AIBU to think this dinner spread will be enough for nine?

[geminicancerean]

Nine people for dinner tomorrow, 6 adults, 3 kids. It’s going to be really hot. 5 of the guests will have travelled some of the day.

I’ve actually been unwell this week so have relied on M&S to do the actual work. DH isn’t sure my planned spread is going to feed everybody so I’d like some opinions

I have bought:
2 quiches (one bacon and cheese, one cheese and onion)
2 packets hot flaked salmon
Ingredients for big Greek style salad (cucumber, tomatoes, red onion, feta etc)
Big bag of green salad
2 big pots of pasta, pesto and pine nut salad
6 sausage rolls
Big bag of M&S wotsits
Big bag of M&S bacon crisps
Huge double punnet of strawberries
Meringue nests
Cream
oh and cake

The sausage rolls and crisps are for whoever wants them but I obvs had the kids in mind picking those - I know all three kids like these things and eat them.

So that’s it. I think it’s enough. DH suspicious and thinks we might need ‘extras’.

Over to you Mumsnet (don’t worry, I’m braced for criticism and I can take it!)

Is that a Nigella recipe? 🤔 🍗 🍗 🍗

Maybe it is more of a pound cake than a sponge?
9 pounds of butter
9 of sugar
9 of handmilled flour
9 acres of coconut trees
90 mangoes
And so forth

Haven’t laughed at a post as much as this since the bobble plate , link to save you searching.

thanks OP for continuing to engage despite severe provocation
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/mumsnet_classics/636548-A-plate-has-fallen-down-the-back-of-the-loo?reply=12959469

Wonderful! You should be fine then. Maybe he knows you often underestimate the amount of food needed for them all? Or maybe he was just being polite. Hope you have a great afternoon

A quiche serves four usually so that's not even enough for one slice per person. But I guess some might not like it.

6 sausage rolls, again less than one each? I know you say for the kids but others might like them too.

As PP said, some nice bread and a few cheeses could help?

Thank you for letting me know.

6 sausage rolls between 9? Only 2 quiches. That's just not enough. A couple of french sticks, pate and cheeses and another packet of sausages rolls and another quiche. A lot of men would happily eat half a quiche with salad on their own.

Oops! Sorry. I thought I had read all your posts this morning, but I missed the one where you said it was cancelled. I hope you feel better soon @geminicancerean

While I agree there's not enough on the OP's list, this is actual, real food! Wtf else is it?

@geminicancerean you’ve got the patience of a fucking saint.

This thread is full of complete and utter twattery, and none of it from you.

This thread is brilliant. Making me cackle on holiday. Well done OP and many other posters for their brilliant replies, and thanks to the batshit posters for their batshittery xx

Clearly I made horrible flat cakes 👩🏼‍🍳

My boots have never been shinier 😏

From picky bits to licky boots
A summer of Mumsnet recipes

Or some posters are really into whipping the air

What are the children supposed to eat?

Won’t someone think of the children !!

Ordinary children or ones that eat their own bodyweight in strawberries?

@Scottsy200

youre right… OP make some chicken nuggets and chips for the kids

OP, whilst I'm sure you didn't mean to do it, thanks for the laughs on this thread! The amount of food some people seem to think you need for a nice tea seems bonkers to me.

I hope you feel better soon and have a lovely time with your family.

Gruel, like all impressionable youths, discourages hedonism from an early age. No seconds in my house either!

Gruel? They're lucky! In my house they'd all get a bit of sawdust and they'd be grateful!

House, you say. House.
If my guests have any fingernails, they'll be scraping rust from the gutter for their tea.
That's how we do salmon flakes.

😆💛

Everybody has filled up their plates. This is what got left. Big thanks to DSis and DH for stepping up. Pic next