Please or to access all these features

Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Support For Anyone After The Loss Of A Parent.

985 replies

Mummylin · 06/04/2020 11:59

I hope this thread will be as supportive and welcoming as we have had in the past. It is so heartwarming to see the support you all give each other. Wishing you all well. 💐

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
Mummylin · 20/04/2020 08:33

Glitterb. You too are just in the early devastating stage. At times it's seems impossible to carry on, but somehow we do. We are all stronger than we could possibly imagine. You have had a double blow which must of left you reeling.
I think for me, part of it is that your life has changed forever, we never can go back ,daily phone calls, a laugh together, a bit of gossip to share and luckily for me, mum would come on our holidays abroad too, so I do have such lovely memories. Never to be had again.
It truly is a heartbreaking time. I hope you too have support around you, I'm sure it's much needed. 💐

OP posts:
Mummylin · 20/04/2020 08:38

Thankyou Richlyfruited I am ok just sad that our crem is closed for anyone wanting to take flowers. It's unheard of for me not to take flowers today.
But others have it so much worse at the present time. As if everyone dosent have enough to deal with at this present time.
Yes the unexpectedness can knock you for six can't it. I will never get over it, you just think, " how " how has that happened.
Have you coped ok in your circumstances? 💐

OP posts:
Richlyfruited · 20/04/2020 21:06

It's really sad that you can't take flowers @Mummylin I hope you can when the restrictions are finally lifted Flowers

I'm just finding myself missing dad more every day as it starts to sink in. I think the initial stress of the Covid situation has been a diversion but clearing out his flat has been really, really hard. There are so many things I want to ask him about and now I can't. He lived quite close to us so I keep expecting him to pop over at any moment Sad

Lostintheuniverse · 20/04/2020 21:35

Just joining this thread after losing a parent and a parent in law this year. Sorry for everyone who has lost someone.
My parent died a few weeks ago and I want to remember all the good times, but it's difficult not to remember the end times at the moment.
My remaining parent is not coping well with being in isolation either as they are normally very sociable and now have noone. Phone calls help to some extent, but it is not the same.
Take care @Mummylin, hope things start to get easier.

IcaMorgan · 20/04/2020 22:53

My mother died on 2nd March

She was rushed into hospital on 5th Feb with respiratory failure, after a week of doing nothing they decided to find out why she had had a raised heartbeat for the whole time she had been in. They did a scan which showed fluid around her heart and did an urgent operation to drain it, they rang me to tell me and gave me 30 seconds to decide wether to resuscitate or not. A few days later they did a PET scan which showed a tumour which they said was possibly lymphoma. They kept changing their minds about how to do a biopsy which was upsetting her all the time. Mother didn’t eat the whole time she was in but they wouldn’t tube feed her or anything as she was compos mentis in their eyes.

Finally on the 2nd March me and her partner had a meeting with the consultant who informed us she had stage 4 small cell lung cancer and had weeks to live. We sat with mother til 5pm then had a drink in the pub next door so I could calm her partner down. I then headed to my local pub to meet my husband, I hadn’t even got half way down my first drink when the hospital called to say she had deteriorated and to get there immediately.

It took me 3 buses to get there and I was almost there (2 stops away) when my cousin rang me to ask if I was ok as my brother had told her mother had died. I told her there was a mistake as I would have been told if she had died. Just as the bus pulled up outside the hospital mother’s partner rang and I just said she’s gone hasn’t she and he said yes.

I am still very angry with my brother (and everyone else involved except my cousin) about how I found out. The hospital told a friend who had arrived to visit and he told my brother who Facebook messaged my cousin. Mother’s partner got to the hospital over half an hour before he rang me to tell me. No one except my cousin even thought to tell me for 45 mins so I was the last to know

I’ve spent the 7 weeks since trying to sort out the complete financial mess she left as well as her house (she had become a hoarder and it took 5 hours just to clear her computer desk). I’ve had to look after her partner (he’s on the phone 10-20 times a day and now I dread the phone ringing).

I’ve not had time to grieve at all and everyone kept saying I will grieve after the funeral except due to the lockdown (myself, her partner and my brother are all on the 12 week lockdown) there was no funeral. We had to do a direct cremation and will (possibly) have a memorial in the future.

6 weeks after mother died my brothers dad died and he didn’t even bother to tell me about that and I had to read it on Facebook (his excuse was he didn’t know I knew him). On the phone all my brother could go on about was how myself and his other sister (by his dad) had been strong for him over mother and now he would be strong for his sister over their dad. Not once has he mentioned being strong for me

Mummylin · 20/04/2020 23:47

So sorry Ica what an awful lot you have had to go through. I can only wish that sometime in the future you will be in a much happier situation. You have gone though a terrible time and it sounds like you haven't been treated as well as you should of been.
I hope that in the coming months life will improve for you and that gradually the upset and hurt that you are feeling now, will fade. You can and I'm sure will,be happy again.💐💐

OP posts:
RoseForRembrance · 21/04/2020 11:22

Sending Flowers to you all.

Dad's 'funeral' is all planned and organised and I've come to accept that it can't be how we wanted. I'm also starting notes of what I want for the celebration of life service later in the year, so this funeral doesn't seem so wrong.
I'm settling into some sort of routine. My house has never been so clean and tidy! Seeing the neat and cleanness of everywhere is giving me a sense of calm.
As the day of the funeral is drawing closer I'm struggling with sleeping more. I have several phone calls I need to make to let distant family know of the arrangements although they can't attend. But I'm avoiding them as I know I will get very upset.
I haven't even started the paperwork the solicitor wants, but I don't think he's in any hurry as he's working from home and the lockdown isn't making it easy for him either.
Once the funeral is over I know I will be expected to start thinking about going back to work, which I'm really struggling with. Work have been great so far, but I know they need me back and there is a limit to how much compassionate leave I can have.

Richlyfruited · 24/04/2020 15:28

@Glitterb - I hope all went ok today Flowers thinking of you

So sorry for your loss @IcaMorgan it sounds like you didn't have much time to process it all Sad

Glitterb · 25/04/2020 12:11

@Richlyfruited & @Nottoday1
Thank you for your messages, yesterday went all to plan, she had the most beautiful flowers but today I feel incredibly sad, probably the most sad I’ve felt. Maybe its the reality that she really has completely gone now or that fact people will just get on with their lives now and forget her? I wasn’t quite prepared for this feeling!

Geppili · 26/04/2020 02:18

Can I join? Feeling unable to sleep. My DF died in hospital of respiratory failure about an hour ago. I feel so sad but also am plagued by terrible insomnia. I lost my DM four years ago and I am pathetically daunted by the thought of grieving in lockdown with my kids.

Cheesypea · 26/04/2020 02:57

Geppili
I'm so sorry for your loss is there anyone with you now? I lost my mum on Thursday, she was such a big personality, it's just too quiet without her.

Geppili · 26/04/2020 12:48

Thanks so much Cheesypea. I finally managed to get to sleep. It's the most beautiful spring day here. I am so sorry for your loss.

Cheesypea · 26/04/2020 14:30

Good I'm glad you got some sleep. I dropped off just after I messaged you. It's beautiful here too. I went for a walk and had a cry. It's all so raw.

Geppili · 26/04/2020 22:47

Hey Cheesypea I love your name btw! It was so nice to see your message. Today has been full of phone calls. Today feels like it has lasted a week. Tell me about your mum if it helps. My DF has a really huge smile and a great sense of humour. My parents divorced and he left very suddenly with no explanation and I grieved him hard, while adjusting to a 'new daddy'. My mother alienated us from him. But I found him again after college and we became very close. It feels like losing him again.

Geppili · 26/04/2020 22:48

I am really frightened of insomnia again.

Cheesypea · 26/04/2020 23:00

Thanks so much, its comforting to speak to somewone in the same position as me. My mum was a hilarious, cutting, matriarch. She worked as a nurse her whole career and helped countless people. Ive been glued to the phone too. The insomnia was worse the first night. Hopefully you will be so exhausted tonight youll go out like a light.

Cheesypea · 26/04/2020 23:01

Night night my dear.

Jakadaal · 26/04/2020 23:10

Another newbie here - my lovely old dad died on Easter Monday in his care home with his fabulous carers but sadly no family by his side.

Tonight is the eve of his burial service - No church, 8 mourners only (we are a big extended family) I'm not sure I will sleep much tonight. I have an ache and a pressure in my chest that hurts so much but I can't seem to cry and let it go.

Not sure why I'm posting ....

Cheesypea · 26/04/2020 23:16

You will cry jack. It sounds so hard not being able to say goodbye to him.

missingmydad · 26/04/2020 23:22

You will cry just not when you expect it 💐

Hidethesausage · 26/04/2020 23:51

@RichlyFruited it was the same for me- my Dads tenancy ended within 1 week so had to vacate by last Friday. I've just ended up bundling everything into boxes and shoving it all in he garage for when I can find the space and strength to go through it all. When my Mum died in hospital, it was 2am and we were given an hour before being firmly but politely asked to pack her stuff and leave. Had to gather up cards, flowers and personal belongings and just bundle ourselves in the car and go home. So brutal. @Nottoday I'm so sorry for your loss. You will be in shock- be kind to yourself.💐

Hidethesausage · 27/04/2020 00:04

@Geppili @Cheesypea hand holding through the night

Geppili · 27/04/2020 00:33

Hidethesausage thank you

Richlyfruited · 27/04/2020 22:37

Sending Flowers to the newbies joining the thread. I'm really sorry you are here...

I've found myself crying when I'm not expecting to - suddenly found myself in floods of tears walking down the street yesterday! At least being at home a lot does allow a bit more space and time for these moments of grief.

Clearing out dad's flat was really tough. I've ended up with a lot of his things at mine too @Hidethesausage I'm really shocked you only got a week to clear out your mum's council place Sad As if things aren't hard enough having to work around the lockdown situation is super difficult.

Take care of yourselves everyone x

Jakadaal · 28/04/2020 00:16

Well today was my darling DFs burial service. As it turned out it was beautiful despite all of the lockdown restrictions - in fact it was small, intimate and personal. Now the new normal starts. ThanksThanksThanks to everyone tonight

Swipe left for the next trending thread