To be furious with DH for this?

[Coffeecherrymama]

First night home since giving birth and DH has gone out with his mates drinking and still isn’t home and he isn’t answering any calls or messages. He didn’t give me any choice, he just said he was going out with his “mates” and then left and said he would be back before 10pm but he’s still not home! I’m so angry that he has just left me here with our newborn when he knows I’m struggling but his mum says I’m overreacting and that he’s “entitled to a night out”! I feel like I could just cry to be honest! AIBU?

@Coffeecherrymama did you MEAN tickets for Ibiza? Did you mean Ibrox? (Scottish football ground)

OP isn’t though

Ibiza! I’m absolutely raging, feel so angry but so upset too

What a complete scumbag he is. The apple clearly didn't fall far from the tree if his deadbeat mum's attitude is anything to go by. I wonder what she would have thought if she had a baby at home and a newborn and come back from the hospital and your father in law left her alone to go to the pub all night. How would she feel then? Maybe she needs to remember what it was like to have a young child at home and newborn at home on the first day.

He is garbage! He should love you enough to want to look after you on your first day at home! He should be cooking for you and wanting to be there! I'd tell him you are very serious right now about getting a divorce because you didn't realise what a deadbeat husband and father he would turn out to be, and if he goes to Ibiza, you WILL be filing for divorce and to bet on it, don't call your bluff.

Do you have a father that can read the riot act to him and put the fear into him?

Who said anything about getting another man

How has he 'earned it'? The OP is the one who was pregnant, risking her health in pregnancy, probably morning sickness and other health issues, then painful long labor and childbirth. What did he do? Fuck all other than 8 seconds pleasure and no health issues at all for 9 months. An easy ride. No change for him. Nothing. Seriously, what on earth has he done to 'earn' it? If anyone's earned anything, it's the OP!
OP, I think we have some Mens Rights Activists on this thread. Ignore them.

Has he not mentioned this?!?!? He is planning a trip to Ibiza in 2 days time??

If he goes then I'd be packing his bags and taking them to his parents house.

Plan A- let him go to Ibiza ,change locks. get your sister to pack his stuff & take to his mums. Realise its over.

Plan B- same as plan A

Most couples don't have that age gap so I'm not sure why you thought that! You repsonses reek of the manosphere way of thinking, you dont appear to live in the real world. And if you think he's entitled to behave this way in front of his children then you're clearly not a parent. Going to the hospital every now and then does not justify his behaviour. Judging by your other responses you're on the wind up and definitely a troll, most probably a male one.

go back to reddit, incel

You are a better person than me I would lick the door and if he threw a paddy I would call the police . He can go sleep at his moronic mums house

If he had just had surgery on his bollocks would you have left him at home with a one day newborn and another child to go drinking

There is your answer

I don't say this lightly but that would actually be the end for me. The disrespect is fucking unreal

You are just making stuff up. There is no evidence that he has 'been down the hospital no end and supportive for months'. In fact, the evidence points to him being a spoilt, self-centred and selfish mummy's boy who does what he wants without caring about the consequences for his wife and children.

What on earth makes you imagine this random scenario that has no bearing on the ops situation?

@ElatedPinkSeal i just read your expected age gap? Why the fuck do you expect a 15 year age gap?!

calm down! I’m just speaking from my experience. Nothing wrong with that age gap! Didn’t read the full thread originally and yes it does sound a lot worse now and uacceptable. I thought he had simply gone on a night out - the stuff about coming back in that state and the trip away is clearly unacceptable

Im confused why he has a physical ticket for Ibiza… wouldn’t that be on his phone?

Ummm wow just wow isnt ibiza the gaycation spot??

I would have kicked the shit out of him whilst he is so drunk and unable to move then rub his head in his sick (i probably wouldn't really as I have emetophobia) then I would drag him outside leave him there in the pavement and rip up his tickets to ibiza. And yes you should divorce him!

Ibiza is a clubbing island. You're thinking of Mykonos.

I feel for you. It would be good if your sister could stay and give you some support. You say he is not normally like this but if he has a ticket for Ibiza, there seems to be other things going on. Leave him to sweat for a day or two and see if you can work things out. Do not engage or take calls from his mother, it sounds like she is facilitating/encouraging his behaviour.

He is a scumbag who isn’t ready for kids. He’s young to have a family and is probably regretting his choices. What an idiot. I think you’ll be better off without him tbh. His mum sounds rough as well. I hope your sister can support you a bit.

Lock the fu#@*ng door and leave a note for him to go to his mother’s! And, if you’re up for taking him back … it’s payback time, BIG TIME ! I hope you can feel the warmth of the sympathy you’re getting on here. Best wishes from me for you, your DC and new baby.

I thought he had simply gone on a night out

The fact is that the OP had just came back from hospital giving birth! Common sense and morals say a father would be home for the mother of his child on the first night she returned home from the hospital giving birth!!! That does not need explaining to anyone even a quarter decently raised properly. He could have gone out a month from now. He should have been home with her, cooking for her, making her a cup of tea, running her bath etc for that FIRST NIGHT HOME.

Your MIL is an absolute bellend