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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to say my daughter can't shave her legs?

311 replies

Iwillpopthekettleon · 29/09/2009 20:30

My DD1 is fed up with her "hairy legs" to be honest I don't think they are that bad, but then what do I know?! She is 12 and certainly things are happening and her body is changing, but doesn't 12 seem awfully young to be starting down that road?

I know she could use that stinky cream stuff and she doesn't have to slice her legs to ribbons like I remember doing ( and always when I was just about to go out!) but she seems so young.

I am not ready for this yet!! Has anyone else had this come up ?!! Help!!

OP posts:
TheFallenMadonna · 29/09/2009 20:32

12? I would let her shave them.

Fayrazzled · 29/09/2009 20:32

What about an electric shaver- she wouldn't risk slicing herself then. I think I was about 12 when I wanted to depilate. (Can always remember the embarrassment when my mum announced to all the relatives at Christmas that FC had bought me a Ladyshave.)

colditz · 29/09/2009 20:33

YABVU

The other girls will take the piss out of her if she has hairy legs at 12. They did even 20 years ago, so they certainly will now. Let her shave her legs and show her how to do it properly, don't make her be a target

YouLukaAmazing · 29/09/2009 20:33

Message withdrawn

nymphadora · 29/09/2009 20:33

Waxing?

TAFKAtheUrbanDryad · 29/09/2009 20:33

YABU. My mum didn't let me shave my legs - I have very pale skin and extremely dark hair - and I was bullied horrendously for it, although I was a wee bit older than 12. It was Year 9 and 10 IIRC, so i would have been 13-14.

If you get her a Venus or one of those Wilkinson Sword ones (Quattro?) then they come with extra moisturising strips on them, and you can also get proper ladies' shaving cream that moisturises the legs - or use conditioner, that leaves a nice finish on the skin too!

Is there a reason why your dd has started asking about this all of a sudden? Do all her friends do it? Is she being bullied for it?

brimfull · 29/09/2009 20:34

yabu

please let her shave her legs

HarlotOTara · 29/09/2009 20:34

Let her - she is probably hating her hairy legs and these things matter at her age. YABU

onepieceoflollipop · 29/09/2009 20:34

I honestly think that 12 isn't too young. I guess she is at secondary school (unless home educated?) so if she has started to think about it , she won't want to be "behind" the other girls.

I would say get her a decent brand of razor and some gel, if she is amenable then show her how to do it without cutting. imo the cream is worse; all those chemicals.

cocolepew · 29/09/2009 20:34

My DD is 8 and very hairy if she asks next summer I'm going to remove her hair for her. I was doing my legs at 11.

thisisyesterday · 29/09/2009 20:35

i think that if she is self-conscious about them it would be unkind not to let her do them.

is 12 too young to wax? maybe you could take her somewhere nice to get them done?

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 29/09/2009 20:35

DD1 (12) hasn't started to shave her legs yet, but has been shaving her underarms for about a year. She hasn't cut herself yet.
I would let her if she wants to, but make sure you get her a decent razor and that she knows to change the blade regularly. Or an electric razor as Fayrazzled says - but maybe not for Christmas .

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 29/09/2009 20:35

DD1 (12) hasn't started to shave her legs yet, but has been shaving her underarms for about a year. She hasn't cut herself yet.
I would let her if she wants to, but make sure you get her a decent razor and that she knows to change the blade regularly. Or an electric razor as Fayrazzled says - but maybe not for Christmas .

grumpypants · 29/09/2009 20:35

My dd is 10 and uses Veet. I think you have to help them to 'fit in' if it's not that important. IE aged 5 she had hers ears pierced because she was getting teased for not having them done and i didn't care that much. However tv in the bedroom is a nono because I DO care. So if she is getting embarrassed(PE etc) how much of an issue is it for you?

InMyLittleHead · 29/09/2009 20:35

I second the electric shaver one. It will be impossible to hurt herself, but she will hopefully be happier with her appearance. I think she is old enough to decide whether she is happy/unhappy with her looks.

castille · 29/09/2009 20:36

Why would you want to stop her?

If her legs are making her self-conscious, let her do it. If you don't, you risk her resenting you and maybe buying herself a nasty cheap bic which really will slice her skin to pieces. Whereas if you buy her a decent razor she'll be happy and grateful to you for understanding. She might even do it twice and find she can't be bothered for the rest of the winter

TrinityRhino · 29/09/2009 20:37

YABVU

why should you stop her
would you not shave your legs if you wanted to ?

so just cause she is 12 then she shouldn't even though she could be bullied, feel very self concious etc

beaniesinthebucketagain · 29/09/2009 20:38

yabu

i know its hard to see a 12 year old heading into women hood, but take time to teach her properly, or, the veet in shower creams good, wash on to legs shower and wash off with special sponge, and hairs go with it.

famishedass · 29/09/2009 20:38

YABU - let her shave her legs if she wants.

ABetaDad · 29/09/2009 20:39

I have heard that girls at DSs school get get bullied by the girls and mocked by the boys if they do not shave their legs. I would let her do it. Her life will be hell otherwise.

PandaEis · 29/09/2009 20:40

TBH i started shaving my legs when i was 11/12 even though my mum told me i couldnt i think that if she is developing and has noticeable hair on her legs then maybe its time for her to start to shave them it is all a matter of opinion though and try not to worry about the cutting of the legs thing as there are razors you can buy nowadays that dont cut your legs to ribbons (venus etc) it is good that you have a good relationship with your DD and you can talk about tis with her i didnt tell my mum as she kicked off when i asked if i was allowed to shave
xx ei xx

francagoestohollywood · 29/09/2009 20:40

Please, let her get rid of her hair. I recommend waxing over shaving, unless not that many hair.

4SucksFake · 29/09/2009 20:41

YABU. Let her shave her legs. Please.

LaDiDaDi · 29/09/2009 20:41

YABU not to let her do this if she wants to, if it's using a razor that you feel unhappy with then offer Veet or waxing as alternatives.

LynetteScavo · 29/09/2009 20:41

YABU.

She will shave them anyway.

I have only ever shaved my legs, starting when I was 12. I hope to find something better for my DD.

Any sugestions welcome!