Unnecessary comment about my outfit from male member of staff at the school - your thoughts?

[TwatAtSchool91]

I live a stones throw from a secondary school which I have to pass daily on our school run.

A male member of staff stands outside in the morning greeting the kids.

A few months ago he made a comment to me as I walked past him. It was a stupid remark, nothing vulgar or massively offensive, but it has bothered me to the extent I'm now self conscious about what I'm wearing whenever I have to go past him.

The comment he made was "morning Blade" in a mocking tone, both infront of the secondary school kids and my own.

(for reference I was wearing a belted leather trench coat and some black riding style boots)

It wasn't a friendly jibe, he was being a twat. I wouldn't give it much thought if he were a random in the street but he's stood there representing the school 😐

Would you have raised it with the school or not? Do you think it was inappropriate?

I agree it’s a bit inappropriate I don’t think a teacher should be setting this sort of example to kids because it is just rude to comment on someone’s outfit like that . Don’t think I’d bother reporting it personally but that’s just me

I don't think that was too bad - it wasn't a sexual remark or an insulting one - just a silly one. I'd let it go but if you're really bothered, say something to him.

I had a similar get-up (black belted trench and black boots) once and my teenage daughter told me I looked like the Gestapo.

It really spoiled my day and I never word that combo again!

I think the problem is that banter is subjective, and a lot of people don’t realise that someone needs to know you to understand your tone and whether you’re joking. I see far too many people, mainly men, trying to be funny with complete strangers without considering how it might come across. I’d probably let this one go over your head, but if he does it again, tell him directly to pack it in before making a complaint to the school. I do agree that it was very unprofessional when he was standing there representing them.

How was it mocking OP? It was simply saying she was wearing something which made her look like a film character. OP would simply look ridiculous if she entered a formal complaint.

I occasionally get called Dennis the Menace when wearing one of my favourite t-shirts. I really don't mind 🙂

It wasn't critiquing, though. It was simply commenting. Many might take it as a compliment.

Men fairly regularly take the piss out of each other for what they're wearing.

Don’t move to Ireland, you wouldn’t last five minutes.

It's got nothing to do with being a wowan. People being hysterical and making everything about sex and gender are doing us no favours.

I actually think you're being more insulting to him by referring to him as a twat, and assigning your username to reflect that.

Yup. The first time I had cause to wear my brand new and pristine high-vis jacket and hard hat near a construction site I heard a shout of "It's alright lads, Bob the Builder's here".

That's why we won't move on. Some want progression at a disproportionate rate.

I wear a very similar get up in the winter and am fully aware I look like a matrix/Allo allo reject and embrace it 😂 I’d have had a banter with him personally. Even if it was a ‘power play’, owning your sense of style shows people they can’t get a rise. No one who actually feels confident in how they look would be stewing on this months later.

He should not have mocked a fellow teacher in front of pupils but definitely do not raise this with anyone - you'll come off as being over sensitive and lacking in humour. Just have a couple of one liners ready to go should he repeat the comment when you next wear the outfit.

blade
neo
herr flick

Think you did OK, if a comparison is being made.

It would annoy me too, it is funny but it's not fair to make someone feel self conscious. I had a pink leather jacket once and a few people made comments about Grease or Pink Ladies. I didn't like it and stopped wearing it.

Yeah I would agree with this. 'I can't wear that, the lads will rip the piss all night' is a legitimate reason for a man to make a fashion choice. 'I can't wear that, women will silently judge me' is more likely the female equivalent.

Well this is all about perception isn't it I would have found that funny quick and acknowledging a shared love of something.

Again all about you and the way you've taken it if I had to think that the jacket I would a expect people to reference Grease and b be really pleased because it would be echoing and nostalgic of something that I love.

It’s a bit late now and honestly the school won’t do anything with it other than probably have a mild conversation with the staff member.

The banter is completely different in Ireland though

@Sereine it was critiquing though, a critique doesn’t have to be negative does it? And again it’s still not normal to critique strangers outfits as they walk past you.

His comment has a "negging" tang to it. Make a note of it. If it happens again, raise it with the school.

"It wasn't a friendly jibe, he was being a twat." Trust your instinct.

Do you have something you want to say, or are you just playing with emojis?

Six boys were named Blade in 2011. Which gets them right to being a teenager entering their secondary school in 2026.