January 2014 Thread 16 - More babies arrive or we make delicious lasagnes whilst we wait

[enormouse]

Here you go - New thread! (Procrastinating wildly)

Also, it's fine to see how things go, but it needs to be your decision as to how well you're coping.

Mrsv - I agree with others. 1 week.is not long enough and if I'm honest 2 weeks isn't enough either. I'm dreading dh going to work on Wednesday and this is our 4th child

I'm also dreading dh going back to work after 2 weeks! I'm actively planning to do nothing at all for the first week he's back.

We're also using dentinox, according to the health visitor there isn't a big difference between it and infacol, but they both work best when used regularly.

MrsV I think that he needs to support you as you wish to be supported. I found the second week fine with all of mine, but 3 weeks and 5-6 weeks harder due to feeding marathons (growth spurts). They still don't do much more a month on, still eat, poo, sleep mainly, but around 5 weeks they do become more alert and look at you more.

Bunt lovely name choice :)

mrsv i agree that 2 weeks isn't really enough off as you really want to be a family, but i haven't minded dh being at work. Tbh i don't really do much in the day except look after bubs and do the odd chore, but its because its taking me longer than i thought to get back to myself and feel ready for the big world.
If dh did more when he got home id love him being at work.

mrsg how do you get bubs to take the dentinox? We have infacol but she just spits most of the stuff out as soon as i squeeze it in her mouth. She writhes around a lot, goes red and pulls her legs up so i assume its gas!?

I feel really lucky DH is managing to take three weeks off once baby deigns to arrive - we'll be able to muddle through together that bit linger!

Well, highlight of my day was getting prescribed a steroid cream by my midwife for the itchy bump - the rash has gone ballistic and is stopping me sleeping now, joy. This baby needs to evacuate the womb pronto!

MrsV a week is a very short time! DP was off for almost 4 weeks which was very lucky because of Christmas week but even that didn't seem long enough. It's rubbish that partners hardly get any paternity leave as standard, it should definitely be more

Sylvie has just had 4oz, then another 1oz and now another 2oz as she was still hungry! I can't believe it

frizz - another dentinox fan here! DH mostly administers. He's a dentist so much better with syringes and little squirmy people moving about and big ones too!

He recommends holding firmly round the back if the neck (between thumb and index finger) with baby facing you and head propped up and then putting syringe in the top of the cheek, beside the gum. Then slowly administering the dose, giving time to swallow. It's harder for them to spit out that way.

Hope that helps. I luffs dentinox.

mrsv - hope this wont be the case but point out to DH that you could daily be in hospital for a few days - even a week. Therefore two consecutive weeks is better

Ellen welcome and congratulations on your new arrival. Sounds like you had a tough birth experience, but as others said that doesn't detract from the great mummy you are being. My DD is very needy, clingy and wants to be held to sleep. COMPLETELY different to my DS! Don't think I'm doing anything different, just different personalities I suppose.

Again, as others have said, sleep deprivation affects everything. I've felt really low at times but have known its hormones and lack of sleep. If your hv has suggested PND what support have they offered? If it is that you need the help ASAP.

Have you tried swaddling your baby? I've found she gets really tired from 6 onwards. I thought it was wind but I now think she's overtired. Swaddling has seemed to help her drift off. She also slept for more than 1 hour windows last night.
I know it's not had the best press recently but I figured I need to sleep!
I've got one of those swaddle blankets that someone gave me. She loves the feeling of being cocooned it seems!

Mrs one week will fly by so insist he has 2 weeks off together. This reminded me of my DH as he suggested the same with DS. He just didn't realise how much work a newborn is, and he ended up taking the 2 weeks together with both and moaning each time he didn't want to go back.

Frizz a change is as good as a break...you can't be expected to be 'on shift' 24,7. DH jobs are bath time of DS and DD when she's bigger (I dunk her in now with DS and sort her out) and the shift from 9-11/12 ish whilst I get a bit of sleep. I used to cook dinner when he was bathing DS but now we have 2 he often does that whilst I'm feeding or settling her. Remind him YOU ARE A TEAM! It's probably come as a shock to him this parenting malarkey but he does need to support you.

Going to get some newborn photos of Lara done today. Looking forward to the finished thing but not the actual photo shoot as it was long with DS. Those on their first child....think carefully as what you do for one you should do for another. (Says the lady who had big jealousy issues growing up and who wants to avoid that with her children )

pidgy I'm hoping hell have that realisation when it happens too. Fingers crossed

DH has had a month off (2 weeks Pat, 2 weeks holiday) and it doesn't feel like enough! Getting used to having a baby in the house is hard work, you both feel like you've been hit by a train. Fingers crossed he comes to his senses!

Yesterday I said to DH that I wanted Henry to sleep in his cot, just from 10-3 so that I could have 5 hours sleep before he comes into our bed and I don't sleep properly. I was sent to bed at 9:30 by DH and he brought Henry up at 2:30 so that I could have my 5 hours. Which was so lovely!

He was making up for the fact he didn't get out of bed until Noon yesterday like

Hi all not been around this week and sorry the below is long.

Alice Marianna was born at 13:59 on Wednesday 29th following a failed induction that started on Saturday 25th with ctx at most 4 minutes apart ctx from the 27th.

I don't feel too bad about the failed induction or eventual emcs (due to failure to progress and position) as Alice refused to turn her head and had wedged sideways into my pelvis so couldn't decend. I am though appalled at my care on the antenatal ward prior to moving to the labour ward and may write it up later.Â

Alice is adorable and I can't believe she's only been in out lives for 3days. She has though destroyed both my breasts already so they are too raw and saw for her to feed. The right is one big hard scab and the left not much better.Â

On Thursday we had some problems while still in the postnatal ward as she wouldn't feed then wouldn't wake then couldn't wake so nicu was suggested by the doctors. I think this is why I didn't change her latch and allowed her to cut me (she only takes the nipple and cuts the base of the nipple with her gums).Â

Lastnight / tonight where horrible as she won't settle unless she's with me on the bed and dh won't let us both sleep while she's in the bed which while we this sleep deprived irritable and still have duvets I do agree with though can't always see.Â

Off to catch up on everything I've missed and congratulations to all the other new mums.

Congratulations fly sorry to hear about the problems you had/ are having. Hopefully it'll all get easier soon :)

So just called the hospital to ask whether I can use mlu even if induced and apparently can if I remain low risk. For some strange reason mw wrote high risk on my notes yesterday so hopefully this won't mess things up! Also have a bishops score of 3 which I shouldn't have googled so will just take it as it comes

On the leaflet it says dh has to go home at 8.30pm if still not in labour (and think this is what they said at antenatal class) but lady on phone just said he can stay 24hr. Hope she's right. Although still would have to persuade dh to stay with me and the way he's being at the moment (including mentioning he might go to work on Monday) I'm not too hopeful :(

mrsv I am going to stick my neck out and say that if (IF) you have a reasonable delivery and feel positive about it, if it isn't long and drawn out and you have a reasonable sleep bank within you and if you don't have stitches, then one weeks paternity will be ok, just. I also agree that if he can take a second week or a weeks holiday three or four weeks later that's when you are properly knackered after a month of broken sleep and the growth spurts etc, and having oh around then will be a great support. BUT if you have a long drawn out delivery, stitches and other medical issues, then one week really isn't long enough as you will hardly be up and walking by then. Is there any way he can make a decision based n how you are feeling at the time?

ellen hugs, sounds rough. I think being kind to yourself and knowing that nothing lasts forever, e,g, within a matter of weeks they will all be sleeping through the night (mind you, could take 52 of them...) this newborn phase is survival not enjoyment and you just need to muddle through the first 6-8 weeks accepting whatever happens regarding how you get your baby to sleep...anything goes, but another tip is to replace the last bf of the day with formula, it's harder to digest and so should buy you a 4-5 hour run of sleep.

All ok here, I took my last antibiotic this morning which is good as Lucy has been impossible to settle the last few days. I have resorted to turning n the hair dryer now...weirdly it des work.

fly hugs too...we are here to listen whenever you are ready. Part of my reason fr wanting a home birth this time was the appalling antenatal care I received with ds2. So I do sympathise.

Congratulations fly should you need to sound off, we're here x

mythree thank you. That is what dh is thinking. He is saying we can see how it goes and hell take 2 if we need it but I'm not sure whether his work are clear on this or whether he's just saying it to keep me happy!

Agree that one week is minimal. I was in hospital for six nights, if DH had only taken one week leave we'd barely have been home before he went back.

Discharged by mws today, yay. Alex has put on 200g this week, and is doing well. I have a UTI again, and have to wait until tomorrow night to get a prescription, as this time they insist on running full labs on urine to see what it is. Bloody hurts, is what it is.

fly congrats on Alice's safe arrival, and hugs for you. I've been encouraged to make a complaint about my postnatal care, so you're not alone.

Arg! My very judgemental sil is coming over in an hour. We've been getting the house ready for my mom coming over (tomorrow! Yey!!) and i thought i was doing ok today. Ive cleaned, make packet mix cake with ds but now I'm having a crash in confidence. None of my clothes fit. None. I'm in leggings and a hoodie now but cant stay in it because i feel my arse is exposed. And massive.

I've pretty much lived in pjs the rest of the time, no matter which visitor. Just wanted to vent really. Add to that I'm still leaking milk and now one nipple is rubbed raw - how?! I don't breastfeed - I'm feeling particularly shit.

I feel your pain frying. My arsehole FIL is visiting in an hour. I'm planning on escaping upstairs to "rest" as much as possible. It's reached the point where I no longer care if he knows I dislike him since he doesn't try to be likable.

I have a sinus infection and a sore boob and one of them is making me feel shivery and cold. Really hope it's not mastitis again. Poor Alex also has a blocked nose and is NOT happy about it. DH keeps suggesting I suck the bogies out but I think I have suffered enough for the little blighter and he should do it if he thinks it will help.

Sorry everyone's having a rubbish time. frying wear what you're comfortable in. You've just had a baby, no one is going to judge you. I agree with tarka excuse yourself to 'rest' if you need to will miss being able to use this as an excuse to be unsociable

Fuck judgey relatives. I cried on my MIL the other day. Admittedly she's lovely, but I'd have done it regardless.

Alex and I are settled in front of the Wales Italy game (tried to teach her the welsh anthem, but she is resolutely sleeping). As long as she doesn't scream and spoil the rugby.

Frizz we're doing similar to Gobbo with dentinox, syringe into the side of the cheek. She spits a bit out but she's getting better with it :)

fly congrats on the safe arrival of your little one but sorry about the crappy care. Def complain if you need to, not just for your own sake but to make sure it doesnt happen to someone else.

Booo to crappy relatives. Am lucky with mine so far as no one has dropped by or cared what i am wearing. MIL even said that she might pop round one day and take aurelia on a walk so i can nap.

Thanks for the syringe tips. Am giving it a try to see if it helps.
Aurelia is doing some great 'follow through farts' as i like to call them. They start off as a fart and end as explosive poop!
Was awake for most of last night with her asleep on me. Dh was helping and took her from 11:30pm til 12:45am when she settled in the moses basket. Then she woke to feed at 1:30am and i had her sleeping on me until 5am. I did wake dh up at 3am to switch but before i had even got to sleep i could see he was drifting off with her on him (not good) He claims he wasnt but he had his eyes closed and his head was slowly falling to one side (the fact that he closed his eyes intentionally to start with as he seems to think that he can stay awake and watch her at 1am with his eyes closed - of course hes gonna fall asleep) He got her to settle in her basket by 6am and she slept until 7:30am and then woke to feed. Dh took her downstairs at 8am and i slept until 10am and omg it was amazing!!