To be suprised schools still do French exchanges ?what with the safeguard risks

[WhatTheCatHeard]

So my child is disappointed
that we don’t want them to go int he French exchange, which woudl
be basically our child living with another random family for a week…
then returning the favour

seems a bit too much of a risk for me
but im
suprised it’s even really allowed these days

I'd be more worried about Austria

Why? What in particular? Some German exchanges are in Austria.

Why?

What makes Austrians more dangerous than French, Spanish or UK people?

I think the Pelicot case, and more stories of men drugging women and children has moved the dial.

I think that the school kind of vet the parents and expect the exchange school to do the same. I know of a friend of mine was asked to host two students instead of the one her child did the exchange with as the school were not happy with the circumstances of the house the other student was meant to go to.

They might vet to an extent, overcrowed, dirty, mid divorce or whatever.
Very difficult to vet against sex predators if they haven't been convicted.

As I say, few would have objected to an exchange with Bea but would your really want your kid around AMW?

Ok but in general British children are growing up with less freedom than children in many other countries. This may come with some advantages in terms of protecting them but there are also disadvantages such as making them less prepared for life as an adult/ work etc. In today’s world these children in other countries are their future job competion. Aside from that from a fulfillment perspective if you shy away from experiences you miss out on having fun and enriching experiences.

yes obviously we don’t just do anything and have to weight up the risks etc and make certain choices - we shouldn’t just do whatever we want. But the school has deemed this to be ok, millions of children around the world will be doing similar things.

Giving more freedom means kids walking home alone, less nanny state.

It doesn't mean putting them in strangers houses.
Think about it we spend years telling kids,don't go with strangers, don't get in a strange car....

Then at 14 off you go to a strangers house

Yet only 4 years later we send them off back packing around the world or to live with a bunch of strangers at university. Children need to be pushed outside of their comfort zone to learn resilience, problem solving, build confidence and much more

I wouldn't let my child go... I remember some of the kids that went in my school had horrible times! For all those saying that they will miss out, what's wrong with travelling with your child yourself?

I mean, that is awful and it is inexcusable and traumatising. However, I don’t think it’s the norm by any means. And maybe you wouldn’t have contacted anybody. People know their own children best. Mine would be calling and texting me ASAP, and would prob tell their friends and go en masse to the teacher. It’s still not a big enough risk to ban all exchanges, in my view.

There's a big difference between living in halls at 18 to staying in an unknown family's home at 14!

God, that was so normal when I was young. I was sent to a random US family for a month, I don’t think my parents knew anything other than their name and address. I didn’t have a phone on me either.

It takes a moment to take their innocence, what is a call or a text afterwards going to do? The damage is done and the child has to live with that.

The risks are still not high enough to ban these events for all. Many of us and our kids have had positive and educational experiences and have no regrets. I accept many now may disagree, as parental anxiety increases exponentially.

Um, last exchange our kid went on the teachers specifically did have spare accommodation in case of any problem.

No magic involved. Just responsible planning, risk assessment, sensible balance.

ds did an exchange when he was 16. we all had to get a dbs check and the host families were similarly checked.

it's the only overseas trip that's worth the ££ if your goal is language acquisition - don't learn anything by going to France with all your UK classmates.....

It's not the norm of course. If it were, I am sure the whole idea of exchanges would have been scrapped a long time ago. But I have met many people over the years who had bad experiences like me.

We know that far from all people subjected to any kind of sexual abuse or behaviour actually tell anyone at the time. Perhaps your child would. I would like to think mine would too. But we never quite know, and many children wouldn't tell an adult.

It's just not worth the risk when there are other ways of making language learning happen.

It’s not just language learning though it is experiencing another culture in a way just visiting a country doesn’t, it’s learning about people from a different culture/background to us and how to communicate/ be around them, it’s learning how to be away from home and in a different environment.

Plenty of kids did it years ago, and suffered no harm. I feel sorry for children nowadays - not everything outside is a risk.

They are more at risk sitting at home on social media, than this. 🙄

I was always disappointed that I never got the opportunity to go on an exchange trip but we did have exchange students stay with us, usually teenage French students staying for two weeks in the summer but once we had a Spanish boy, must have been about 12 years old, who stayed with us for an entire year, which is absolutely wild when I think about it now. I adored him though, I was about 5 and he played football and chess with me which my older brothers didn't do so much.

DD's class were supposed to do a German exchange but her school didn't get the necessary funding from Erasmus. They wouldn't have been staying in houses though, they would have stayed in a hostel or something. But the Germans have been to visit here, staying in a hostel or hotel, and went to school with DD's class and it was a great experience for them all, they'll be coming again in the spring too. In this case the language experience is English (as its the second language for both the Germans and DD's class, but not for DD who is bilingual so she's not getting any language benefits from it but nevermind)

@Natsku that makes perfect sense to me staying in a hostel or similar. But doing things together during the day.

The risk of being in a strangers house is wild.
You wouldn't do it as an adult, why would you want your kids in that position.

People stay in stranger's houses all the time - it's how Airbnb started - connecting people with spare rooms or even couch spaces for short stays. Millions of people answer ads for house or flat shares all over the world. Student accommodation outside halls is frequently multiple strangers sharing a house together. It's not the rarity you think it is.

What do you think lodgers do?