Terrible Twos!!! Feel like calling in Supper Nanny????!!

[Reece]

Ds (2.8) has been difficult since DS2 came along 16 months ago but in the last month his tantrums,tears and stubborness have esculated big time.

Typical morning before 9am - Jumps out cot (refuses to sleep in bed)refuses to use potty, refuses to take off pull-up and PJ's. When downstairs asks for weetabix, serve him with warm milk as asked and then refuses to eat it saying that he wants Special K instead. I say no because he had asked for Weetabix. He then proceeds to throw entire bowl of Weetabix on the floor and rant about Special K. I don't give in and try hard to ignore his tantrum. Still won't use potty, demands TV, I refuse until he uses potty and helps to get dressed and washed etc. He continues to rant and rave for 20 + mins. At this stage we are running late for playschool and DS2 is not washed and dressed etc etc.

I expect there are many of you out there that think this is just intermediate stuff but I just need some guidance on how to deal with it.. I feel myself raging inside but know that will make things worse. He is pushing and pushing me and I know I will burst at some stage.

Last night he refused to stay in his room, kept jumping out of the cot for about 2 hours screaming. He was running all over the house upstairs going through my room etc. I tried the quietly placing him back in bed again and again method (don't know what it's called) but he kept waking DS2. DH and I ended up giving up and going downstairs to leave him to it. i feel like locking him in his room.

How long does the terrible 2's last for? Do they have terrible 3's as well??? Parenting is extremely tiring and frustrating at the moment. I am not enjoying him and can't see any light at the end of the tunnel. Help!!

Everyone must have had a good day with lo's as no comments been posted in a while.
Not too bad here either.

lol. Keep your posts coming.
The sticker thing at bedtime sounds interesting. Let us know if you go for it and how you get on.

DS's face looks such a mess since his fall at the weekend. It has all scabbed over. Everytime I look at him I want to cuddle him. Except of course for when he is being bold.

He has calmed down a lot since last week, howevr he is still doing some naughty stuff such as yesterday he wacked DS2's head repeatedly with a plastic spade. He also pushes DS2 around but I have noticed this tends to occur around 4pm. Due to not having naps anymore he seems has a 'bold hour'. 4-5pm. Then his behaviour slowly improves again. This is normally when I am preparing their tea so its difficult to manage the tantrums and give DS1 any 1 on 1 attention.

He was also up at 1am and at my bedside
I am getting frustrated with this night waking as he is doing it at least once every night and it has been going on for a month. Why is he doing it? What is waking him up? I'm wondering if maybe he is doing a little wee in his sleep and that is waking him?! I am so tired. haven't had a good nights sleep (bar 1) in ages. I sooooo need a break and DH is still working all hours. I usually have kids in bed etc before he is home and then he rolls in and I have to do dinner. I get to sit down at about 1pm and thats without doing any ironing.

Ok rant over.

Sorry meant that I get to sit down at 10pm.

Arh you are very good FOM.
DH was great last night, he came in and actually once I'd got the boys to bed, told me to sit down and relax whilst he cooked the dinner. It was fab but as I sat down I realised that it doesn't happen that often.

To be fair to him he is normally very good. I was ranting this morning because I am just so tired all the time.

I refuse to cook on Fridays anymore so its takeaway night now DH cooks every now and then. I think the problem here is that I always feed the kids at about 5.30 as they are starving by then. I nibble a bit with them. Then I cook a fresh dinner from scratch dinner for DH and I to eat when kids are asleep. This time is important for us but then of course we are eating very late and after cleaning up (usually me) its even later.

I have been cooking things like Spag.Bol so that it can just be reheated so its easy then. Anything else like curry for instance...which the kids don't eat has to be cooked later as I don't often find the time in the day.(yes this is from scratch too). (don't anyone say get of MN then!MN is my salvation).

I mentioned to DH that I was worn out and that I was going to start cooking dinner earlier and plating his up. He pulled a face at this! His mum is of course THE BEST COOK in the world and always does amazing receipe meals! A plated up meal would never happen in that house. I think I am going to just have to mix it up a bit, some takeaways, some plated up meals for DH, some Spag.Bol. type meals that can be reheated nicely or DH cooks.

Now I have to put it into practice. Isn't it funny how easily we slip into habits and don't actually see the common sense of making our lives easier with a few small changes?! OK I will shut up now.

Reece I have the same problem with cooking two meals.

Lately I have been trying to push DS tea later to aorund 6pm and hope DH will be home so we can all eat together, but often he is not home in time.

I alwasy eat with DS so DH gets the plated up meal I'm afraid.

I make more effort at the weekends & DH appreciates that.

IMO he is lucky to get a meal cooked every night , but I don;t tell him that.

I try to get everything done before DS goes to bed so I can have an evening. I do the ironing at ngiht once a week in teh summer and no ironing in the winter as I will have tumble dried the stuff. DH ahs to do his own shirts.

So that leaves packed lunches and odd bits & bobs but nothing major.

I do the proper housework on Saturday morning while DH takes DS swimming, and keep on top of things during the week.

Oh no FOM! Sorry to hear that.Could your DD be overtired or coming down with something? I just ask this as she has gone off the potty a bit today and was also playing you up more than usual tonight as well regarding the bath etc. I bet she will be back on track soon enough.

There must be something in the air these days because as well as yourself I am tired, DS has gone off potty again today and was pretty naughty this afternoon.

We went into town (which I never normally do with the 2 lo's as its so much hassle)and he was great. Met DH and DH took him off to the toilet etc. Then went to a pals this afternoon for coffee/playdate. DS was a nightmare. Kept saying all the toys were his, kept jumping on top of DS2 and pals lo, wouldn't do anything he was asked to do etc etc. He had napped for about 45 mins as well so it wasn't like he was tired.

Anyway, wore him out once home again and went down really well at 8pm No bedtime shenanigans for us but theres always tomorrow and the next night and the next.....

I have many nights when DS won't get washed/bath/do his teeth etc. I am ignoring all of this bad behaviour now. It seems to work best as he then realises mummy won't play games.

Hope your day is better tomorrow FOM.

glad to see this thread is still going. its ds' birthday tomorow, so am up frantically wrapping, and cant wait as he has been so good the last few days, althought they both have come down with colds today, so well see what tonight brings.
its his party on saturday, with his friends - any suggestions to keep a group of 2/3 years olds occupied? i figured i cant really get them to sit for organised games, so might just let them run riot.

although im sorry to hear it, im also glad to hear that other todlers still wake in the night.
ours isnt all the time, but we did get woken up at 1 last night , which then in turn wakes up dd, (who usually sleeps through), and then thats any chance of some sleep gone.
any way im rambling.

Happy Birthday to Goodwills lo. Good luck with the party on Sat. Definately let them run riot and maybe put on some childrens party songs. They are too young for any party games.

DS2 woke at 2.30 am but went straight back to sleep once he was tucked in again. I'm still tired though.

DS2 slept all the way through and woke at 7.20am. He is not in great form though and he ios battling with me oveer the tv. He is soooo demanding. After his breakfast he asks for TV but then says 'don't like fifi, don't like wiggly worms' etc. It drives me barmy. I ignored it this morning and told him if he wants tv thats whats on. I have DS2's and my breakfast to finish and I am normally jumping up and down like a yo yo catering to DS1's demands. Anyay DS1 accepted it eventually and went back and turned on tv himself.

Hoping the potty end of business goes well for us today and for everyone else to. Must go get that pull-up off!

Wel done FOM for dressing DD before Breakfast. I am a little reluctant to do that right now as wee accidents would only add more choas to the breakfast scene. Also DS2 is always starving for his bottle 1st thing.

As regards the potty, DS was doing well again yesterday but then just before bedtime he kept clutching and I knew he needed to go. I asked him if he needed the potty and he kept saying NO. Then of course he wee'd all over the floor in front of DH,DS2 and I and said 'I've done a wee wee' . He definately uses this to anger us.

Gosh my posts are long. Sorry for babbling.

Hey FOM. My last post of the evening. I need to get some sleep.

DS has been great today. Been weeing in potty when I have insisted and he told me a wee wee was coming at tea time and off he went and did it. I was so happy!

DS has also started to get into his car seat on 1.2.3 or cross mummy will come! He just about leaps in! Must realise I mean business

Stayed in cot tonight. Thats 2 nights in a row. Wondering whether to remove 1 side of his cotbed soon enough or leaving it until after our hols. We are going away end of Sept. What do you think? If we move him to bed will we then be opening a can of worms for our hols with him not feeling comfortable to sleep in a strange big single bed or going back to a travel cot? Maybe we could take his bed rail with us?

Yes I think we will see how it goes.
If he is happy to stay in cot then we will wait for him to let us know when he is ready for the bed.
We are hiring travel cots for our holiday and they are quite high so he may find it more difficult to climb out.(have been there before).

Both Ds's slept realy well last night. DS1 did wake crying in his cot but I think it was a nightmare. He has a thing about 'tigers are coming' at the moment. Didn't wake unitl 8.15am now I am on catch up for breakfast, washing and dressing but I still feel wrecked.

Gee God DS is a demon this morning and thats with extra sleep!!!!
Has tried the old cereal swapping thing again but I was having none of it so then proceeded to hit me. Took him to his room. he came down straight away. Seeing it as a game again. Hit me again. Told him if he continues there will be no park today. He stopped the hitting but the wingeing continues. He keeps saying he is tired??? Maybe he feels a bit under the weather but I'm not accepting his bad behaviour.

I have put him in front of the tv with his toast for a breather. He has calmed down thank god.

Now its DS2 throwing his breakfast all over the kitchen and wingeing

Oh my god its never ending.............

Sorry but anyone that says fgs just get on with it have no sympathy or understanding of other parents and their current situations going through the tantrums and struggles of toddlerhood. I am sure there are many many more experienced mothers than me out there but you need to have a rant, be able to look for advice and have your own time and space to think through how YOU wish to raise YOUR children. it may not be the easiest way but isn't that how we all learn?!

Ok thats that rant over.....

Sorry, I have had an awful day today. Feeling really low all day. DS1 was bad from the moment he got out of his cot to pretty much the moment he went to bed tonight. I was losing it with him during the day which was really stupid of me but I just was having a bad day and now I am dealing with the guilt of it all.

DS has this new horrible habit of smashing a plastic sand pit spade repeatedly on DS2's head. It breaks my heart. tbh DS1 is bullying DS2 all day long and that it was my biggest problem is. You are supposed to try and ignore bad behaviour but in this situation you can't. No bold corner, naughty step, room for 2 minutes etc works. waste of time. I just have to tell him off, let him have his tantrum, protect DS2 and wait for things to cool down.

I soooo hope tomorrow is a better day as today was one of the worst in a long time

Having a nice glass of vino now and looking forward to Big Brothers 2nd eviction