

ended up havin a nice relaxing bath and gettin an early night needed that sleep i think. as feel fresh today but in a lazy mood lol. hope everyone is ok.