DH away and not answering phone

[Wanttohelpbuthow]

DH has been away for work on and off for the last few weeks, really long hours + jet lag.

He came home for one night on Tuesday night (we live near a major airport) which was essentially a layover almost at our house before driving the next morning 5 hours, again for work where he is the for the next 10 days.

He was obviously incredibly tired and was being unreasonable and out of character yesterday morning before he left which resulted in an argument. He then left without saying goodbye and I haven’t heard from him since, he’s never ignored me before but he went the entire day ignoring any calls or messages. I left it from mid afternoon but now still haven’t heard from him, the only reason I know he’s got there safely is because I have him on find friends.

I can also see he is still at the hotel … it’s 1pm and he should be working today as far as I know. I’m now getting really worried. Is there anything I can do apart from wait? Am I being overly anxious?

Any news yet OP?

Curious, what line of work does he do to travel so much?

If he has both work and personal phones i’m inclined to think he’s in a sulk and has left his personal phone in the hotel room.

Presume all ok @Wanttohelpbuthow ?

Hi OP. You must be very worried and I sympathise. My OH “disappeared” on a trip to Athens last month - we had an argument about something and he was flying that evening. He didn’t contact me for 3 days, despite me sending messages to him and the people he’d flown with. Eventually my son told me he’d called him and told him he was fine. He had deliberately not contacted me to punish me. Aside from this position, even if he isn’t angry (only you know your own relationship and past with his behaviour) and this is out of character, then there’s still no excuse for him not being in touch with you. Unless something has happened (I really hope not) then when he arrives home, I’d be having a conversation about it and making it clear that to avoid future concern and wasting your time he needs to contact you to let you know he’s ok. Hoping you’ll update us.

Are you sure he’s not having an affair?

I think the hotel won't confirm if he is there or not but they can take your details and pass a message on. As far as I know

This was all 2 days ago
so no point speculating
@Wanttohelpbuthow is either going to bother to update or not
I’d guess “or not”

Competent adults can be taken seriously ill, especially when mega stressed and exhausted.

I'm going to hope he us fine and left his phone. He has been gone a day now and arrived at the hotel.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with them doing a welfare check. If they wake him up then good. To leave you worrying like this is cruel.
Once he does call. And he will. Tear him a new one and tell him he does this again he will be microchipped in his sleep.
How really awful for you.

@Wanttohelpbuthow any update??

I have find my friends turned on for my husband. It's nothing nefarious. It was originally to help if he ever lost his phone.

I check it occasionally when he is making long drives before I send him a text, because I like to wait until he is already at his destination or he is stopped at a services. He was (we think) briefly distracted by a text notification years ago at a traffic light when he went into the back of the car in front (the only accident he's had in twenty plus years of driving) and it has made me wary of sending him texts while he is driving since.

I don't use it to check he's at the pub he said he was going to or anything crazy like that.

I hope so but so annoying when you become invested and hoping for the best. Fingers crossed!!

Hope everything’s okay

Everything will be fine I reckon
@Wanttohelpbuthow just hasn’t been arsed to update
shame really seeing as she got support from posters

I hope it turns out she just couldn’t be arsed to update- the alternative is that something did turn out to be wrong and she’s currently dealing with a crisis of some sort.

Doubt it highly

Isn't there some sort of confidentiality that the hotel can't pass on certain information, wife or not? Unfortunately I'm sure lots of people would abuse this tracking their partners and it not being a legitimate concern.

@Cherryicecreamx hence why people are suggesting the OP ask the hotel to check on him and ask him to call her - rather than asking for information.

This. I hope all is well OP

Isn't that confirming his stay, are they allowed to do that?

I think the OP is in the UK, theres no central register of phone numbers here, Google is the best way to find a phone number

@Wanttohelpbuthow I hope you have managed to reach him and things are feeling a bit better? Big Hugs.

Hoping for an update too OP. Hope everything is ok.

Hoping all is well op?