May 2014 - the Maybies get even closer to Definitely!!

[ClearlyMoo]

I've been brave and started a new thread. Hope the name is ok....

Hobb apparently they can't because of the nature of these birds... they're generally the ones who get called out to help other people's birds of prey. They have to be fed dead baby chicks once a day and there's about 23 birds in the garden. The dogs are completely bonkers and climb over everyone and everything so I'm not sure even the most patient sitter would be able!!

YANBU Moomin - my DP is being very good making sure anything after 36 weeks that we are doing has back up people ready and prepared in case we can't be there - 38 weeks is far too far gone IMO to be running around 2 hours away from home and hospital. You may have already had baby and then what? He leaves you for a weekend with a one or two week old? No I don't think so.

Best thing if they can't change it I think would be you go with him (so you're not stranded alone) and if you go into labour whilst you're there you both leave immediately and get to hospital ASAP. If you have baby beforehand neither of you go. Either way they will need someone on standby. Can you get your DP to suggest they have a standby "just in case" and point out to them that there is a chance you'll have a baby/be in labour that weekend?? Then there is at least a neighbour or something with a key for the dogs and you don't have to worry about it?

That's made me really cross actually. How inconsiderate!! What does your DP say about it?

moom that's APPALLING. You're not an in-law hater and to be quite honest THEY are being ridiculous expecting to keep OH away at such a late stage in your pg. That is appalling. I am spitting tacks now. JESUS that's awful. There are dogsitters available all over the place, I'm sure they have dog-owning friends who would be able and willing and NOT HAVE A GIRLFRIEND WHO COULD POP AT ANY BLOODY TIME!

Oh and (hugs) for Bornin - I know how you feel. DP had a Stag do recently and I felt very out of place wandering around waiting for him to come home. We're not usually apart of an evening and it was weird!

I know people who have looked after birds of prey and dissected chicks etc. for people on holiday. There ARE people about who are capable of looking after them. They need to phone bird sanctuaries and ask them for a recommendation for someone suitable.

Grrrrrrr

OH doesn't want to rock the boat, he doesn't want to stop his parents going away because they deserve a weekend away, and doesn't want to stop his sister going away because it's her anniversary and she's only just starting to come round to the idea of us having a baby (not sure why that's my problem but I digress )

I know they probably could arrange to pay for someone but I guess they've just said hey, (my OH) will do it for free, it's not like he has anything important happening around that time after all

I'm scared to go back there because a) the dogs have no concept of personal space - I'm a dog lover, my family have a dog but she's sweet and gentle. These jump at everything, bark constantly, nip quite a lot etc. And b) it's two and a half hours from the hospital I'm supposed to give birth at. Usually it's an hour and a bit from the nearest hospital, but they've closed the bridge to the next town, so they have to go the long way around which makes it two hours to that hospital too, and it's a terrible one to give birth at from what I've heard.

His parents are lovely but they're the sort to say "Come on, what are the chances of you going into labour THAT weekend" (not chances I'm willing to take!!!) and his sister is the sort to make snide comments about me being overemotional and ruining people's plans if the weekend was to pass without me going into labour.

I had DD1 at 37+3, Moomin. First babies aren't always late. No unusual circumstances she was just ready to arrive then, so did! Within two hours of me realising I was in labour. So YANBU to keep your OH close!

moom totally agree with everyone else. They need to find an alternative!!! They are being unreasonable, not you! I'm actually really cross on your behalf.

Sorry to hear about the piles everyone! I haven't got any yet but I was feeling a bit bunged up earlier this week - I started eating dates because I read they had a high iron content, and since then everything has been moving along a lot more nicely! Nice side effect. They're a bit tastier than prunes, which also have high iron and would do a similar job!! :-) I'm about a week in to taking spatone and have been eating lots of things with iron in them and I defo feel a bit more perky .

Phew, it's the weekend!!!! We are getting our new, family friendly car tomorrow and dh has just gone to b&q to buy stuff to make shelves for the spare room. It's march tomorrow, it all feels a bit close all of a sudden!

Moomin I would just say no.

My sisters have always had kids, so it's fallen to me to do jobs for my parents. They were planning on going on holiday when I'm 38 weeks. I straight away pre-empted them asking me, so told them straight away me and DH couldn't do their jobs while they are away (they are self employed so some stuff has to be done by family when they are on holiday). Their response was to say can DH not do it as we know how to do it and my sisters don't, but I just refused and they were fine about it. I'm normally a people pleaser and do stuff to save awkwardness but was pleased I stood my ground and I actually think they just hadn't considered it from my point if view until I pressed it.

moomin I echo what everyone else says. They're pushing you about and I'd just say no. Surely your dp can't be considering it?! He has to put you and his unborn child first! His family sound awful.

I think your dh needs to rock the boat and he needs to learn that you and the baby need to come first now moomin!!! Sound so iek he needs to stand up to these people so they learn not just to expect him to be there at their beck and call!!! He has his own family that need to come first!!!

If anyone can do with a laugh, head over to a thread about funny things said in labour... I've just sat here laughing so hard the baby has been going mental!

Also... Random I know but I've been wondering how many nappies to put in my hospital bag- wanted to take enough to be covered, but not a huge package that would take up space, but not loose ones because they'd go everywhere in my bag () BUT just found sainsbos do a newborn pack of 27(ish) that are really tightly packed in, so nice and compact, and only £1.90! (I warned you it was random!)

Moomin your OHs family sound like a total PITA you might just have to put your foot down and be firm.

Hello, just thought I'd stop by and say hi... I was originally on here but had a MC in October (with ERPC) however I got my BFP last week so I'm now back and n the November club! Yay!
Fingers crossed this one sticks!
Hope you are all well and blooming into your 3rd tri!
:D

Think it'll be Intervention time when he gets back from work! Thanks everyone. The more I think about it, the more angry/panicky I get, it's really got me worked up

Great news MammySam!!! Congrats on your BFP, fingers crossed for a healthy uneventful pregnancy!!

Another hand up here in agreement. 37 weeks, the bun is officially baked so nobody goes anywhere.

From the past behavoiur of your OHs family, they sound spoiled rotten.
I used to be just like your OH. The skivvy of the family. I saw the truth of it when I finally stood my ground for the first time at the ripe old age of 30. I won't lie, it wasn't pleasant but I am happier now and don't let them put me down anymore. It may be something your OH has to do in his own time but labour trumps a house sitter.

Piles. I will repeat a gem of advice I got from MN Push them back in, if you can.

Good luck mammysam xx

Congrats MammySam. Great to hear!

yay great news mammysam! Congratulations!!

Yay, brilliant news MammySam. So pleased you popped back in to let us know.

Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy.

Congrats mammysam!

The funny things you've said in labour thread is utterly hilarious!!! Good for a laugh!

You tell him Moomin! No way should he be going that far from you when you may go in to labour any day. It's very unfair of them to ask him. He is a grown up who is having a baby and you come first now, not them! Just sit him down and tell him there's a very real chance of you going into labour before or during the weekend, you may even have a baby or may have just given birth etc. is he prepared to leave your side if you're halfway through pushing out his baby because he has to go feed his parents pets?

Stoopid PILs

Congrats and very best of luck mummysam, lovely news

We spoke about this when we agreed to move in together, I told him that I didn't want to live with him if he'd drop everything at the last second to look after the animals or run some kind of errand for his parents.

Same happened when I found out I was pregnant, I told him that I didn't want him involved if he couldn't promise me he wouldn't just run back if they decided to go away (real emergencies etc I can understand as a last resort, not a holiday) and needed him if I needed him more.

I can't say anything to his family because I'm the 'controversial' younger girlfriend and now the 'controversial' pregnant teenager and now I'm asking them to time going away around giving birth to their controversial grandchild. I need to stop letting his sister's comments get to me so much

Re: Co-sleeping. I found the same as Spirael with my DSs - they loved their space and both slept through the night from roughly 8 weeks though both stayed in my room for atleast 9 months. The girls have both loved co-sleeping though and DD2 stayed with me for 12 months til she was fully weaned. We use a normal cot on the middle setting with one side off right up against the bed.

Dobe - my 4 share a bedroom and I never know who is going to be asleep where when I go in of a morning!

Re: Piles - miserable!!!! I get them after birth. They aren't fun at all :(

Moomin - all my babies have been early. DP is on lock down from 36 weeks onwards. Your OH needs to do some boat rocking, you and the baby really do need to start coming first now.... It seems to be one thing after another with his family!

Congrats Mammysam :)

X-posts. Bollocks to their controversial anything! You're an adult woman who is having a baby and you deserve to be accorded the respect and support due to you by members of what should be considered your family!! I'm so angry on your behalf - I'd be mightily miffed at OH for even considering it tbh. Has he considered what would happen if your existing gastro troubles meant that the baby was early?

How long have u been together moomin?? Are you sure he is fully committed
To you and the baby of he willin to go runnin for them willy Milly?!

Sorry to be asking - but if I knew my dh well enough, he wouldn't want to be any further than half an hour away on the bus when we knew baby was immenent! I can't work out ur partners logic by pissing off two hours up the road :-/