The PESH Deli - Going MAD for Hallowe'en.

[Scorpette]

Tales from the dark side, from a coven of evil hags obsessed with ghoulies. Hellish talk of FJ and puke will chill you to the marrow. Unspeakable horrors from our uterine crypts do creep - but thankfully, we're also having baybees...

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.

UPDIFFED

silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee).
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy).
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6.
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14.
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy).
maswera, jungle hottie, due December 11.
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25.
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 January.
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2.
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24.
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Muser, will she ever stop puking?, due February 27.
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12.
Casserole, living on hula hoops, due April 10.
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan.
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 21 May.
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 3 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.

So come on in and leave your broomsticks and pointy hats by the door!

Oh I love Sing Star but I seem to need a bottle of wine before I get up there and this clearly affects my performance.

How is this for role reversal - Mr C is cooking a big bol to stock up on freezer food and shouting at TV X Factor while sporting his PJs. I heart him I do.

Gavin Henson would get it non? I mean, not interested at all in his conversation (or lack of it) but he has a fit bod. Although saying that, a bloke who shaves his legs more than I do is slightly off putting...

Muse you are in that there London aren't you? Surely there is a corner shop near by for butter purchasing?

Gav Henson is a bit David Beckham. Nice to look at but don't open your mush as it ruins the illusion of male beauty and the perfick bod.

Alpine. I nearly fainted after sitting half in a jacuzzi for 5 minutes. Normally I could wallow in a jacuzzi quite happily for ages on end. I also don't run baths too hot for the same reason, as I did faint after a rather lovely hot bath when I was briefly and unsuccessfully diffed.

You may not see the risk involved, doesn't mean there isn't one. And if 5 minutes with my legs in a jacuzzi nearly has me fainting, I think I'll avoid. And warn others to maybe be a bit careful, just in case they are Fainty McFaint like me. Sod all to do with the baby mind, I think a bath hot enough to do any harm to the baby would probably kill the person getting into it!

Okie yeah I went and bought butter. Cake is now in the oven. Cake mix tastes good. Oh yes, I am reckless cake mix eater.

I do too have hot water. In the kettle and in the shower

As you were.

Ooh cake mix is just lush. And I'm going to avoid the hot tub as I can't stand the bath as hot as I could prediff.

aries - you have hot water in the two most important placeds...

Hot water in the kettle? Make us a cup of tea Aries!

Aries Do you place your foof in the kettle?

Muser Yes, I read you'd fainted - obviously they don't mix well with you personally - but it's not a one-size-fits-all absolute (imo). I think we're told it's a risk in the same way we (were last month) told alcohol is a risk. They don't believe we can use our noggins and self-regulate!

When I went to the spa it was full of preggos waddling from pool to jacuzzi to pool etc. and naked octogenarians. :( Do not care where they were waddling to - averted gaze to such an extent got crick in neck.

Nobody wants to see a naked wrinkly ol'fella!!

Surely the nature of most risks is that they are not a one size fits all absolute? And it is usually helpful to know what the risk might be, so you can make a judgement.

The risk of hot jacuzzis/saunas/etc is fainting (not baby melting). It will not be a risk for everyone. But it will be for some, and its a risk because you're pregnant. Personally I'd rather be aware of the risk, so I can prepare for it. Hence my half in the jacuzzi thing, as I was waiting to see how it made me feel.

I would rather not be made to feel like a paranoid "won't someone please think of the baybeeeeees" type for passing on information that will help someone else make an informed decision.

I'm glad you shared your experience Muse, because I'd never heard of anyone having any ill effects before and I did think perhaps it was just one of those things They make up to annoy us. Now I know better!

I didn't use a sauna or a steam room when diffed last time, but I did use the jacuzzi a couple of times with no ill effects. So I'd have probably told anyone else to go for it... but now I'd say sit on the edge, dangle your feet in, see how that makes you feel before going any further, and don't do it on your own.

Unless there's a naked octogenarian in there. Then Just Don't Do It. But I don't think that's diff-specific

You're not Muse, course you're not. What about hot water bottles? Anyone any info? Seeing as you have them right next to your baybee and they're very, very hot.

Hot water bottles are clearly banned for life as the stopper could work its way out or they might burst and then you might DIE. Similarly those hot blankets for your bed (what are they called? My mind has gone blank) are banned because they could CATCH FIRE and kill you while you sleep.

Fuck. I thought you were being serious and I have already binned my hot water bottle and electric blanket . You caaah.

Aries Actually here hot water bottles are banned for baybees, instead they sell advise us to use metal flasks - not unlike a Thermos which are supposed not to burst open leaving baybee lying in boiling hot/freezing cold wet patch all night. I did use one in hospital the first couple of days because even though it was in the late-30s baybees are crap at staying warm. This winter if the baybee gets cold I'll use the grown-up's method and simply throw another dog on the bed.

Alpine I like the throw another dog on approach. I could use the cats in a similar way. Although everyone knows the cats smell milk on the baby and sit on its face. Or something.

It was a cartoon in Clarissa Dickson-Wright's autobiography I think. A well-to-do couple in bed and she says "I'm cold darling, throw another dog on the bed". I'd love to get it printed and framed.

But how do you fit the baybee in the flask? Mine would never have fitted, he was very long. Can you get a connector kit and put two flasks together?

I heard that cats lie on the baybee's chest and suck the air out of its lungs.

cass Preemie's are very small and squishable.

Crossed wires MountainMare. I meant for me while my so far fictitious baybee is in my tumtum.

God will the cat kill my baybee too? Because if it's a choice, I know which one MrA will choose.

Aries well... don't stick it up your foof. Honestly, do I have to explain everything to you? I dread to think how you're going to cope when you have to boil your nipples for 5 minutes to sterilise them between feeds. :(

Yep, cats kill baybees. One of my colleagues had all 3 send to a rescue centre when she was diffed. 1 was v old and we all knew it would not be re-housed. Child turns 18 months - "mum, canni havva cat?".

Note to self - stop sticking HWB up foof. You mean if I clutch it to my tum, it won't boil the amniotic fluid?

When we got a kitten Cat turned into a moody bitch from hell. How she will cope with a small, screaming, smelly creature I don't know. Oh well. We're certainly not giving her away. It would break all our hearts. Sorry for chatting on here, despite lack of diffage. Palais is v quiet this morning, except for lovely Cass.

Oh yes, the nipple boiling. That does smart the first couple of times. But, you know, if what's you've gotta do, if you really love your child. Rierie you could start now and toughen them up in advance?

Mr Stew was a bit mental about our cats last time. We bought about 4 different cat nets, none of which fitted the moses basket OR the cot. And the cats didn't go anywhere near the baby, anyway.

My friend was given a cat net. The cats loved it, look a cat hammock!

She removed the cat net. Cats went nowhere near the baby. Why a cat would be interested in a creature that makes very loud noises constantly is something nobody has ever been able to explain properly to me. I fully expect my cats to hide behind the sofa forever more.