Due May 2007 - Thread for w/c 20 November

[charleymouse]

Morning ladies
Hope you are all keeping well. Just thought I would start this weeks thread (I am still catching up with you guys from last weeks).
TPT today and I have dared to measure I am 12+6 weeks and currently meaasure 9.5 sheets. I can't imagine how big I am going to get with two in there.
Anyway I have decided to go for the Nuchal scan and have the last apt on Friday afternoon. HOpefully hti swill all go okay and nothing else to worry about, if I come back as high risk I think I will go for further testing (that's todays plan anyway - subject to hormonal changes )

I will endeavour to catch up with all your news later but just a quickie - DH was helped out of his cot when a baby by his big sis who accidentally (cough cough) dropped hime down the stairs. He broke his knee and still has occasional trouble with it now, so not overprotective at all to get checked out. Sensible in my mind

Cheers Have a godd TPT.

Creena, my mother's mother used to behave that way with my mum. She kind of "grew out of it" when my mum stopped entertaining it. They didn't talk much for years, but get on ok now. I suppose the unfortunate thing is that it's not YOUR mother, so not really your decision. I hope your DH can be strong with her and not take any more crap. As JL said, it sounds like attention seeking. That's exactly what it was with my gran.

MKG - I really feel for you. My DH is really not very interested in getting to know anyone in my family except my dad. He detests my stepdad more than I do (and that's saying something) so things with my mum are awkwards as she feels the vibes. Anyway, when I tried to ask him how he'd feel if I shut his family out, or how THEY'd feel, he pretty much said that HE was the one that was important to them not me. I hit the roof and since this was on top of other problems we were having, I laid down the law.
I wrote out for him three very short paragraphs on "The Things I Expect". It was about respect for me and my family, respect for my time (over him never telling me he'd be late home or consulting over plans etc) and about helping me.

It really hit home becuase I kept it concise and to the point with no emotional baggage. He keeps the bit of paper in his wallet now to remind him how to be a good husband.

It might not work for you, but I guess what I'm saying, in a VERY roundabout way is that he has to understand how hurtful and selfish it is to behave like that. And to be honest, I wouldn't do damage control with his family. I would tell the person in his family you are closest to, that you said what you said in anger, because he was disrespectful about your family. That is the truth, after all.

And incidentally, MKG, you are "white", no? (Presuming if your family are...) So where does he get off saying he doesn't like white people? Racist and unacceptable. Poor you.

Yes I am white, our son is white. I think it's funny. He loves my mom and is always doing things for her. For some reason when my sister is around with her dh he gets uptight. He did come with me on Wednesday, and he did say that he enjoyed it. It is hard for him to get to know people, and honestly he doesn't have any real friends.

Personally I think he is just intimidated to be such a poor English speaker, he's speaks well to me, but when in public he freezes up and loses his words and gets confused.

I'm more mad that he said that to his family.

His family knows me well and if I tell them what really happened they will believe me instead of him.

Hmm... I expect the language barrier is a big thing. Perhaps he feels a bit, I don't know, intimidated by your brother in law or something? You know, gets on great with your mum, but when there are other "menfolk" around, it makes him feel less of a man that he has trouble communicating. Does that make ANY sense at all? The fact it's only when your sister and/or her DH are there seems telling in some way.

Yep, the thing about telling his family would bug me the most too. DH has "threatened" me with telling his parents I don't want to visit and all that stuff. I may have thrown things at him for that...

VERY hard for you that he doesn't have his own friends. Does it make you feel a little claustrophobic sometimes?

Thanks JL and Twelfty - I think you're both right; it does seem to be attention seeking behaviour.

MKG - I'm horrified at what your husband has said and done! He's putting you in a difficult position with both sides of the family. I think Twelfty is right - speak to someone from his family that you're especially close to and tell them exactly what has happened. That way they will not only understand what has really happened but may also get on his case a bit about not making an effort with your side of the family.

MKG and Jess. WHAT is the story with Black Friday? Just been watching crazy shoppers on CNBC in awe.

I'm close to all of his family. I'm very social, and talk to everyone. They usually listen to what I say anyway. He knows that too. I'll stop by his sister's house one of these days and have a chat with her. I don't think my dh knows how close I am with his family, everyone knows he talks out of his ass anyway.

He does have a problem with my bil I don't know why. He's great. My dh is very quiet. My bil is very quiet. I think that dh takes my bil's shyness as thinking he's better than everyone. It's also hard for him, because when my sister is around is mainly for big holidays when all the family is there, so he has never gotten to know her very well.

My dh has a lot of issues. He's baby 10 out of 11, which means he got ignored a lot. He never got supported and pushed to go to school so he dropped out. He grew up really poor, where most days they didn't have food. His dad was murdered when he was 3. Imagine being a single mom to 11 kids. His whole family is very shy, and no one thinks they're good enough for other people. They are a bunch of neurotic people.

My mom always introduces him to people as her son, and he can't get over that she accepts him and cares about him so much. Me and my family are the best thing that ever happened to him, and he knows it.

That is really sad. Did you say they were from Mexico or did I just COMPLETELY make that up?

God, 11 kids on your own. My nana was left with 8 and had to have her brother move in to help her support them, but that's NOTHING compared to what you describe.

Some of my dad's family are screwed up. 3 out of the 8 really, so yes, I can see how your DH would be affected by his family situation.

Hopefully being around your lovely family will help him. He still needs to be told what's what though!

You seem ok with it. That's good. x

Blimey, MKG - that is so sad. Makes you realise what tough lives other people have. It's great that he has you and your family who support, love and accept him.

I've gone a bit teary eyed now.

Today I've eaten cereal, toast, Big Mac and large fries, 3 bars of chocolate and two diet cokes. I am starting to feel like such a fraud pretending the bump is baby, when its obviously flab.

I'm 30 next year too. Bubs is due on 27 May and I'm 30 on 1st June, bet I'm giving birth on my birthday. Nice.

Diet cokes... Mwwaahhaa. You might as well go ALL the way Pinkjenny. You go girl.

I'm the same. Had two hamburgers for lunch yesterday.

Hey, my dad just called me to check I was going to my cousin's 40th birthday tonight. Was so convinced it was tomorrow I even wrote it in my diary as such. Good thing he called. Otherwise I would have been sitting on my fat arse at home at 8pm when dad called to see where the hell I was. Hahaha.

Pink Jenny - you and me both. Although mine has a little longer to arrive. 8 days instead of 2!

errr 4 days (can't count pg brain)

Had big fat chip shop chip buttie for lunch and am currently stuffing face with jelly tots.

Have loosened belt to make room for pod, not bellyflab - HONEST!

I'm the same! I am literally mid-conversation and totallt lose my train of thought! Last weekend at the dreaded in-laws, I left the handbrake off dh's car and his father found it propped up by the wall in some bushes. No one could shout at me, how fantastic!

We are going out with friends tomorrow night that don't know I am pg - out 'for a drink' apparently. I guess that makes me the designated driver, has anyone else found themselves dribbling over cocktail menus - or should I get to the nearest AA meeting pronto? Actually, considering my food intake, prob need to join Overeaters Anonymous too. Will make a note.

These days I flick straight to the virgin cocktails page and don't torture myself with the other pages

Am currently justifying my sugar addiction because of the booze calories I'm missing out on. Although have found Cobra alcohol free lager in Morrisons, which means I should probably join the AA too Pinkjenny LOL

Juicy - alcohol free lager? Wonderful. I was just considering a packet of doritos and about to suggest a chinese for tea. I meant to go to slimming world this week to do their 'pregnancy diet'. Dh and mother keep asking me when I am going. Isn't that lovely? I lost two stone last year and am now back in my 'fat' clothes. Anyhoo - Creena - are you still wearing underwired bras? I'm a 38E and am wearing normal underwired bras - feel like a bit of a rebel and probably a bad mother but I was literally resting my boobs on my knees.

Loving the Debenhams range though - must check it out.

Mine is due two days before it's big sister's birthday. She will NOT be happy if she has to share.

Ohmigod am loving my relatively normal, baggage less family... poor you lot....Christmas is stressful enough without all that to contend with. Many )))))hugs((((( coming your way.

My email is [email protected] The dress would be fab JL if you wouldnt mind. I may have to wear very high heels.....

Am knackered, want to go to bed and my parents are not even here yet. Still have dinner and bathtime to do yet...may have a stella Just to numb the bathtime fiasco you understand, no? You lot come and do it then, its easy really....

Uuummmm Beer (said in homer like drool)

May treat myself to a real one tomorrow as going to very hedonistic party where everyone will be off their box by 10pm and I'll be heading home as I don't want to listen to their drunken etc dribble while sober. One beer at the beginning may be a necc. survival tactic methinks. - favourite new symbol

LG&T will get all techy tomorrow and be in touch!

Cool, look foreward to it, its quite good email you know. Especially between mumsnetters, scooter and i know each others real names now and she knows my dh's name (she phsl)

I may have the beer, its cold and calling me.....

Becks alchohol free is the best, also tesco do some fairy nice alcho free white and rose wine

I am not allowed to drink even when not pg, these have saved many a nite in and summer bbq lol

lisa x

Has any else noticed how many bloody adverts advertise alcoholic drinks, i was sat watching CSI last night and in one ad break saw one for Malibu, 1 for red and white wine and 2 for beers. By the time the program came on i was drooling.

Creena, my nan used to act like your MIL, she had 4 children but it was only my dad that used to make time for her yet she could be a right cow to him sometimes. She accused my brother of stealing from her and used to practically call me a prostitue because i wore an anklet (she was old fashioned) and she used to say i walked passed her house every night with a different bloke yet the truth was i never went passed her house so i didnt have to go and see her. That sounds horrible but she was a pain, i did love her lots though. One day it got so bad that when she phoned my dad to moan and say she was going to kill herself my dad told her to go ahead. Luckily she didnt do it (the guilt would have been terrible) but she would wind everyone up so much just to get attention that no one had any patience. It wasnt until a year ago when she got ill that she seemed to change for the better, it was as if knowing she wsa dying made her realise how horrible she had been and in the end her relationship with my dad was better than it ever had been. It must be hard for your Dh but maybe he should be strong and leave her to sulk, she will soon change when she realises that no one is going to put up with her silly moods anymore.

Pinkjenny your birthday is the same day as my wedding anniversary, i am really hoping i dont give birth then but im running out of dates that i would like this baby to arrive on. Its ds1's birthday on my due date (23rd May), my sister's on 25th May and then my anniversary so ideally this baby can arrive either before 23rd or around the 28th or after 4th june (i would prefer it to be a few days early though as i was 2wks late with ds2 and it drove me mad)

lg&t If you think you are a short arse what about me then im only 5ft 2in, my sister is even smaller at 5ft (and shrinking according to her)and my nan was at least 3in shorter.

twelve days - mine is due 2 days after big sister will be 11. I am not sure how she feels about sharing, I will have to ask her!

I am going to a party tomorrow night so shall save my alcohol intake for then. Maybe a large glass of wine if I fancy it. Cold beer does sound good though.

I ended up making the Korma but DP is currently washing up.

twelve days - mine is due 2 days after big sister will be 11. I am not sure how she feels about sharing, I will have to ask her!

I am going to a party tomorrow night so shall save my alcohol intake for then. Maybe a large glass of wine if I fancy it. Cold beer does sound good though.

I ended up making the Korma but DP is currently washing up.

Black Friday is the Friday after Thanksgiving where stores have major sales like %75% off. People camp out overnight, they have maps of malls, malls open at 3 am and people shop all day. I used to work for a Villeroy and Boch store, and Black Friday was always a nightmare. I like to avoid it at all costs.