The Plus One is coming on her own.

[BeleagueredBride]

We had a disaster at the beginning of the year as my partner became ill. We had to cancel our wedding. Thankfully we were insured and more importantly he is fine.

All set to go again although six people who said yes iat Easter cannot make the new date.

My partner originally wanted to invite a guy, a more recent friend, he was becoming close to but we had no room but now we can accommodate him Partner has met his partner in passing and I have met the guy in passing but never met his partner.

We invited him and as a matter of courtesy his partner as his plus one.

Reply came back he is staying at home to look after kids but she is coming! WTF?

I want to reply explaining that she was essentially his plus one . Why would you go alone to a virtual stranger’s wedding? She possibly knows two other couples but really?

My partner says we have to suck it up.

What would you do?

Yes, agree 100%

Also agree with that quoted post by @5128gap ^

No but it’s a social norm. A bit like you give the bride and groom a card. No one tells you to. There are loads of social norms in life that are not explicitly spelt out 🙄

It’s also kind of a giveaway when you’re invited to the wedding of people you barely know, but your husband/wife/partner is the one who knows the person getting married, why would you be invited otherwise?

It is possible neither of them have any social awareness at all, and if that’s the case, they would hugely benefit from having someone one point it out to them. Ideally in a way that gives them an opportunity to save face, laugh it off, or the like.

It seems odd! But you'll be so busy enjoying your wedding you'll probably not really notice (if you're like any bride I've met), so just let it go. Don't feel compelled to babysit or entertain them-this is not your problem.

No, if they know her name then it would be weird to write “Michael plus one” rather than Michael and Laura”.

It’s still the social norm that if Michael is the friend of the groom but they barely know Laura, then Laura is only invited as the partner of Michael and not as a guest in her own right.

She really isn’t. Look at the vote not the bunch of self-flagellation pushers who post on AIBU. And plenty of the YABU votes will be from posters who still think it’s a faux pas on the guests’ part but don’t think OP should do anything about it.

Nope!

The poll is currently 77% that op is not unreasonable. Loads of people are saying it’s weird, suggest you read the threads again.

This

As has been stated, named or not, if you barely know the bride and groom but your partner knows them, it’s abundantly clear from logic alone that you’re only invited as the guest of your partner.

Also it’s not just the poll that backs this up, plenty of posters saying it’s odd.

Suck it up

Oh My God.

That is the bitchiest post on this entire thread.

It was the phrasing of 'why is he sending her?' that I found especially objectionable, in spite of all the rest - it was very infantilising of a grown woman.

I don’t get the comments that because she was named she can come without the partner. When my then-boyfriend and I were invited to my friend’s wedding, both by name, and we subsequently broke up, he didn’t insist on turning up to the wedding anyway!

LOL, this is deeply weird behaviour! YANBU, OP. Of course in situations like this, if one of you has to stay home and mind the kids, you send the half of the couple who has the actual connection to the Bride and Groom!

I'd love to know what the actual heck this couple were thinking. Is the husband shy and introverted, while the wife is extroverted and loves to meet new people? Do they rigidly take it in turns to "represent the family" at weddings, regardless of who has the actual connection to the happy couple? Did the husband once cheat on the wife while attending a wedding solo, and she's stipulated that he's never to attend weddings solo again? Does the wife actually fancy the OP's fiance, and wants to object at the wedding?!

I'm really not sure what the etiquette in this situation is. OP, could your fiance contact the husband, and ask if there's a particular reason why they chose for the wife to attend, instead of him. I think it would be reasonable of your fiance to point out that while his wife seems lovely etc etc, you barely know her!

Ultimately however, I don't think there's a polite way of uninviting her. But I'm really curious to know what happens next and what she's like at the wedding!

I imagine her as being a sort of Amy Farrah Fowler type.

But you literally invited her…her name was on the invitation. It would be incredibly mean spirited of you to uninvite her now (and that’s what you’d be doing by ‘ringing the bloke and having a chat’). Doesn’t really matter the situation about ‘plus one’…she was named as an invited guest, not a random plus one.

lol