To ask ds to ask his gf to dress appropriately?

[Daisypod]

We are going to a national trust place soon and ds has asked if his relatively new gf can come. I’m fine with that but she does tend to wear very revealing clothing (skirts only covering half her bum!)
Would I be unreasonable to ask for her to dress a little more conservatively for the day? If so how would you say it?
I really try to not judge others clothing choices but honestly I think showing this much is a bit much for a family day out.

Seriously I see it everyday when I drive home from work, teenagers walking home from school in groups of say 3 or 4, every single one skirts shorter than a belt,and you can see all their knickers,some arnt particularly slim!!!

No i wouldn't.

But it's not OPs place to tell her (assuming this isn't a massive exaggeration).

'I never believe that women feel empowered to be half naked when out.'

• some women like dressing that way. It does seem odd, if you're in a relationship it's not like you're wearing the outfit on a night out to attract attention.

How about just giving her a chance and seeing what she does wear on a family day out to a NT property

She may surprise you

OP may not be judgy but it is serious. She may well have not thought through telling her DS to police his girlfriend’s outfits. It is a slippery slope. Anyone who has had a daughter unwilling to wear certain clothes because of their boyfriend attitude will be rightfully incensed.

I hate to break it to you, but clothing styles do not equal what personal values a person has.

I think I must live in an alternative reality because I don't see youngsters bums on constant display. But then again I don't tend to focus on women's bums! Maybe it's just me 😂

My 14yo wears short skirts sometimes but they are either the ones with shorts attached or she wears shorts under them. All her friends seem to do the same.

Shark jumped.

At age 80: "why won't my son talk to me? All I did was dictate what his girlfriend's could wear to preserve my self-image"

Fairly common in my area, I think it’s just the trend at the moment.

@Daisypod don’t say anything, YANBU but it’s not a battle worth fighting or straining a relationship with your DS for.

Because she might be kind, generous, caring, funny, have the same hobbies and interests as him?

I think we may have the same ex!

This is a great idea because what the world needs is more people policing what women wear.

Where did she wear this outfit? Was it to a pub/club/festival? Or was it to church or Sunday lunch with the grandparents?

Do you honestly think she would wear this to a family day out?

Discourag the idea of her coming, she doesn't sound like someone who would enjoy a day out at a NT place.

God alive, we're talking about weight now too.

I hate the way we have to pretend it’s ok for people to have bum cheeks on show in the supermarket? restaurant etc.

I would definitely get my son to say something, I would not want to be walking around with someone half dressed.

If she doesnt like it then she doesn't join you

Maybe she has never been told that there are different dress styles appropriate to different places

I don't get this going on about her outfit being her choice. Of course it is. That's obvious.
But your arse hanging our of a short skirt looks seriously shit and loads of people DO find it inappropriate. Regardless of what I think of it myself.
She's seemingly not aware of that and therefore it's informative to point it out to her.
It's not about control.
It's a statement of fact.

Sorry to break it to you but but it does. The way you dress can tell a lot about your values and what's important to you. You don't have to dress revealing your bum and all skimpily to be empowered, that's just rubbish.

It's common sense to be able to and at your dressing for the occasion but I guess if she's going to a corporate interview she will insist on showing half her bum because she is empowered??? Of course not she will adapt her dressing accordingly.

Why does she think people need to see her bum while she walks around? You can dress one way with your other young skimpy friends while respecting other people and adjusting in different settings, will she dress that way to a funeral in a church???

There's no dress code at NT properties!

Short, often ruffled skirts are in this summer, very short, often with built-in shorts, which are super-comfy.

Say nothing.

I wear mini skirts and dresses and I love nature, hiking, etc.

Believe it or not, women can wear revealing clothing AND have interests!! Who'd of thought!

Then the OP shouldn’t have said that the girlfriend can come along.

It's really not. I've seen womens wearing clothes like this to festivals and rock pubs/clubs for many years now.

Has she worn the outfit you describe everytime, though? I would imagine she has a variety of outfits?