May 2014 - the Maybies get even closer to Definitely!!

[ClearlyMoo]

I've been brave and started a new thread. Hope the name is ok....

Ha!!

Mine almost fainted even when the doc asked if daddy wanted to cut the cord last time....

Wow I missed so much again! Let's see what I can remember.

moomin I had a kidney infection once. It was painful for about a day before the antibiotics kicked in. I certainly didn't feel like a deserved a holiday because of it It sounds like your mum is really there for you though which is good, and if something did happen that weekend your OH is away, he'd probably really regret his decision for a long time and hopefully learn something from it.

I only have finger signs for people who can't say nice things about people's name choices. What's that saying, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything!

I also have no bedding yet. Do we need a waterproof cover for a Moses mattress? I have the carrycot part of my pram to use as a Moses basket, but nothing for it to go on. Do you think it can go on the floor by my bed?

Also does anyone else's MIL ask them outright how much weight they've put on? 2nd time in as many weeks it happened today. Must be a culture thing. I would never dream of asking anyone how much weight they put on!

Hugs to everyone in pain/itchy/emotional/fed up

The dosage of cocoa mol I take is 30/500 which is 30mg of codine and 500 mg of paracetamol. And can take 2of these 4-6 hourly

OBEM is on
still cant work out if i should be watching or not before got pregnat i watched because i knew nothing about birth and found it did help got rid of a lot of fears

clearly sorry your in so much pain sounds awful take care of yourself xxx

Thanks ladies, you have made me feel better as always :) to be honest I know there's nothing I can do about it anyway, what will be will be and I think it's more important that DP is a good father and role model than whether he is actually there for the moment of birth as some of you say. Just annoying that people are so insensitive lol!! It was not an easy decision for either of us for him to take this job at such a special time, but we were on the verge of not being able to pay our mortgage so he didn't have much choice bless him, it's been so hard for him being away.

Sounds very painful clearly :( hope you mange to get some rest

Moomin, sounds like your mum is so excited bless her, mine is my back up/second birth partner, maybe if you start talking to your OH about arranging back up plans he might shift his head into gear and realise what stress he's putting you under!

Chip you just reminded me that I missed OBEM! Shall have to watch it on 4od 2moro!

Hello all, for clearly, isean, xav and any others with terrible pain/itchiness

moomin, I might be about to give terrible advice - only you will know if it's any good so feel free to ignore. I just want to give another perspective. I feel terrible for you, I would be gutted if DH left me for the weekend at 38 weeks. I also feel sorry for your OH, I get the impression he really does want to be with you but just can't stand up to his family. He sounds so torn and he must be feeling that he can't please anyone. The others are right, he should get a grip & tell his parents no but he hasn't. It may be that he needs to feel part of your team. I imagine he's also worrying about your accommodation situation. He'll also be worried about you, your health, your scar. He's not experiencing the pain you are but he's helplessly watching on. He may be terrified at the thought of being a dad even though he'll love this wee thing more than either of you can imagine just now. And on top of all of this his family are guilt tripping him and making life hard. He may feel more confident if you tackle this problem as a team, a partnership. Give him whatever support he needs to be strong with his parents, be that sympathy & understanding or talking to them. He may feel that there's no one on his side just now and on top of everything else he just can't cope. There'll be so much in the future that you'll partner on in raising your LO, this is a step along the way. I know others will disagree and as I said I might have the wrong end of the stick. But you love him, and if he loves you forming a strong team to face all these challenges will be one way forward.

Haha OH is under no illusions about my mum also being a birth partner, that was made clear from the very start. I'm lucky that my hospital allows two... even if it's looking now like I may only need one nah it all depends on what happens the next few days.

Apparently she has a chest infection and a UTI which is why it's so bad. Still means everyone will be stressed out and if OH dares to try and bring up that weekend tomorrow, his dad will be too preoccupied to talk about it and his sister will probably have a go.

OH did complain the other day that my family are more involved than his, but we spoke today and he seemed to realise that my family are more involved than his because my family have made an effort, I can't force people to care about the pregnancy if they don't. His mum and dad have been trying but I don't think babies have ever been their thing, whereas my mum is still at an age where she could possibly at a push have one (she said she's glad I went ahead and did it or she probably would've ended up getting pregnant she was so broody , but she's getting sterilised this year) and still loves everything to do with babies and kids. And as for his sister... well less said about that the better

I said if they want to be involved that's up to them, the only place I draw the line is them coming to scans/the birth - getting my foof out in front of my mum is going to be bad enough, but them???

Sorry to hear everyone's in so much pain. I've been given cocodamol 30/500s for my scar (they do bugger all for the pain but they knock me out after a while ). I've tried not to take too many as I'm worried about the effect on the baby, but I was given them by the maternity ward, so doubt they'd give them if it wasn't safe :)

im going to mn hq!! just saw that my name was picked out!!

...and breathe!

moomin I'm so sorry to hear you're under so much stress, I feel like I have nothing more to add, except to echo what the others have said.

those in pain I can sympathise, although I don't think I'm as bad as some of you poor ladies

I know what everyone means about names- we're down to 2 for ds1, but we're not going to tell anyone what they are and see what he looks like!

on week 2 of 2 signed off sick and starting to go crazy!

They are guilt tripping your oh now for something's occurring in 4 weeks time!!! He should just say no!

OH is determined he's not going to go back, he's going to stay with me no matter what. If he goes ahead and tells them he can't do it tomorrow, I will be both a) massively hugely relieved and maybe considering having him as birth partner again, b) in the shit with his sister but oh well, and c) annoyed that we've had all this palava when we really don't need it!!

Sneaky hints all through today that my parents had to cancel their weekend away (I've sat there oohing and aahing at Hoseasons lodges as I'm going to get them some vouchers so they can go away when it suits them) seem to have helped.

Maybe the Mumsnet massive that we are can email your oh family ;-)

Haha can't see that going badly at all bornin

Sorry to those of you in pain. Clearly, that sounds horrendous! I was struggling earlier with pain in my bum and wondering how I'll make it to my next physio appointment but it seems to have eased off a bit now.

Watching OBEM tonight and wondering why they were all put flat on their backs?!

Ooh congrats PotatoPolly, that will be do interesting.

Loopy I was thinking the same thing about this weeks and last weeks (apart from 1) labours - they are all on their backs. I must have said "why are they on their backs" 4 times during tonight's program, he got very bored of me.

Woke up needed loo. Followed twenty minutes of agony while I hopped (I wish, more an awful painful one legged limp) then crawling to the bathroom to wee. Our bathroom light pull needs extending to crawling height if this is to continue. Just got back into bed (it really did take twenty mins the bathroom is a few metres away) and had a little cry. I know this isn't the worst that can happen and baby is ok etc I'm just suddenly petrified of 10-12 weeks trapped in our tiny house.

I don't necessarily think it's fair to assume the women were 'put' on their backs - it's some peoples natural birthing position (ie. me) I'd have hated to be told to do anything different.

Moo, you should have seen Me yesterday, I was playing with the dc and ended up led on the wooden floor. I was stuck for about an hour as I haut couldn't move! Dd1 (3) thought it was funny and took lots of photos dd2 (2) thought it was a game and kept jumping on me which made the pain worse, and there was nothing I could do! It was very funny but laughing hurt and I ended up on the phone to my mum laughing hysterically because I was literally stuck, couldn't move my legs or head and there was nothing anyone could do!

Finally after an hour I plucked up the courage to get up but it hurt like hell!

Tbh, it does sound like you have pgp, wrt the codeine, just take it when you need it, that's what I do!

Codine is not great as a one off painkiller as it is supposed to be taken regularly and then the relief it gives gets better and better with each dose.

Re: obem one was also a kiwi delivery and one was a section. The only one who could have birthed in any other position was the older blonde woman.

I agree with the codine. Needs to be taken regularly for a couple
Of days for it to be effective...
And when it works it works

So wrt birthing positions, I've seen a lot about on their backs being the 'wrong' position - is it a one-size-fits-all kind of thing, or do different positions work for different people - I know a lot of people say hands and knees or leaning on something works best?

Haven't watched OBEM yet, didn't feel up to it last night. Hormones took over; I saw a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio at the Oscars and started crying about 'How much he deserves it' so I figured snuggly newborns probably not the best thing

haha moomin, yeah that was probably wise!

I totally get that different positions work for different people. The thing that surprised me most was when the mw told the partner to put the top of the bed completely flat - I was a bit puzzled as to why! Maybe just to give more room for baby to.exit or something.

clearly - did you ever get anywhere with your physio referral or did the uti diagnosis get in the way of all that? Hope you get some relief of some sort soon

Future FIL (you can tell they're in the good books, they're future in laws again rather than "OH's family" ) has made my day.

As soon as OH got back there this morning (called in before his speed awareness course - despite there not being a proper supermarket, a hospital or a gym for miles around, they have a speed awareness course centre ), his dad said "I'm not happy with you being back here two weeks before the birth". They've sorted it, simple as that

I'm just praying now for a stress-free next eight weeks. That and some sleep before baby arrives would be lovely thanks for all your advice and help.