to say my daughter can't shave her legs?

[Iwillpopthekettleon]

My DD1 is fed up with her "hairy legs" to be honest I don't think they are that bad, but then what do I know?! She is 12 and certainly things are happening and her body is changing, but doesn't 12 seem awfully young to be starting down that road?

I know she could use that stinky cream stuff and she doesn't have to slice her legs to ribbons like I remember doing ( and always when I was just about to go out!) but she seems so young.

I am not ready for this yet!! Has anyone else had this come up ?!! Help!!

Blimey Dominique07, I missed your stroking legs comment

You are coming across as a hairy-handed trucker...you might need them knuckles waxing...

I would definitely let her remove the hair, as I was that 12-year old who relly needed to shave her legs or Immac or something but my mum wouldn't let me . It did not help my confidence one bit. Also, I got comments from both girls and boys at school, i.e. "Hello lovely legs!(smirk)". She finally let me bleach them on holiday, but was never very keen on me shaving them. I ended up using an old blunt razor and (having no clue) shaving them dry. Which didn't cause too many cuts, but left my legs very sore and feeling 'burnt' for a couple of days .

So yes I'd let her.

really not 'relly' .

Actually I think it's a shame. Not that she wants to look nice, but why does that mean having to have smooth legs and spending a fortune on toiletries. It's all a slippery slope isn't it. Next they'll be pouring over vogue and wondering why they don't look like the models. I always thought because I didnt look like anyone in mags that I couldn't possibly be beautiful. That it I am going to send my dd to a nunnery!
I would let my DD if she wanted, but I would also try to throw a few feminist books her way

I would look nice as a Diamond. Stomach-stapling aside.

shiney - I can see your point, actually. If your dd is just wanting to shave because she sees her older siblings doing it then that's different to there being a genuine need IYSWIM.

So, in your dd's case I'd say there was no need to start shaving just yet.

YABU. She will have the piss taken out of her if she has hairy legs, the same thing happened to me . I was allowed to shave them from about 12 but the damage had already been done. I started getting them waxed at 15.

God, I find this thread depressing... especially the view that all female bodily hair is 'unhygienic' and disgusting.

DD at 4 has incredibly hairy legs, but her hairs are blonde (although visible now she has a tan). I hate to think of her being sniggered at and teased for something natural and I dread having this convo with her in the future.

However, I do recall how important it is to fit in with everyone else at the age of 12 or thereabouts and so I would agree that if she wants to rid herself of hair (I wouldn't shave, would epilate or wax) then let her, but it makes me a little that at this young age the 'ew, hair' thing is raising its ugly head...

Let her. She's got a lifetime of causing herself physical discomfort just to please boys ahead of her...she might as well start now.

grrrrrr.

tbh tho I was that twelve year old girl. My mum told me on no ACCOUNT Precious will you shave your legs. So I went upstairs and did it anyway without telling her gouged a ribbon of flesh out of my leg and then spent whole of the evening trying to hide gobs of blood with toilet paper and trying not to faint [pale dizzy emoticon]

YANBU

When I was 12 I was wearing a 34C bra, had hairy armpits and had pubes that didn't know they weren't supposed to keep going down my inner thighs.

I didn't even ask my Mum about whether I could shave my legs or armpits. I just did it. No problem - apart from my Dad not being impressed that I made his razor blunt!

Jeez, it's not like they're asking for a tattoo It's about not being the hairy monster, as they perceive it and probably completely out of proportion, next to girls who aren't. Fitting in and not standing out is so important at that age. Have all you 'too young' supporters forgotten what it was like to be that age?

I started with Nair at nine- mainly because it was lying around the bathroom and I was curious. Of course then you feel ridiculously hairy once it grows back. And so the treadmill begins...

If it's not a big issue to her really, try and fob her off a bit longer, but it depends how much it's bothering her. And definitely don't go the shaving route.

There is never a genuine "need" to shave your legs.

Just a socially constructed want.

I'll be explaining that to my DD when she demands to wax/ shave. I won't stop her doing it, (I'll help her if she wants me to) but I want her to be aware that it's because of a social need, not an inherent one.

Dominique=creepy

YABU. It's up to her if she wants to shave her legs.

I started off in my teens faffing around with Nair or Veet or whatever. As soon as I discovered razors, I wondered what all that was about.

Get her a Venus one. They're very difficult to cut yourself with, even if you're a bit cackhanded, and they have nice moisturising strips which work pretty well.

Oh I manage it frequently, Carmen

Yanbu to be reluctant to start a kid on this road -

but otoh 12 is a difficult time (the difficult time that lasts up to about 21) and its best to be sympathetic....
don't like the creams because some have nasty reactions. though that woul dbe quickly apparent.

i think i started shaving at the point when my tights no longer hid the hair....even light coloured hair can be v.visible (and therefore painfully visibie to the mind of the self-conscious teen.)

Shaving is a really bad idea, because of stubble...cream/waxing better or, if you can afford it, send her to a beauty parlour (is that the right term? ) & get it done properly with advice on how to go on in future.

I meant YABU! D'oh - red wine...

I'm sure you would Shiney. Don't doubt it for a moment and perhaps my personal example is a little extreme although true.

It does scare me how fast little girls want to be grown up these days and peer pressure, and bitchiness, can be horrific. I can understand the reluctance to give in to it but for every one of you 'too young, beautiful as you are' supporters there are two or three 'of course dear and why don't you put some fake tan on as well and pluck your eyebrows' supporters that undermines it all and can leave other girls feeling inadequate and 'un-groomed' no matter how much positive re-enforcement they get at home.

I don't know what the answer is but I can only say that if my DD (if I had one) desperately wanted to shave her legs at 12 I would let her (or help her wax them) just based on my own experiences.

I would let her-my mother said the same, but I didn't listen and did it anyway-I expect your DD will do the same.

Thank you everyone - wow what a lot of responses

It does scare me how fast they grow up. For her it isn't about trying to look gorgeous for boys ( fortunately ) because while her body maybe on the turn, she is not into boys yet, although it probably won't be too long, and that will be my next headache It is more about being the same. I expect she will try it once and get all in a pickle and then not bother for a while.