To tell friend she can't come on holiday if she doesn't pay her share?

[Glitterinthegrey]

My friend and I agreed to go on holiday together in May half term. It's me & my teenager, and her & her three children aged between 11 and 16.

I booked it, and she was meant to give me half of the money. The final date for payment came and she said she didn't have it, so I paid it on the understanding she would pay me back.

She's now saying she won't be able to afford their train tickets if she has to pay me, too. Neither of us drive, so we holiday in coastal towns with good links.

I'm in a better financial position than her, but I still have to work and save to afford holidays. I don't mind subsidising her by paying more than my share, but feel like excpecting me to pay the whole lot is taking the piss.

Would IBU to tell her they can't come if she doesn'tpay at least some of the cost? It feels mean, but equally I don't want to be a doormat.

You won’t be. If her kids miss out that’s on her, don’t take responsibility for something that isn’t yours.

You’re not the reason her kids won’t get a holiday. She’s responsible for that.
don’t pay for her, she’s an adult and needs to sort stuff out for herself.

Oh, look, you've plucked a post out of context just to have a jibe. How inventive of you. Bravo, 👏Bravo... In actual fact it was in reply to a specific post or posts. However, don't let that get in the way of a good pearl clutching.

Take your DC's friends. They will come with spending money and entertain your DC. Win.

This! She was already massively benefiting. No way should you be bankrolling her holiday, better financial situstion or not. How shes acting is nit how friends act.

You aren’t the reason her kids don’t get to go on holiday, she is!

Agree with this. If she's that strapped then covering her share of the holiday will only be the start of it. She won't have money for anything while you're there and you will find it very difficult to refuse if she can't afford to buy her children's meals.

I'm aware of the context. My response is the same.

You aren’t. She is the reason.

Good, I'm happy for you.

You cane out with the “overrun” post out of nowhere. Moot on a thread about a personal matter; you just wanted to shoehorn that in.

So enough with the disingenuous “I was only replying to PPs…”

but you aren’t the reason her kids don’t get a holiday that’s down to their mum who agreed with you she would pay her share but then hasn’t, no doubt hoping you will feel guilty and pick up the pieces. Sorry but that isn’t your job and she needs to manage it with her kids. You are not responsible for them.

This.
She has done this before.
I would be wondering if this is why she remains friends with you.
You are to be used by her.
Not nice.

You’ll be paying for it all once you get there. It’s not your responsibility to give her kids a holiday. Say pay up or I’m asking someone else. Next time get money up front BEFORE you book.

If she can only afford the train tickets by not paying you for the holiday, she can’t afford to go! How’s she going to afford to eat, drink or do anything when you actually get there?!

What a piss taker.

I agree

You are talking about migrant workers and Windrush generation. This isa thread about someone not paying the OP holiday money owed to her for them all to go on holiday together.
So no it's not relevant to the thread as the poster you picked on has quite rightly pointed out to you.
So bravo to you for getting it wrong.👏

You carry on resurrecting things you think should be buried pages back. It's up to you...

Say what?

You replied to a PP around an hour ago. I replied to you.a few minutes later.

I believe the traditional gap before we can call it a resurrection is a little longer than that.

She’s taking the absolute Mickey, tell her straight, she should be paying more with three kids than you with one, if she couldn’t afford it she should have said at the outset.

If you cant get anyone else to go with you just go with your own family.
I would tell her that she needs to make her own plans when she can afford it.
If she cant afford it already how is she going to fund her family activites / food etc ? Guess who YOU !

I would just say "I realise that things are tight, but I can't afford to pick up the tab for the whole thing now that I have paid for all of us. Can we agree a plan to pay me back?"

Still at it, I see. You need to let things go. You're beginning to look like a neurotic shrew.

Oh, personal attacks, is it?

Lovely. Nige would be proud of you.

And the Left never name call, do they, Sheil....? Let it go, for your own good, please...