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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Original poster

I just want to kill him today

784 replies

Fifyfomum · 28/03/2014 07:45

I am so annoyed with my son, he is 3.8 and has shown absolutely no sign of 'wanting to potty train' which EVERYBODY told me would 'happen naturally' when he turned three.

He is now sat on the potty, he has been there for around an hour and it looks like he will be there for an hour more. Every time he stands up he cries because he is busting for the loo and I sit him back down again but he refuses REFUSES to wee on the potty.

I need to potty train him before school it is getting RIDICULOUS and when I talk to him now he is putting on this 'baby' voice and sticking his tongue out around his teeth so he can't talk properly and I am SO ANGRY with him.

Why WHY won't he just use the potty? All his friends at nursery use the potty, he knows what to do because we have been going through this ridiculous process day after day trying to get him to bloody urinate out of a nappy.

ARRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH

OP posts:
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YouStayClassySanDiego · 29/03/2014 21:18

OP why didn't you engage such simple techniques giving him space and letting him choose when to use the pot for a wee?

If you did use them what is the change that has flicked in his interest?

Perhaps a realisation on your part that being a seething, brooding mare of a mother was not helping him?

HappyBungleBear · 29/03/2014 21:19

FIFYFOMUM... why lots of fear... why should he be scared?

whattowatchnext · 29/03/2014 21:21

OK, I have probably breached some unwritten MN code here but have seen some of your other posts Fify. You really do sound very unhappy and you definitely need help. Please ask your GP to refer you for counselling or look at your medication because you are not coping and need to get some support in RL. I am sorry you are having such a tough time, please try not to focus your anger on your child though as it's not his fault.

YouStayClassySanDiego · 29/03/2014 21:24

Lots of x posts.

I'm glad some others have connected OP with other threads whuch have been contentious.

BoulevardOfBrokenSleep · 29/03/2014 21:28

I'm thinking the 'lots of fear' was sarcasm:

"He came up to tell me he'd done a wee and that he needed a choccy button!

Lots of fear, of course Hmm"

HappyBungleBear · 29/03/2014 21:32

Bored of this now. There should be no fear. It'll never happen if he's scared. Actually if OP were my mum I reckon I'd happily poo and wee on her carpets forever. Night.

EverythingCounts · 29/03/2014 21:42

You said yourself, OP, " I went out to have a coffee with a friend and that is what he'd done". Your own words, no-one else's.

whattowatchnext You make a good point. OP needs help.

Original poster
Fifyfomum · 29/03/2014 21:42

Other names? I've had the same name here for years you have lost me now.

The fear was sarcasm...

Anyway thanks for the tips and eyelet hope to stay in touch.

I think we can manage now.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fifyfomum · 29/03/2014 21:44

Sigh. We were all in the house

I went upstairs to tidy

Boy followed me up and demanded choccy

Husband was in loft

I went out with the dog

Husband told me (on return) that boy demanding choccy had been because he went in the potty alone.

OP posts:
YouStayClassySanDiego · 29/03/2014 21:50

Same name for years?

Of course Smile.

FlumpieWumpie · 29/03/2014 21:50

Why would you say "fear" when you meant "sarcastic"? They are completely different.

YouStayClassySanDiego · 29/03/2014 22:07

On this thread the only deletions from HQ refer solely to the OP, just commenting in thatWink

The sudden and almost miraculous change in the little boy's ability to use the pot since yesterday is well.........startling.

Enjoyingmycoffee · 29/03/2014 22:14

Ok, I totally disagree with the behaviour of the OP, and have explicitly said that.

But c'mon!! Enough with the focus on her comment about the choccy buttons. It was clearly sarcasm. Flumpie, you've managed misunderstand both the posts!

AlpacaYourThings · 29/03/2014 22:15

One of the most bizarre threads I have ever read.

NessaWH123 · 29/03/2014 22:30

truely wierd and very distrurbing and rather worrying...

Original poster
Fifyfomum · 29/03/2014 22:45

I also haven't reported any posts. I am unaware of any deletions and will just give as good as I get! If I were found to report posts they would be the ones claiming I am someone else or lying about me making reports I haven't made!

I really just want to talk about potty training. I will ignore further bullshit - oops another swear word.

OP posts:
DettaWalker · 29/03/2014 23:23

@fifyfomum
Don't know if its been said before, but when it comes to being ready & toilet training - my Japanese MIL was surprised we didn't start toilet training with our DS "until he was ready". In Japan they start toilet training at 2... doesn't seem to hurt them.
They even make anime about it:

I hope things work out for you soon, I can't even imagine what it must be like to change the same poopy nappies for nearly 4 years. I know I wouldn't be happy about it.

EverythingCounts · 30/03/2014 00:24

Still doesn't make any sense. You've clearly gone out (obviously that's not an issue or something to feel bad about) but why you then felt the need to make out you didn't go without the kids I don't know - you clearly did since you talk of your husband telling you, on return, your son had used the potty. But never mind, don't bother answering, the next reply, if there is one, won't make any more sense and I don't expect it to.

However, OP, if you cast your eye back up the thread you will be able to see that some of your posts have in fact been deleted. I didn't report these, but only because I had other things to do - I'm glad someone else saved me the trouble. Hopefully MN have emailed to ask you to wind your neck in by now.

You actually want to talk about potty training only with people who agree with you completely. Bad luck I'm afraid, people are allowed to disagree or criticise and will do so. Get over it.

SolomanDaisy · 30/03/2014 08:06

Feel free to report me for suggesting you previously posted in another name. I would be utterly amazed if MNHQ didn't see that you are that poster. You and your family need help, you seem unable to judge what normal reactions for you or your child are.

YoungBodyOldHead · 30/03/2014 11:12

My god!

Only got to page nine, and it is very clear that what really needs training is that disgusting toilet mouth of yours!

mrsstardust · 30/03/2014 16:51

this whole thread is sickening. the OP is an obvious troll and hasn't responded to anyone given real advice.

MostWicked · 30/03/2014 17:29

In Japan they start toilet training at 2... doesn't seem to hurt them

Lots of people start potty training younger. However, it takes much, much longer and they often don't completely master it until about 4 anyway. It saves on nappies, but not on washing and mopping up. It also makes a huge difference if the number of children is smaller (which Japanese families generally are) and at least one parent is not going out to work, so they can be on top of the training all of the time.
There are lots of people who "train" from under a year, but it really depends if you just want to be catching wee or toilet training.

hellymelly · 30/03/2014 19:09

My Mum potty trained us at less than 2, we were dry by two, definitely. Everyone did that in the 60s, washable nappies were a pain with no automatic machines so mothers trained babies really early. My dds were ready before two and dry night and day at 24 months , the whole process took under a week, with two accidents each past then, both in the daytime. I have girls, and I have heard they are ready earlier, but my personl feeling is that now people tend to leave it too late, and miss the window a bit.

nicename · 30/03/2014 19:10

A mongolian friend started 'training' at just a few months old, holding the baby over a potty. Not sure if this is a local custom of a pfb thing!

duchesse · 30/03/2014 19:11

helly- so did mine (1968 baby) and I can tell you I was far from reliable even at 8. Some children just mature those nerve pathways a lot later than others.