to think the UK should have bidets

[LarkspurBlues]

Just that really. I far prefer the French habit of having a wash after having a no 2, much more civilised. The British way is actually unhygienic and gross.

We were recently on holiday in Spain and there was a bidet. With a bidet towel on the rail next to it.

bidet yes. Communal shit towel? No 😂

is it supposed to go in the bath for the maid as and when with the rest ?!

If I was going to go to the bother of getting my entire bottom/genital region wet, I'd just have a nice bath and do it properly! It's not that much more trouble, and much more pleasant!

And while I don't often have baths, yes, I always have a very quick rinse off in the shower (we currently have an over-bath shower) afterwards, for the same reason I rinse the dishes under hot water after I've washed them in the sink.

I think there are two main varieties.

One is a tap and you turn it on and fill the bowl so you can then splosh round and give your bottom a bath. This must involve having your hands in poo infested water - unless you kind of dip your bum in, like bread into a cheese fondue.

The other I think, yes, you back up to the jet and have a power wash. This must as you say, require adept manoeuvring so that you target the jet at the bullseye. Hopefully the pressure is, Goldilocks-style, just right, or the jet would ricochet poo everywhere. I would approach this type with caution, especially if you are not great at reversing a car.

I hate to think how the one for the girls works ... I guess it involves a lot of legs akimbo.

Agreed. I also shower off after a bath.

I actually just prefer a shower. Nothing like a full rainhead with decent water pressure for soothing away the cares of the day - and any residual fecal matter without having to get too involved in it all.

🤣

I think for people for whom washing is the norm, I can see how they might think not washing after a poo is gross. It’s what you are used to.

I’m English and live in the UK. We have had a bidet in each of the three houses we have lived in.

Omg you don’t all use the same flannel do you?
That sound grim!

Do you share the flannel?! 🤯

I'd quite like a bidet at home (useful for washing feet as well as bottoms!) but I'm not sure I'd share a public one!

99.9% of mine are “ghost poos” (never heard of the term, thanks to a pp!)

dp doesn’t, he uses a flannel or has a shower. I thought he was in the minority but clearly not… now I have the image of everyone walking around with shitty bums as the uk doesn’t have bidets..

DH loves a bidet. I think they are vile. As a compromise we installed a Japanese toilet in our bathroom. I don’t use the water spray but appreciate the heated seat.

I love my Toto washlet (Japanese electric bum washer). Nearly every home and business in Japan has one.

It must be possible to get them installed in the UK because the Japanese embassy on Picadilly has them, and IIRC one of the restaurants in the Shard does too, although when I went it wasn't working.

You do have to be careful though as they can splash bacteria around. They have a "lady bidet" function for washing the vulval area, and a lot of women avoid using it because of the risk of UTI.

This is really awful. It’s like it’s having the opposite impact people
think as in a public place you are splashing other peoples bacteria on your bits!

I think in a private home then fine. I am so regular I always go first thing in the morning then shower. it is annoying of if I can’t though.

If you want to wash your anus why not just put some diluted liquid soap onto loo roll to wipe?

The thing is that water alone doesn’t do a whole lot more than paper. To be clean you need to use a cleanser because poo has fat and proteins in it. If you want a clean bottom after a poo, have a shower.

If you wipe properly and use a damp soapy tissue, that is better than a bidet.
The French use very little soap, so please don’t put us in the same category.

I was going to say similar. Have many French friends in France and none of them have bidets.

I just read up and found that ghost poos are the sign of a healthy bowel.

Yup. All of mine are ‘ghost’. I’m surprised more people don’t know this.

The one thing I am never, ever going to do again after reading this thread is use a hotel flannel to wash my face.

I had no idea people used them for their bottom crack. Laundered or not, I just don't want it anywhere near my face.

What a waste of water!

So if you poo three times a day you’d have three baths? That’ll be a huge bill, plus a waste of time.

My bathroom is too small but yes, I'd love one.

Not at all. I don't usually have a bath at all, as I said. I prefer a shower. I'm simply saying that if one is going to the trouble of using a bidet to take a sitz bath, one might as well go whole hog, and just take a bath!

Gosh, pooing three times a day is rather a lot. I feel like most people just go once? Also, like some pp, I find that as I have a good diet, there's really no need to splash warm water over myself and potentially spread bacteria around while not killing any of them (as there's no soap). Toilet paper does the job perfectly well, along with a shower once or twice a day - and most of the time it aligns well so that I can take a shower immediately after.

As no one is touching or putting their face in my rear throughout the day, I don't think it needs to be soapy clean at every possible second.

I bet most poo more than once a day!