Do not enter-you are a s**t mum

[Getthosesquishiesoutofthehouse]

This is what my 8 year old wrote on her door handle thing, that you can hang over your door.
Following another argument about not being allowed on YouTube, she stormed upstairs, shut the door and put this sign on the handle, she then fell asleep.
We were travelling lots at the weekend and are all lacking sleep. Dh says to just leave it, but I find it upsetting and was shocked she'd written it.
None of us have mentioned it yet.

What would you do?

That's what comes from letting an 8 year old watch YouTube!

And don't get involved in the youtube argument. You've said no and there's nothing else to say

Don't take it personally.

I'd be tempted to ignore it as she's probably after a reaction.

If she does it again, address the bad language.

Yes, you are right there, the language isn't acceptable. I was concentrating more on the fact that she was having a hissy fit because she didn't like the rules her Mum set for her, but yes, she should pull her on the language.

In my upbringing and my marriage, the child's father would have dealt with that very firmly. The fact that he wants to treat it as nothing perhaps explains why it happened.

'don't mention it'
'just ignore it'
'have a good chuckle'

WTF.

Yep, too many kids raised by YouTube and TikTok these days

Home educated your kids by any chance @Screamingabdabz

I agree she is looking for a reaction and pushing the boundary. Just remove the sign and hold firm on the boundary. If she said that to my face I'd probably say something along the lines of 'hey, that's not nice'.

I would add an addendum to her note. Give the context behind her outburst and end the note with the language used in her not will be discussed but not tolerated.

What an unpleasant and unnecessary comment!

I know. These answers are unhinged! How the hell are they supposed to learn respect if they’re not even taught to respect their parents?

Not acceptable at all.

Overtired tantrum, normal.

Swearing at you? Absolutely not. Your job is to teach her manners and respect, so she needs a stern talking to and consequence. Else she’ll continue.

My 8 year old tries it on sometimes, gets cross and shouts etc. But he’d know he’d be in deep trouble for swearing at me. Neither me or dad would allow him to talk to either of us like that.

If your 8 year old told you you were a shit mum, your response would be hey, that's not nice?

Yup! If child is having these reactions for not having YouTube, they are not mature enough to have it.

Hope you’re okay though, OP, I definitely would have the conversation with her. But honestly, if you bring back in YouTube, you will keep finding yourself in this position. Just take it away for the foreseeable.

I remember leaving angry notes at that age (for my parents and brother) when I felt I had been wronged, perhaps saying things like “my parents are horrible”; I suppose I wanted a reaction. I drafted much worse ones, but couldn’t bring myself to put them out.

Not a comment

a question

I sometimes think 'old school' parenting could do with a comeback 😀. I can imagine my own mum's "just who do you think you're speaking to? How dare you!..." was enough for me to never do whatever it was again. I don't even remember pumishments, just her words.

Do 'calm chats' and brushing things off as 'pushing bounderies' actually teach kids how to behave?

(Goes without saying (I expect) I'm not a parent, which is probably for the best 🤭).

She’s watching too much junk. No more YouTube.

If your 8 year old swore at you, you’d say “that’s not nice”? No wonder the schools are struggling with behaviour if that’s considered an appropriate parental response!

Yes and they always apologise and explain they didn't mean it once they calm down. And they do not say things like that now, they are kind, well mannered children. I don't need to have a throw a tantrum every time they struggle to prove them right.

I am genuinely extremely taken aback by the amount of doormats who would do nothing.

What other bad behaviour is allowed to go unpunished in these homes??

I’d cross out mum and write “kid” then put it on my bedroom door handle.

Remove you tube. Limit or remove screen time completely. I don’t think I’d acknowledge the note on the door past that - I’d probably pretend I hadn’t seen it.

Sounds just like my daughter at aged 8. If it’s any consolation she’s now 14 and is delightful, well behaved, funny and so loving. She was just a handful at that age lol 😂