July 2011 we're entering the second half!

[confuddledDOTcom]

F1rstT1meMummy 25/6/11
Ickle: EDD 29/6 pg#1 age 31
Pesha: EDD 30/6 pg#4, age 32, (dd 10yrs, ds1 7yrs, ds2 3yrs)
Blueberryjam EDD 1/7 PG#5 AGE 27 ( 7,6,4 & 8 months)
Loueytbg EDD 1/7 PG#3 Age 37 (DS1&2 3.6, 1 mc)
Tebbles EDD 1/7 PG#1 Age 29 (No DC yet)
Orchid: EDD 1/7 pg#2 age 31 (DS 2)
WolfcubEm83: EDD 1/7 pg#1 age 27
Phlebas: EDD 2/7 PG#10, age 35 (dd1 10yrs, ds 4yrs, dd2 18mo)
Riddzy: EDD 3/7 PG1, Age 31
MadAboutTheBoys 3/7 PG#3 Age 34 (DS1 3yrs; DS2 17 months)
Emmylou30: EDD4/7 pg#1 age 30
Mitchell81: EDD 4/7 pg#4 age 29(dd 10 yrs,ds1 4yrs, ds2 2yrs)
Eglu: EDD 5/7 pg#3, age 33 (DS 7 & 3) - Girl
Twit: EDD 5/7 pg#6 age 35 (3 ds's 12,9,3 one dd 4)
Countrybunkin: EDD 6/7 pg#14 age 26
Miss Lolita: EDD7/7 pg#1 age 31 - girl
ScarIettOHara: EDD 8/7 pg#1 age 34
Oceanfox: EDD 08/07 pg1 age 37
Smiler80: EDD 08/07 pg#1 age 30
Fiatlux: EDD 08/07 pg#1 age 36
MeesaMum: EDD 9/7 pg#1 age 30
wolfhound, EDD 9 July pg#3 age 40 (DS1 is 3 and DS2 is 16 mths)
Mrsfarge: EDD 9/7, pg#4, age 34 (ds 9, dd 3, ds 2)
Scarthy: EDD 10/7 pg#2 age 35 (DS 3yrs)
SpannerPants: EDD 10/7 age 27 pg#1 - boy
emilyplus1: EDD 10/7 pg#2 age 25 (DD 17 months)
confuddledDOTcom: EDD 11/7/11 girl (expected to last until May, ELCS will be mid-June if I last that long and they get their own way) age 30 (3 girls: 1 angel and two amazing girls age 4 and 2)
Sweetiexxx: EDD 11/7 pg#2 age 32 (DD 17 months)
Highheelsandequations EDD 11/7 pg#2 age 30 (no DC yet)
Rarewelshbit: EDD 11/7 age 33 (no DC yet)
Scrivette: EDD 12/7 pg1, age 30 (no DC yet)
canny77 12/7/11
NNABAIW: EDD 13/7 pg#2 age 33 (DD 15 months)
Stottiecake: EDD 13/7 pg2, age 37 (ds 2)
StormBird: EDD 13/7 pg2, age 28 (no DC yet)
Squirrel007 EDD 13/7 PG#1 Age 29 (No DC yet)
BeatrixRotter: EDD 14/7 pg#2 age 34 (DD 2)
kalp12 14/7/11
Sues1974: EDD 15/7 pg#2 age 36 (DS 21 months)
filey1: EDD 16/7 pg#1 age 28 (no DC yet)
pennyly: EDD 16/7 pg#1 age 32 (no DC yet)
JazzS: EDD 16/7 pg#1 age 29 (no DC yet)
Nicolamumof3: EDD 17/7 pg4 age 33 (DS's aged 11.6, 4.11 and 3.3)
youpie: EDD 17/7 pg#2 age 34 (ds 16 months)
Nitnatnaboo: EDD 17/7 pg#2 age 38 (ds 5 yrs)
Highfibrediet EDD 17/7 pg#4 age 38 (ds1 8y, ds2 6y, ds3 2 1/2y)
Fraochsmum: EDD 17/7 pg2 age 33 (dd 11 months)
Hefner: EDD 17/7 pg#1 age 28
a11J: EDD 18/7 p#1 age 21
Stangirl: EDD 19/7 pg2 age 41 (DD 9 months)
Fab123: EDD 19/7 pg#1 age 29
Zanzicat: EDD 20/7 pg#1 age 30
Pregnant inParis: EDD 20/7 pg#1 age 30
isitreallythattime: EDD 20/07 pg#2 age 32
Dynababy: EDD 21/7 pg#1 age 34
FessaEst: EDD 21/7 pg#3 age 30 (mc & DD 13 months)
cara2244: EDD 21/7 pg#2 age 31 (DS 2 years)
FallingandLaughing: EDD 22/7 pg#1 age 33
Geordiemam4: EDD 23/7 pg#4 age 31 (DD age 13, DS age 11, DS age 8)
Brassicababe: EDD23/7 pg#1 age 37
Brightsideoflife: EDD23/7 pg#3 age 33 (DD 19 months)
PixieOnaLeaf EDD 23/7 pg#6 Age 44 (DD1 16, DD2 12, DS 9, DTD1 8 months, DTD2 8 months)
GruffaloMama EDD 23/7 pg2 age 35 (DS 2.1)
Inbetweener EDD 24/7 pg3 age 36 ( DD 8 DD 6 )
LadyGoneGaga: EDD 24/7 pg#3 age 32 (DS age 2.5, mc)
honeybabymoon EDD 24or 25/7 age 30 (no DCs)
Emmywoo: EDD 26/7. pg## age 33 dd 4 and mc
Chocoflakes: EDD 27/7 pg#3 age 37 (dd15,ds13)
Ivegotmrbitey: EDD27/7 pg#1 age 31
SelenaDoula 27/7/11
Sugargirl1: EDD 28/7 pg#2 age 32 (DD 13months)
Badgerwife: EDD 22/7 pg#1 age 30
Buttonmoon78: EDD 29/7 pg#5 age 32 (DCs 13, 10 & 3)
ddas: EDD 31/7 pg#1 age 26
sunshiney78: EDD 31/7 pg 1 age 31
ZuluWarrior: EDD ?/7 pg#3 age 32 (DS 20 months)
JimmyChoo17: EDD 16/07 P#1 Age 29

Bumble, mine has gone from agony/staggering about the house in pain by 4.00, to manageable. Comes back with a vengeance if I overdo it or forget one of the helpful things. Eg the other day I sat on a chair for an hour without my lumbar support and it was painful. It got worse and worse for about a month, then started get better. SEated yoga postures are a big help too. Sitting not standing is also important I find. I hope yours stays better for a good while longer!

Twit I did that! Most of my stuff has been lent out and then 'lent' on so I'm getting most stuff new. Bought some vests the other day, took them out of the packet and folded it (obviously against me) and thought 'oh hell'.

My SPD seems to be stable. My back pain is increasing but that's a different issue. I have hypermobile joints (so really, truly don't need to release my pelvis) and scoliosis in my spine. I'm finding that if I'm really good (and laze about doing very little then it's not too bad though. I need to ring the physio today as my referral should be though. Anyone fancy opening a book to see how long it'll be?!

Thinking of everyone with poorly kids. Fab thinking of you with your tosser difficult ex - I think that you really have final call on names. You've put up with a lot from him. By all means if he wants to be involved then let him, but on your terms!

On the upside, my nephew is out of hospital. My sister said she knew he was feeling better - when he'd had enough boob he bit her again!

Pants. Really should review my posts...

morning ladies, just wanted to say happy monday really!! another week closer to d-day.

have mw this week, should get booked for GTT. But more importantly have pedicure and facial this afternoon

have a good day all x

Morning all,

Sleepless night last night worrying. Quite teary too :( He's been messaging pleading with me "for the sake of the child" not to have my chosen name (Ophelia) and saying if I do i'll be a bad mum as she'll be bullied horrifically, drown herself or be a chav with no knowledge of Shakespeare. Apparently all of his "friends" (yes, the ones he didn't want to know I was pregnant when we were together!) have also decided it's a terrible name and have been keen to tell him what they think. Despite me saying I won't pander to them or him and pointing out he has few rights and may need to think about proving himself a little more before making demands, he flew into a rage. Called me crazy, said he should have broken up with me months before he did and that he knows I will bad mouth him to her and doesn't want any part of it. Again. Apparently I am causing HIM stress!

Girls, i've had enough. I seriously don't want my daughter to get to know this man and i've literally been lying in bed all night sweaty and worried that he's going to turn up out of the blue in a few years and make trouble. Seeing as he's leaving the country before winter anyway I don't see that he was going to be a "dad" to her. I've now told him that I don't want any more from him as it's getting us no where and I won't be mentioning him to her for years, so he doesn't need to worry about me bad mouthing him at all. I feel terrible but after months of anxiety and all of my friends telling me to ditch him and stop letting him contact me and demand things, I finally broke. He knew it was the weekend of the anniversary of my mum's death as well as my baby shower and he's done his level best to trash both of them with nasty sulky rude and cruel texts and emails.

Please someone tell me that i'm not going to be letting my daughter down by doing this? I stuck with it because I can't bear the thought of him turning to her in years time and saying "I wanted to see you but your mother wouldn't let me!". Now I feel I have given him that but I honestly can't bear it any more :(

oh fab hunnie what a sodding bastard, i'd kick him when the sun don't shine bloody arsehole.

Ophelia is a beautiful beautiful name i love it!

I think you need to delete any further texts he sends unread or block him from your phone for a while. Can't he see what an immature twat he's being?? Well obviously not as it hasn't stopped him to date What a damn fool.

My own parents seperated but i was alot older age 7 but they had always had a rocky marriage due to my fathers controlling/aggressive behaviour towards my mum not to mention countless affairs. She covered up for him for years after the split and didn't tell me what an arsehole he was. I idolised him, but saw his true colours for myself but not until i was alot older. Fortunately all resolved now and we get on fine. I also have an amazing stepfather, so very blessed.

Just think of you and that little one now, put yourself first end of you don't need anymore input from him now. If he continues to harrass you he must be aware that you will take steps to end all contact legally if needs be.

Of course you're letting her down.

What??!! Are you insane? He's screwing with your mind. I think it's a beautiful name and wanted it for one of my girls but DH is a boring old fart bit traditional so vetoed it. So I can't answer the bullied bit but neither of them are chavs and they do know about Shakespeare (like that matters anyway) and that wouldn't change just with their name.

Seriously, I know it's easy for us to say but you really are not letting her down by removing this source of stress from your life. You're not going to tell here it was an immaculate conception, are you? No, you'll tell her when she's old enough the facts in a dispassionate way. She will see that you have loved her and stuck by her and if she wants to meet her dad she will, with your blessing. But you cannot allow this idiot to run you into the ground.

Please tell him that unless he can be more civil then the only reason he can contact you is to discuss access arrangements which will not be unsupervised for at least a few months after the birth and you'll be needing that time to establish BF (whether or not you do is irrelevant).

We are all here for you. Please, when you feel the need, just have a rant - I'd rather that than you bottle it all up.

So, in essence, plenty of hugs, , a lot of virtual and more than a bit of chocolate.

Oh, and will the MW you are seeing now be responsible for your after care? Do you get on? If so, talk to her. Enlist her help in dealing with him afterwards. Mine was like a terrier looking after me last time. And that was with DH who was trying to help!

Thanks Nicola, I've blocked his emails but can' block him on my iPhone (without paying anyway) so will just have to delete unread messages. He flies back to UK today :(

I had similar with my folks - they used to tell me all sorts of things about the other when I stayed with them. I just want to avoid all of that for her. Unlikely that he would have actually seen her after winter anyway.

Feeling like a weight has been lifted now I've got up and had some toast. Sorry for the early morning blues folks! x

Thanks Button - seeing the midwife on Thursday so will talk to her about it. I haven't seen the same one more than once so far...but think I need to tell them that he's been getting to me. I feel a bit at sea sometimes and a bit of extra help can't hurt.

Glad you like the name too Nicola, IMO it's better than Pixie or Maddison that he wanted ;)

Pardon? And he accused you of turning her into a chav? What an idiot. There are both of those at our primary school and they are both proper chavtastic.

Glad you're feeling a little more positive. Keep your chin up.

If it comes to it, don't cover for him. Tell your daughter the truth in as dispassionate a manner as you can. You owe this man nothing, not a bean and certainly no respect. You don't want to screw your daughter up by poisoning her against him (which I know you won't do anyway) but you certainly don't owe him any rose tinted specs for his child.

Oh heck. I bet I've just trashed someone's chosen names . If I have, sorry. It's your baby, your choice.

But I still don't like them

Fab - I don't know the full story as haven't read thread for weeks but it does sound like ex is being an arse!

My dd has a different dad to the others. We split up when she was 9mo, tbh he'd never really been interested in her or made any effort to be involved or bond with her. He hung around for a while and saw her a bit but only really to get at me. He moved away soon after her 1st birthday and didn't bother with contact. I met my current dp when she was 21months old and he has been a brilliant dad to her. XP turned up with a new gf when she was 2 and wanted to see her again so I agreed and he had her one wkend a month for about a year. He was a nightmare to deal with, still very bitter and angry (not cos he wanted to be with me, just cos I'd had the nerve to leave him!) and then after one argument (I asked for that month's maintenance) told me if I he had to keep dealing with me then he would just walk away, I told him that if he was prepared to walk out on his dd so easily then it was best for her if he just did it, I had a text from him in reply that said 'bye' and that was the last we heard of him for a couple of years. he came back once asking to see her but when I met him to talk he showed no interest in how she was actually doing or what she wanted and would make no commitment to staying in her life so I said no. Unfortunately he came back again about 4 years ago with his gf now his wife (I really like her btw and if it wasn't for her I'd prob have never let him have contact!) and a small baby, he said they were now settled in Andover (just over an hr away) with a mortgage, regular jobs etc and really wanted her to be part of their life. I agreed and they began seeing her once a month again. However after a few months they announced they were moving a 4hr drive away. After a few more months they told me he had had to take a job in kuwait on a 3 months on/3 months off basis so would only be able to see her every few months. And then christmas 2 years ago the wife told me that her and their dd were moving out to Kuwait to live with him with no plans of returning, not even for hols. My dd has been so fucked up by all this, she talks to him on skype intermittently, he is a little more interested now shes older and more fun and less work (or so he thinks) and is actually planning on taking her camping for a week in Devon this July. But her confidence and sense of security has been so badly affected by him coming and going all her life, never knowing when hes gonna be there or not. I really really wish I had never let him back in. He also did the 'one day she'll come find me and I'll tell her you wouldn't let me see her'. I thought she deserved to have her dad in her life and he deserved the chance to be there for her. Turns out he didn't, he's much too selfish and I should have known this really. She'd be better off without him but its too late now, I just have to be there for dd to pick up the pieces every time he lets her down.

Sorry, got a bit carried away there, he's really pissing me off at the moment so I'm venting slightly too but the main aim of me starting this post was to say that, as hard as it is to make the decision to cut him out her life, its a lot easier than picking up the pieces everytime he lets her down and messes with her head. Some men really don't deserve to be dads.

Lol, Button My dp actually suggested Madison before we knew we were having a boy, I tried very nicely to say no I didn't really like it (he doesn't suggest much so I don't like to knock his suggestions too badly or he gives up trying!) but my first thought was 'chavvy'!!

I do think its regional though, what names are chavvy where iyswim, and I suspect a couple of them names on are maybe list could be considered so!

Oh and Fab, I think Ophelia is a really beautiful, timeless name. Unusual without being weird or wacky and I really can't see it being a name someone would be teased over.

Pesha he sounds like his double! I also have visions of her having to contact him on Skype and feeling abandoned. He was similar to his ex in that he had to keep in contact after their split, not because he wanted her back, but because he didn't want her to move on. She's told me he's a lying, self absorbed fucktard and I should have listened earlier on. Especially as he was still emailing her and even skyped her from my house 2 days before Xmas for over an hour, telling her how much he missed her and loved her (apparently what he says to all of his friends and I had to deal with it!). She had to block him on line because he was just rubbing her nose in it. No smoke without fire and all that!

Well, I've got a handyman coming over at lunch to look into putting shelves up in her room, a new kitchen worktop and boxing in my washing machine:) Nice to feel that something positive can come of the day.

Oh and i'm also sorry if anyone has a Maddison or Pixie. Just not my taste x

"them names on are maybe list"

I am so ashamed!

The names on our maybe list.

I blame pg brain. Or possibly ds2 talking to me about Mickey mouse. Anything really other than my own stupidity!!

I think you're right - there's a huge regional impact on names and how they are perceived. And I'm sorry your ex is such a berk, Pesha.

Hindsight is a fabulous thing! I look back on my relationship with xp and I really can't understand why I was with him at all. My ex before him was violent and controlling but I still remember the good side of him and why I was with him. With dd's dad I look back and cringe! TBH I think he was a rebound thing after the controlling, older bf; he was immature younger, easy going and generally the complete opposite to the first one. I didn't see that at the time. I wish dd could have had a better dad but obviously I wouldn't have her without having been with him so I'm glad I was. But she is the only positive thing about it.

Hey,

I'm 24+5 in mansfield - due 14th July with my first, still got a bit of a double bump - due to having padding round my middle - about a cm of fat as my mw kindly pointed out when she measured me last week!

Having read through the thread sorry to hear so many are suffereing with ailments and exs.

i feel im kind of lucky - dp is kind of a pain in the arse - as in doesnt think about helping me out etc etc but hes not being a complete arse!

am feeling a bit worried that we're not involving grandparents enough. my mums got us the travel system but my dad and dps parents havent really got involved apart from helping with the house. its that i dont want them to but my mum jumped up and down and said she wanted to get the pushchair - no one else has so we've bought the essentials eg steraliser, cot - stuff we cant do without.....not bothered with clothes so far as I'm sure we'll get loads from everyone.

Will keep an eye on this thread from now on!

Missed your post Button, thank you , so am I!!

Off to drs with ds2 soon. He's had a cough at night for some time now, saw the dr a few weeks ago and she gave us some antibiotics to see if they worked but they didn't. Then yesterday we were at a family party and he was running around outside and ended up having what was fairly clearly a full on asthma attack I had suspected asthma and he has ezcema, he had it quite bad when he was younger but only a bit now, and there is a big family history on both sides of ezcema/hayfever/asthma so is no huge surprise I guess but still not nice. Was so sad to see him racing around having so much fun one minute and then coughing and wheezing and struggling for breath in my arms the next and I hated feeling so powerless.

I bf dd and ds1 for 6 months then 8 months but with the odd bit of formula too and they are both fine. DS2 I bf exclusively for 6 months and then didn't stop till he was gone 2 and somehow he's the one with the problems!! ALthough I do think that perhaps if I hadn't done that he may have been worse. Certainly the ezcema didn't start until he started having the odd cow's milk bottle when he was nearly 1.

DS1 has his referral through for an assessment with the integrated therapy service. Not sure if I said on here that we suspect he may have slight dyspraxia or similar. I knew the school were assessing him but somehow getting this letter through makes it seem a bit more real and serious. Its good that they are doing something and very good that I haven't had to fight for this but suddenly getting the letter through was a bit upsetting. I think a little part of me hoped that when I went to the school with my concerns they would say don't be daft he's fine and it would be me being a paranoid mummy. Now its clearly not just me who thinks theres things not right and thats a little bit scary and upsetting.

And bloody pg hormones don't help as now sitting here thinking about it all I'm fighting off tears and overcome with a desperate urge to run into school and grab him and bring him home!!

Welcome Lynzi! We're a pretty friendly bunch here.

Offers of presents have been decidedly lacking this time. I guess by #4 everyone's got a bit fed up with buying stuff

I have a similar situation in some ways Pesha. I managed 8 wks exclusive and another 2-3 mixed with dd1 who is rarely if ever ill. Dd2 I fed exclusively for 6 months. Ds I fed myself for 5 weeks and 3 days before 'giving up'.

And guess what? Dd2 has eczema, asthma, IBS (though not IBS as children don't get IBS apparently ) and cannot tolerate wholewheat in any form.

I used to wonder all the time why is was that way round. The along came ds who is exactly the same minus the asthma.

Hope you get some sense out of them!

Hi Lynzi - am at the nerve of your mw pointing out your bit of fat!! I always find they like to comment on my stretch marks, as if I hadn't noticed them covering almost my entire stomach

And yes, as Button said, no offers of people buying things this time (also #4)! Although I do have a friend who keeps giving me her ds3's old baby clothes as she comes across them!

Oh who was it earlier said about forgetting what week they were in? I only remember as I have a thing on facebook that comes up every thursday and tells me how many weeks I am and an app on my iPhone that pings every thurs to tell me I have 'entered a new week of pregnancy'!!

Thank you Button. It is strange isn't it? Ds2 turned out to be intolerant to cow's milk so had to have goat's milk until earlier this year, and still if he has too much milk he'll have a little bit of a flare up of his ezcema. So for that I am glad I bf as formula prob would have triggered it much earlier. I have to believe it helped because I struggle with my milk supply so he fed constantly and bfing him was a real struggle, if I even begin to think that it was a all a waste of time I shall go mad!!!

I have a new favourite word, Fucktard. Or should it be fuckturd?
Both of you will do (and carry on doing) the best you can with those arseholes. Ophelia is one of my most favourite names and I had many an argument over whether to cal DD it. Pixie and Maddison are, I'm sorry awful -perhaps from overusage?

I lost the trousers at the last moment, but then won a summer top. I have now bid on a jacket and a pair of white (I know) linen trews and another top and some jeans

UPDATE: I lost the white trousers, I got there just a fraction too late
Now I'll have to have another trawl through the pages...

I had the July? and 'are you sure it's not twins?' again this morning.
fuckofffuckofffuckoff