Daughter didn’t enjoy holiday

[Personil]

DH and I went on holiday with my DD (11). When asked if she enjoyed the holiday she says it was ok but was ruined by being left on her own for 2 hours every day. What she’s referring to is when we went for a siesta. Months later she’s saying she wouldn’t want to go again. WWBU?

So generally our days were up around 8ish, down for breakfast then activities in the morning were pool, markets, beach etc

back to hotel at 2ish, slept until 4 then down for dinner around 5ish.

Evening entertainment every evening then back to room around 9pm

TV wasn’t great as it was all in Spanish but she did have books and there were occasions where she went down to the pool by herself if DH and I watching to relax in the room/on the balcony.

She doesn’t really have any friends that are close enough to bring on holiday and she wouldn’t have gone to a kids club even if there was one.

OP doesn't say she "only" had books to entertain herself. She may well have had other stuff, e.g. magazines, puzzles, drawing paper, games, craft stuff.

What's so boring about books? I must say, at that age I was delighted if I could get a couple of hours' peace to read.

I'm curious what her granny is like - does she nap? is granny likely to be entertaining her non stop? does granny go out and about all the time?

They’re a delight and health experts highly recommend napping. The worst aspect of them though is if you don’t wake naturally from it and are woken by an outside force. That can turn a refreshing nap into sluggishness for me.

After school she just reads dog books so not much different really

Who takes magazines, puzzles, drawing paper, games and craft stuff on holiday - you only have a certain space and weight limit in the suitcase.

Of course if she was at home, she would easily be able to entertain herself.

But of course being in a room with absolutely nothing to do apart from read a couple of books is going to be boring.
Once you’ve read them then what do you do.

Of course if she was at home, she would easily be able to entertain herself.

OP says at home she chooses to read......

I can see her point, it seems like the holiday was geared towards you and your DH more than her.
You say you did activities in the morning but then some times she would go to the pool herself while you relaxed, that’s not only boring for an 11 year old but also quite dangerous.

I can imagine a scenario where she's made loads of mates in the hotel, wants to be out playing and having fun, and has 2 hours of enforced silence every afternoon, she is allowed to say she didn't enjoy that.

My dc won't have a holiday nap either, so they are still tired by say 9pm.

her grandma has more energy than I do 😂 she loves staying there

The oddest thing here is dinner at 5 and bedtime at 9 tbh

I don't see anything wrong with this. I would of been happy to sit on the balcony with a bag of lays a fanta lemon and play on my phone for a couple of hours to get out of the heat of the day. You are doing things from the moment you get up and then doing things in the evening and having a lot later better then usual. Holidays are for everyone. So everyone should get to do what they want to do.

Then maybe it's best she does stay there. I wouldnt be taking her next time.

I would expect an 11 year old to be capable of entertaining herself for 2 hours.
Go for a walk? Play a game? Watch Tv? Read a book?

Gosh I think that's sad.

Surely, spending time with your child (or children) is what holidays are for. Especially as young as 11.

You don't sound as if you like your daughter very much tbh. Didn't you notice she was unhappy while you were away? Couldn't you have changed the routine to make it nicer for her? It's her holiday too! It sounds as if you and your DH decided what to do and she was just tagging along.

I hope she has a lovely time with Grandma and gets thoroughly spoiled for a couple of weeks!

Wow. When I was eleven I could be left alone all day and I'd be perfectly happy keeping myself amused. This was before the internet and cell phones, too. My kids were the same. They had no trouble filling up a couple of idle hours. As my dear old mum used to say, doesn't your daughter have any inner resources?

I use to and still do take magazines on holiday and we always take travel games

I think she showed great maturity and self-awareness by admitting to you that she didn’t enjoy the holiday. And finding a solution by saying next time you go and enjoy yourself , I will stay with grandma.
I must admit I would feel sorry for my daughter if she was the only child on the holiday and then denied any devices and left alone for 2 hours every day so that adults can sleep. But we all parent differently.
If it was me I would thank her for her honesty and say I’m sorry you didn’t enjoy the holiday. I would then either let her stay with relatives and go on adult holidays in future or adjusted the holiday to be more fun and child-centred.

I think that overall it sounds quite a boring holiday & the 2hrs alone was maybe what she picked on the explain why she didn't enjoy it?

If she didn't enjoy it, she didn't enjoy it. As for the "poor children who don't get holidays" its the same as "the children starving in Africa" who apparently would have been grateful for my school dinner.

I think it’s because she’s on her own. My mum used to regularly take herself off for naps at home but we liked it because we (siblings) got a bit of free reign together to do what we like. Looking back I can see she was probably just trying to escape us for a couple of hours but for us it was a fun social time together without being monitored.

Presumably she has more books to read at home.

She also had other things to do if she ever gets bored of reading.

She must have been incredibly bored on holiday, if she’s genuinely someone that can entertain herself by reading at home but hates it so much that she doesn’t want to go again.

I don't think it is. When we were kids, we entertained ourselves all the time. I would have easily read a book for two hours or drawn or done puzzles or something.

Siestas are normal in half the world and kids manage to survive!

but were you left alone all day in a hotel apartment? That's very different from being at home.

Truly shocking. I’m shocked.