to think the UK should have bidets

[LarkspurBlues]

Just that really. I far prefer the French habit of having a wash after having a no 2, much more civilised. The British way is actually unhygienic and gross.

Poo shouldn’t be messy, maybe look at your diet if it is.

Water alone won’t clean you properly either, you’d need to wash with soap for that.

Theres a few good tips on this thread already (and one monstrous/perplexing one).

Of course it gets it clean. Do you leave bits of poo on your external bum hole?

Any one can install a bidet if they want one they are easily available in bathroom stores.

They are permitted! You just have to have them installed correctly

Bum showers are great.
Until winter and cold pipes come into play🙈

Bte you can install them but it can be faff to adhere to regs. I think they sell them with backflow prevention now. Everysummer we pondwr, everywinter we change our minds😂

A shared poo flannel you rinse 😳🤢

You can they have them in hotels. I always worry about a jet up your arse causing a UTI though

And just like that, all bowel disease and other illnesses with bowel complications were eradicated by the aptly named @WisdomBiscuit

I wouldn't use a bidet in a public toilet if that's what you are suggesting, of course you can have one at home.

Stop worrying about how other people clean their arse, it’s weird

We call them bum guns. We brought one back from SE Asia a few years ago. The only issue is that the water pressure over here is a bit higher than there...
People have plumbed in urinals in their home toilets too. It keeps the toilets and floors clean.

When I last went in holiday there was a bidet and I'm not sure if they all have these I can't remember, a tap on a hose attached coming from wall to wash yourself with (usually I think taps are on the bidet itself?)

The first thing I thought is I wonder how often that hose is cleaned by the maids. I bet it never is.

Bidets in hotel en suites seem to be getting less and less common, in my experience. I've seen photos in TripAdvisor of rooms before and after and they often have taken the bidet out after refurbishment.

I've got an electronic toilet that washes and drys with a heated seat and sensors for touchless lid and seat lift.

I love it and miss it very much when I go to other conveniences.

Wtf?

Huh! Please correct me if I’m wrong (I pray I am)

you are all sharing the same flannel to wipe yourselves with after a no2?

rinse and repeat?

Everyone seemed to have them in the UK in the 80’s whose houses I went to. We had one in the main bathroom too.

You can get little shower attachments to your loo which can be used to rinse with after a visit. Or you can get those all singing all dancing Japanese toilets not sure how much they cost though. Or you can buy a peri bottle which you fill with warm water and direct at your nethers. Useful for post partum mums or people with bowel issues. There are also sitz baths which fit over your toilet seat and you fill with water and bathe yourself. A separate bidet is nicer though.

Everyone on MN does odourless ‘ghost poos’ that leave no trace. Anything else would be uncouth.

We have a Japanese loo. Which we bought for the lolz but which we all love! Doesn’t take up extra space like a bidet either

OP might have an average size UK bathroom, aka tiny! I couldn't fit one in mine.

I've been saying this for years OP! A friend of mine had one installed when she got her bathroom redone - much bigger house than mine! I'm jealous of a bidet 😂

unhygienic and gross ways in the UK? Tell me you’ve never travelled, without telling me you’ve never travelled.

the UK is beautifully clean.. go look round the world, dear, then get back to us.

I’ve been round the world thanks @PetChipGirl. I’m not doing some kind of comparative A level Geography project, I’m talking about what I think would be nicest.

THis is the answer

https://www.amazon.co.uk/HAPPYPO-Easy-Bidet-Travel-Portable-Hygiene/dp/B07GBS74KF

Genuinely the best thing I bought last year, and under £15. Honestly I am a total convert, having coveted a bidet for ages, but ruled it out on the basis of space/expense.

I recently had friends visit from Asia and they were pretty horrified by our lack of bidets! I once used a Japanese toilet that had warm water sprays for your front and back end and I've never felt cleaner. Vowed to get one myself until I saw the price! Until I become a millionaire, I'll stick with my emollient soap