July 2020 - thread 2

[RedRobin7]

New thread for our July gang 😊

Shall we do a little reminder of who we all are so we can see who is on here - Age, current EDD and if we know our 12 week scan date?

I'll start:

31 - EDD 08/07 - 12 week scan 24/12

That was in reply to @LisaxMarie xx

@LisaxMarie I had a plan of a water birth and it all went out the window and ended up in labour for three days with a forceps and an episiotomy and two blood transfusions. Literally just do what you have to do to get baby here safe. Never thought my birth would go that way and it was horrible at the time. It's taken a lot for me to even think about having another but hoping I can have a Csection next just as I'm not sure I can do it naturally again. Xx

Thank you ladies! I think I’ll just go with the flow and ensure I’ve done some research then. I’ll aim for a water birth be open to whatever comes our way. Thanks for the advice. Really appreciate it x

Age 30
2nd pregnancy & child
Due 10/07/20

Already had 2 nhs early scans due to bad pain and bleeding and everything very luckily was fine!

12 week scan on 23/12 but will actually only be 11+3 when it happens.

Please may I join too?

Age 47
Due date 04.07.19
Two other children, both boys aged 8 and almost 11
Due to my age had Harmony test last week at FMC and awaiting nervously results which I’ll hopefully get before Xmas.

That should of course be 04.07.20 - doh!

@dragonmummy17 good luck for your scans. I think if you’re feeling this sick you’ll be all good. Rubbish that it’s the same time of year

And agree 100% with @Kiki275 on birth plans, my friends who had fantasised their ‘perfect birth’ generally had harder experiences as it always went differently to what they wanted. I was very open minded (had an epidural in the end thank GOD) and I think you need to be open to it going whichever way.

We moved to the Netherlands this year, and the home birth % is really high here, the government even send a birthing kit to your house on the assumption that you’ll give birth at home ! I’m too much of a coward but have huge admiration for anyone who wants to go for it.

Thanks for the new thread.

I'm 36, second baby, 9 weeks today, due 18th July. First scan on the 7th Jan. I've just had my booking in appointment today, all very straightforward though crazy fatigue and bad sleeping meant I had to ask the midwife the same questions multiple times 🤦‍♀️

Have had 3 scans already (due to concerns about a possible ectopic and then the foetus measuring small). The last scan showed it was still measuring small but there had been steady growth since the last scan so fingers crossed!

Re. birth plans, absolutely keep an open mind and do your research and have an idea of what you want but be prepared for all eventualities. I really wanted a natural water birth which went out the window when my DS was measuring large and I was to be induced though went in to labour naturally on the day of, and then a whole crazy labour experience ending in forceps delivery. So things don't always go to plan, and I think being prepared for things to not go the way you intended is probably the best advice I can think of!

Hi all, I'm 33, first baby, due 6/7. 12 week scan on Thursday, so happy to have finally made it to that golden week! Think I'm finally starting to feel a bit less tired, and other than sore boobs and occasional hunger nausea I'm feeling okay

36
EDD 19th July, scan 7th Jan
3rd pregnancy, 1st ended with MMC in Nov 2017. I have 1 year old DS 💙

I'm returning to work this week after mat leave and have my booking in appointment too. Going to be an interesting back to work discussion with my boss!

I've been nauseaus since around 4 weeks but no vom yet!

@Sprintfinish wow what a conversation to have with your boss! How are you expecting it to go?

I'm dreading telling work even though this is my first mat leave with this employer as I haven't been there that long. My role is very female dominated so on most teams, there is usually at least one person away on mat leave, usually more. However, it's not the case at all where I'm currently working and most of my colleagues don't have children. I'm doing it this week all being well with next scan.

Oh man the nausea and sickness is starting to drive me insane - anyone else? I'm 11 weeks and I'd hoped it might be tailing off by now but it's ramping up if anything. Constant all day nausea plus actually being sick once or twice a day. So unlike with my other two! Was sicker earlier on with them but by 12weeks the nausea had pretty much gone! Know it's a good sign that all is well but absolutely dreading Christmas and all the food prep!

Hi all, as from the first thread I’m a husband who is on here because the wife doesn’t really do Internet forums etc. and I’m trying to learn so I can be a support throughout.

We are 36, first pregnancy, EDD 08/07 and have our first NHS scan booked for 7th Jan - which puts us very close to 14 weeks at the time. Bit concerning that, given that a private scan last week showed we were measuring three days ahead of where we thought.

We had a scare last week when the wife’s symptoms disappeared altogether but everything appeared fine in the scan we booked as a result of that scare. The nausea has returned a little, but either she’s getting used to it or it’s not as strong as before. Unfortunately she has gone off pretty much all healthy food and only ever seems to want fast food!

Hope everyone else is doing well :)

Hi Autumn - congratulations- just wanted to say I wouldn’t worry about the baby being a few days ahead - The Sonograper will go on the date of your wife’s last cycle and I’m not an exact science as that does not allow for late / early ovulation or an irregular cycle. Obviously if the size was massively out by a few weeks it might be concerning but a few days either way is usually no sign for concern. The fact you saw a baby and presumably a heart beat is a very very good sign and the chance of miscarriage after seeing this reduces dramatically. Symptoms often fluctuate and things like morning sickness can be influenced by tiredness so please try not to worry!

Hi!

I’m 35
2nd pregnancy - I have a 3 yo son.
DD 19th July.
Scan booked for 9th Jan.

Feeling soooo tired I’m in bed right now.

@Sprintfinish The same thing happened with my friend, she got pregnant whilst on mat leave - her employer was fine but did say they'd never had it happen before and needed to look into it! She went back to work for one week before starting her second mat leave, which she's on now and just found out she's accidentally pregnant again!!

@AutumnDazed I wouldn't worry either. I'm 10+4 today and other than feeling more tired than usual and bloated a lot, I don't really have many symptoms. I've also been struggling to eat as healthy as I normally do and I've gone off certain things such as spinach and broccoli. I'm also too tired in the evenings to be spending ages cooking from scratch like I normally do. I think at this stage just eating something is important. I also snack on fruit, unsalted nuts and drink a glass of milk a day.

Ladies (and gent 😉) I need some advice - I've not had an easy journey... two miscarriages (one at 12 weeks), depression, marriage issues around it all, struggles at work also due to it all... now that I'm pregnant again and this time it seems to be working out, I feel so much happier and I can't wait to announce that we're having a baby. I'm also surprised how on board my husband is with it all. My scan is on Xmas eve so, all being well, we'd like to announce on Xmas day. I have been speaking to a friend of mine who has fertility issues and failed IVF attempts. I told her I don't want to upset her or another friend and that I can hide my Facebook post from them both. She said she's going to avoid Facebook on Xmas day anyway but that she doesn't think it's a good day to do it as it's the hardest day for people struggling. I know that - I've spent many Christmas times wishing I was pregnant and knowing that I have children missing but I feel we deserve to announce it. I don't have many Facebook friends, just over 100 and most are family who already have their children. So I think it's the easiest way to tell the extended family, friends and my colleagues. Am I being selfish? I have already said I won't be posting pregnancy / bump updates throughout because I know how insensitive it is.

@AutumnDazed i have gone off lots of food and all i crave is fast food too! Especially chicken selects from mcdonalds and sweet and sour sauce! I was told at work i should get a loyalty card :)

Hi @RedRobin7, thanks for the message above. We are in the same position re announcing out to friends and family - one of our close friends split with her husband after 3 years of failing to conceive and we are looking to announce it sensitively, but our friends and family are very spread too and Facebook seems the best way to do so. You aren’t being selfish, this is your news to tell people and FB is a platform that provides you the opportunity to spread the news far and wide. It’s tough trying to ensure you don’t upset someone, but you’d hope if they were real friends they’d be happy for you first and foremost, even if it does bring up a painful memory/feeling for themselves.

@susie12345 Haha! My wife, who rarely eats beef, is obsessing over the McDonald’s hamburger, which at something like 89p can’t be the best produced burger ever but every time she gets one she smiles like the Grinch (I mean that in a nice way :))

@misselphaba I'm hoping it'll go OK! At least I'll be back for 7 months before going off again.... It does make it easier going back to work and leaving DS at nursery knowing it's temporary.

@RedRobin7 you tell the world your news!! After my MMC I unfollowed people with kids briefly so I could still handle social media. People have ways of coping if they're struggling to conceive.

I'm right there with the nausea gang.... Which is crazy because I barely had it with my son, and this time I have been getting worse since 9 weeks, to the extent that I'm barely able to eat a meal without vomiting now. Praying this goes away in the next couple of weeks and it isn't becoming hyperemesis

Also, on the note about birth and labour... I definitely support equipping yourself with as much knowledge as possible! I wanted the natural water birth, but ended up with induction at 42wks with gas and air. It was intense but honestly fine, so no horror stories here. Research all the options to help you feel more in control during labour, and minimise fear by understanding what's happening! That worked for me at least Also... Breathing techniques to get you through the contractions!! At their worst I was having to get to 13 seconds before the contraction peaked and started to ease. Gas and air was essential!

Hey all. I am 37, second pregnancy (first was MMC at 9 weeks), EDD 12 July. Scan 6th Jan.

Because we did IVF we had an early scan already and saw a heartbeat.

I have hyperemesis so have been totally stuck in bed for over a month, am on 3 different anti sickness drugs, have lost a stone and am now underweight, and been in A&E 3 times so far.

It feels like one struggle after another. Cannot wait to feel better.

@Redrobin7 your friends will want to be happy about your news but they will be mourning their own inability to still have their family, if you wanted to you could tell them before you publicly announce which gives them a heads up and they can be prepared and also absorb the news privately

I know personally that everyone’s news as much as you are happy for your friends is a knife in your heart and if they are anything like me they will cry and need time to get their composure and although your news is to be shared with excitement your friendship will be stronger for that compassion you show them

I literally unfollowed people and withdrew which makes me so sad as I’d lost friends along the way but those I have kept took the time to be patient with me as they know my sorrow and welcomed me when I could deal with it

Age 34
EDD 28th july
No date for 12 week scan yet

Have got booking appointment on friday and going to have a private scan next weekend.

Was getting a bit worried as all symptoms seemed to have gone at the end of the week and after a hectic couple of weeks at work I was starting to worry things might be going wrong, now the nausea and tiredness has really hit me this weekend, ive also had period like cramps this evening, not sure whether to be worried by that or if I just need to relax 😬

@RedRobin7 instead of Facebook could you use a different tool such as WhatsApp or FBmessenger? That way you can update groups of people selectively? I kept my 1st pregnancy off FB entirely and will likely do the same again x