Is it ok for men to be in the ladies loos if they need to assist a disabled wife?

[someoneelsesshoes]

Not sure if I’m unreasonable to have felt a bit strange about this.

I went to the ladies toilets in a garden centre and there was a man standing by the sinks. I immediately went to walk out as I thought I’ve mistakenly gone into the men’s. He then said sorry and said he was waiting for his wife. He was next to a zimmer frame which I assume was his wife’s.

I felt really strange about this but went into the loo as usual. I understand maybe his wife really needed help to get on/off the loo so dismissed it. She was still in the stall when I left. But when I left the loo I checked the disabled and it was open and ready to use (though maybe it was occupied when she needed it and it was an emergency).

I haven’t come across this before so not sure if we make this concession for male carers. I know disabled people need to be supported and maybe he’s the only one who can help her.

Oh do get real. Are you one of the redditors?

I didn’t say I’m traumatised and I wouldn’t use it as I’m not disabled.

True, you can use the disabled toilet for PTSD. That’s a disability. If it’s too traumatic to see any male at all ever, then don’t dare the women’s loos, use the disabled.

Because she’s not disabled. See how that works? Three types of toilet - men (for men), women (for women) and accessible (for disabled people)

@Imdunfer

No, but if she felt really desperate, maybe she felt she just couldn't wait. She wouldn't be able to predict with any certainty how long the disabled toilet would be in use for.

Nobody gets "flashed with a naked dick" in a men's toilet. They are literally facing the wall, often with side panels. I mean, just look at a photo of a male toilet and try to work out what you are possibly going to see unless you are literally peering round the side of their legs. A man taking their daughter into a toilet is just going to show the girl to the cubicle and they will see absolulely zero penis.

For some women. Others of us would recognise that a father dashing apologetically into a cubicle with, say, a four year old desperate for the loo, is just that. A dad rushing to get his kid to the toilet on time. And likewise an older man with his wife's Zimmer frame, apologising for being there.

Anyway, he's hardly going to rape someone when he has a kid in tow/his wife on the cubicle.

Men do not pull their trousers down to their knees, and certainly not to their ankles at urinals. Assuming we are wearing a pair with flies, the trousers don't get lowered at all.

If we are wearing something without flies, such as tracksuit bottoms, the top of the front side of them just gets put under the genitals. The rear doesn't go down at all.

Claire’s Law is the domestic violence disclosure scheme. Pretty sure by now that you’re just trolling.

No, I’m not on Reddit.

Good grief. Okay what's your solution then Einstein? For a single dad of a 3 year old girl who has no living female relatives?

Bearing in mind, for example, that only 3 out of every 10 of railway stations in the UK have accessible toilets.

Go on, I'll wait.

Decent people do not use disabled facilities if they aren’t disabled. And your dismissive ‘if it’s too traumatic to see any male at all ever’… I almost hope you are a man as that is a vile way to dismiss someone’s concern

and people who aren't disabled using disabled toilets is a reason why you then have a man helping his disabled wife in the ladies or someone like me taking their disabled boy over 8 to the ladies.

This is too far. In your head most men are so repulsive that they’re ’trying to flash their genitalia’ at little girls to get a kick. (Even though this is a fairly rare opportunity you think it’s a significant one for men) Yet at the same time, we should accept these very same men (because who can tell the difference) should actually be allowed in the spaces little girls think are exclusively theirs?

you've jumped the shark - it can’t be a real post

It doesn’t mean accessible people can’t use the men’s or ladies if the disabled are unavailable. And if someone is so genuinely traumatised by the sight of a man with a zimmer frame helping his wife in the toilet then I’d say fair enough that’s a reason to use the accessible toilet.

Use the men’s. It’s not rocket science

I think it's you and others who need to get real.

No men in ladies because they might be perverts.

Fine to take little girls into gents where men are pretty much guaranteed to not be appropriately zipped up as any man should be in the company of children whatever sex they are.

What an insane logic you all have.

Yeah but you'd most likely have child friendly toilets at the child friendly places. Or disabled toilets at less child friendly places 🙄

As per usual, the crazy girls think an old guy standing by the sink with a zimmer frame, waiting for his wife, is a threat to them.

The issue is more places are using trough urinals. There is no privacy. Source my husband before anyone accuses me of lurking in men’s loos.

No it isn’t. If someone did that then all hell would break loose from people saying they shouldn’t use it. And what about the ones with a radar key?

Eh? He takes her to the mens. That’s what men on their own with very little girls do.

loving the fact you think I’m of an Einstein level of intelligence to tell you that! I mean I do have a first in maths but still…

No they don’t. They don’t want men in female facilities under any circumstances.

Jesus. So disabled people should wear a nappy 'just in case'?

This thread is absolutely sickening.

You can't guarantee that.