''Even the smallest of footprints have the power to leave an everlasting imprint on the Earth'' Remembering with love our darling children

[Whatevertheweather]

Remembering not only what we have lost but what our darling children have given to us.

A new 'safe haven' thread. Thank you Chip for our last one which filled up in just a month. A sure sign of lots of tears, smiles and wonderful support.

All our children have taught us something whether they were born sleeping, lived just a little while, weeks, months or years. Here are mine:

Never ever take anything for granted, life can change very quickly.
Listen to yourself; your instincts will nearly always be right.
That it is possible to function seemingly normally with a broken heart.
That I have a wonderful relationship that can withstand the hardest of times.
That love and support can come from the most unexpected sources.
That I have a lot of very lovely friends, new and old.
That my family is amazing.
That no matter what it is impossible not to smile and laugh with my beautiful Katie around.
That a rainbow can provide hope in the darkest of times.
That there will be good days and bad days
That I love my children more than I ever thought possible.

For all our darling children xxx

chip that is so lovely, sitting here crying as well.
DD1 asked this morning to get Sterre's memory box down and have a look at her pictures.
And then it dawned on me, the scan pictures I have of Sterre, are 9 weeks and 12 weeks, and I'm 10 weeks pregnant now, this little one is as big as the last times I saw her alive on a screen... :(

Oh Chip that is the most beautiful poem. How perfect

Blue.
In Heaven, I'm sure Sterre is a big healthy smiling baby and has captured the hearts of all the other angels.

chip what a wonderful poem. Thank you for sharing it with us.

chip that poem is really beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it.x

chip that's a really beautiful poem.

One that I love is:

Do not stand at my grave and weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

Mary Elizabeth Frye

It was read at my nan's funeral and I've always remembered it since. It's not everyone's cup of tea but I like the wording.

blue (hugs) must be hard for you right now xx

I hope everyone is having a peaceful evening, seems a lot of us are struggling at the moment xx

Trying so hard to stay calm, sigh. I think I need to hide a thread or two. Trying to be helpful also but...

Cheese, I looked at that thread. Just hide it. You have done your best and it's only upsetting you.

Think I'll just try to avoid things from now on, having a really bad night, not sure what else to say. Thanks chip x

Oh god I'm so scared. And I miss my little Erin so much right now. This time 8 months ago I woke up with no idea that 12 hours later my whole world would fall apart.

whatever Erin is nestled safe in your heart. I hope the scan allays your fears today. It is so, so hard. We are here for you. xx

wtw thinking of you and your lovely family and praying that all will be well! your little Erin is looking after her baby brother or sister! x

Also thinking of you and Tamsin Rainbow today, tami.

Whatever, thinking of you today xx

Also thinking of little Tamsin xx

Whatever I am thinking of you today, on this most bittersweet of days (((hugs))). Hoping to hear some exciting news from you later xx

Miasmummy & chip* Thanks for remembering Tamsin. It doesn't seem possible that it's now 6 months that her little heart stopped beating. I've booked into get my haircut again but it's not been cut since December, so needs it, and will hopefully cheer me up. Feel guilty though, asked for a graduate stylist, instead of the one who did it before, just to save £20, hope the other lady isn't upset by that. I'm still very low though, damned stupid life!

cheese I think I know the thread you mean. I looked at it the other day, I'm so sorry (((hugs))). I've had people argue with me on threads on reduced fetal movements. Most people reassure them, or tell them to lie down, eat chocolate, that the baby has run out of room etc. It makes me mad that so many people advise faffing around and wasting time. I'd rather panic women - better that than to have one woman, whose baby is in trouble, waste precious time - listening to people whose babies were 'fine'... grrr... xx

Tami big hugs for you my friend! It does seem like an apt day to be sad, what horrible weather out there! I think all our angels are having fun splashing in puddles though!

Blue Thank you xx I'm sure they are having lots of fun xx

Hello Have had scan this morning - all looks well so far (huge sigh of relief) she was being a little monkey though and wouldn't stay still but they got everything they needed in the end. Yes that's right I said she we are having another little girl What a very very bittersweet day. Feeling totally all over the place.

Tami thinking of you and Tamsin today. Our little 25th babies I hope they are playing together xxx

whatever oh, that's brilliant news!! You have been in my thoughts all day, wondering how the scan went. Completely understand your emotions being all over the place. I know it doesn't change the sad thoughts about Erin, but it is wonderful news in its own right.

tami sending rainbow thoughts to you on this changeable day - rain and sunshine, torrential showers and racing clouds. There is a rainbow in there somewhere, even if we can't always see it. I promise you, it's there. And that's where all our children are playing.

Feeling very heavy inside today. I was in Monsoon, looking at possible dresses for a July wedding I am going to, and all the summer clothing for little girls was on the same floor. It hit me so forcefully that I can't enjoy choosing Mia's summer outfits - and then a song with the words came on "I love you more every day" How true. A bit of a sob fest on the way home. And just spoke to our lawyer, it's been decided that a pre-inquest review is needed next month. Our lawyer thinks we need two weeks to ensure all the facts are brought out, whereas the coroner only thinks two days... I don't know what I want, longer will be harder, but I don't want to walk away knowing that there was more information that had not be properly revealed.

This was posted on my Mia thread yesterday. I think it's quite beautiful, and hope it might ease some of the pain and hurt which is with so many of us at the moment.

This song of mine will wind its music around you,
my child, like the fond arms of love.

The song of mine will touch your forehead
like a kiss of blessing.

When you are alone it will sit by your side and
whisper in your ear, when you are in the crowd
it will fence you about with aloofness.

My song will be like a pair of wings to your dreams,
it will transport your heart to the verge of the unknown.

It will be like the faithful star overhead
when dark night is over your road.

My song will sit in the pupils of your eyes,
and will carry your sight into the heart of things.

And when my voice is silenced in death,
my song will speak in your living heart.

~Rabindranath Tagore

Oh, that is beautiful, Mias. Isn't that also the lady who wrote another poem that MrsDeVere used to post? I'll see if I can find it.

Just wanted to drop in and introduce myself to you lovely ladies.

Lost my darling beautiful Elsie at 41 weeks... It will be 10 weeks on saturday. Had the most beautiful, empowering and peaceful birth and cut her cord... Then slept with her and my husband till dawn until we said our goodbyes. Perfect in every way, just not destined for this world... She will always be in our hearts and we will always know she is part of us. The birth was her gift to me, it was incredible and though I am not a mother now I was for 9 months and felt the power of birth so many miss out on. I do feel blessed in that way. She was so cute too.

I am 40 now (goodness where did that time go?) and it's just my husband and I now again... Hope maybe to try again, not sure if we are brave enough.

Anyway what I have learnt is that no one know how long they have with their loved ones... So cherish the time you have, I never saw my baby's eyes but she was still part of us and we shared some great times together in utero.

Wishing you all here strength and lighter times... They are out there :)

X