AIBU to be worried by outdated children’s books being read to our preschooler?

[Dirtymirrors]

Name changed for this. I'm feeling uncomfortable with things but am in a slightly sensitive situation and I don't want to make it harder than it needs to be.

My DH recently lost his mother and only lost his father a few years ago. He has brought a lot of books and other things from the family home to ours which he wants to keep. I am trying not to mind most of it. The problem is the children's books. Which he is now reading to our preschool child. They are very dated and the portrayal of other cultures is stereotypes and insensitive. This ranges from the mildly offensive such as Rupert to some really horrendous caricatures in books from the 50's.

Do I say anything? I want my DD to grow up with a good understanding of different cultures and norms not stereotypes and racism. I don't want to make anything harder on my DH though.

Just to be clear DH is not racist he just thinks that the atmosphere we create will have far more influence than the books. He also does discuss why certain themes and pictures are wrong with DD.

YABU = the books are harmless don't be so worried.

YANBU = I would not be comfortable with this either.

What's wrong with Rupert?

No, It Wasn’t “Politically Incorrect”, It Was Just Racist. Own it.

You don’t need to choose between old stuff and modern views. Actually I think it’s good to look at the past and acknowledge it.
If a film or book has outdated views I pause for a second and say that this is how some people felt in the past.Have a conversation about the issue if needed!
My kids now clock something’ of it’s time’ themselves and mention it/ laugh/ are sad appropriately. They can enjoy old books etc but recognise that current standards of language and behaviour are a recent progression that we should value.

I’m not offended by everything. I just don’t want casual sexism and racism in a cosy children’s story, it normalises it. I hope other decent people feel the same?

No need to ban anything, just call it out for what it is- prejudice and unkindness that has no place in a modern society.

I agree in many cases and have always intended to read Enid Blyton and the rest at an appropriate age. At 3 having books with such blatant racism, especially in the pictures too, gave me pause.

I hear you. Pictures are difficult, I have skipped/ changed words for a young child. But the pictures are a problem. Maybe put them away until ‘she can appreciate them’ to placate DH. Then get them out when she’s old enough to chat about the problems?

Oh my god when I told my DH about "the five find outers" he was absolutely convinced I was either making it up or that my parents had actually been reading me some weird parody of the famous five 🤣

I think you must have a quite amazing life if this is your only worry?
You don't have to read the books that you don't like the look of and you,can explain to your children if you don't like the way they are written about the past and how things were thought of differently then.
You can explain how some people women, were disadvantaged then.( Still are.)
I was recently looking at a modern book about aliens that was aimed at 4 to 5 year olds.The book was definitely about how people should get on and love one another, two groups of aliens coming together.
What I didn't like was the two young aliens stole a space ship to get together,and had a baby on the run.
So some of the modern books aimed at kids are also quite strange to my mind.Actually loads of them are odd as well.

It depends on the books.
I think some are timeless Eg I still love Shirley Hughes especially her illustrations, Judith Kerr (the tiger who came to tea is one of my all time favourites, Babar and Mrs Pepperpot stories. Which i remember from my own childhood, But I wouldn't be happy about some of the Enid Button stories I don't actually like Enid Blyton at all because I don't think she is a good writer and I never bought them for my children but I think some are passable but not the obviously racist ones.
I think you have to decide based on what you think is acceptable. Some books may be ok if they are well written and if you talk to your child while reading them and also have books in the house that are more culturally diverse and non stereotypical

'The Five Find-Outers' (or, to use their full name, 'The Five Find-Outers and Dog') does indeed sound like a very unimaginative or parody name.

If I recall correctly, the name was thought up by the children themselves on the spot in the first book, so they probably would go for a more Ronseal name than conjure up anything sophisticated.

It has been pointed out frequently, that when it comes to The Famous Five and The Secret Seven at least, Enid Blyton gave them very generic titles that, in most cases, could have applied to pretty much any title in the series - e.g. Go Ahead, Secret Seven; Five Have a Wonderful Time.

This is mostly where I have ended up. A lot of them are o.k. with a touch of adaptation but a few have been put aside until later.

Tbf the Water Babies was written as a critique of child chimney sweeps and their high mortality rate plus pollution. I’m not entirely sure they considered it a children’s tale even when published (despite being aimed at Land Babies by the author).