Daughter didn’t enjoy holiday

[Personil]

DH and I went on holiday with my DD (11). When asked if she enjoyed the holiday she says it was ok but was ruined by being left on her own for 2 hours every day. What she’s referring to is when we went for a siesta. Months later she’s saying she wouldn’t want to go again. WWBU?

Ok I missed that quite important detail. I maintain that i don't think its unreasonable for an 11 year old to be left to 'chill' during the hottest part of the day, especially if the rest of the holiday is varied and child friendly enough. However expecting her to just twiddle her thumbs for 2 hours is a bit unrealistic. Kids have changed and they do find it a lot more difficult to amuse themselves without screens, not like us in the good old days.

Well, that would be a legitimate reason for resting.

My comment was directed towards people who take naps during the day for no apparent reason.

Two hours! One hour nap is plenty whilst she could watch tv. Then you could all enjoy quality time together. At 11 she can’t go in pool safely. Sounds a bit selfish( unless you are both ill or very elderly?)

Also I have an illness where have to nap pm for One hour. If you are so ill you both need two hours nap a day in the afternoon leaving no supervision for child how are you well enough for a holiday?

Ehmm… Going against the grain here. Parents having a 2 hour nap in the Med, in high summer is the norm for millions of children From time immemorial. Children are meant to nap too or entertain themselves. Most, well all, do get bored, but soon learn to entertain themselves quietly. Books are wonderful inventions… 😜 To me, the issue is that DD used the word “ruined”. That’s dramatic and suggests a little entitlement. She’d get short shrift from me.

This sounds like a couples holiday. Not a family holiday

Why would you go to he room for 4 hours when you are only up and out 13 hours in a day. Do you have health conditions that make you both tired.

Take a book to the pool and sleep on a sunbed. You don't seem to have concerns about her swimming alone so this would give you all what you need.

Dinner from 5-6 is really early and then bed by 9, why just why? Was there no evening entertainment?

We’ve always had siesta on holiday. Parents definitely weren’t bonking. Managed to read books during siesta for 11 years of holidays without trauma, until I was either old enough to stay by the pool by myself, or buy cocktails.

Don’t think I’ve ever gone for a siesta when on holiday with kids, so boring for them

Nah, you literally said, and I quote "the only real excuse for sleeping during the day as an adult is if you work nights."

I agree that siesta is normal on the continent, parents and children, most shops close then everything is open in the evening and children stay up later.

We are just not used to that way of life, we have far less hot weather and are more inclined to get up late in the morning when not at work and stay up all day.

I was the sort of child who liked to read a lot and would have been happy to go to bed with a book - and would probably have slept for a while - but not all kids are like that. You can't force sleep.

Next year it would be better to have a different type of holiday.

Really weird that you would shut the door on your daughter for two hours in the middle of the day. Yes, I agree about indoor time (I’m very pale) but she must have felt very closed out.

People who go out on day trips manage to stay awake. Surely not everyone stays close enough to their hotel everyday so they can nip in for their afternoon nap?

What makes you think that sitting in a manky school toilet involved ‘choice’? Or because I’m an ‘introvert’? I had no real choice in the matter

Feel abit sad for this kid. Certainly doesn’t deserve the “entitled” “spoilt” comments imo.

Whole scenario puts me in mind of a girl in dd1s primary class. Her parents really weren’t that interested and did right by her (just) but basically carried on as they did pre kids. We all felt abit sorry for her. They would go off to festivals together and leave her with a disinterested male lodger when she about 9 or 10 - their holidays very also couple focussed. Bumped into her recently she’s actually turned into a lovely young adult.

When I was 12 we went to Spain and my parents did the exact same thing. They went for a nap everyday for 2 hours and I can honestly say I still remember how bored I was for those 2 hours. I’m 49 now and it stuck with me, I could never do that to my kids as it’s their holiday too.

This post is ridiculous in some answers no wonder this new generation is so self absorbed , has no resilience and is so much more entitled .
so the kid is bored 2 hours !!! And? Where has any child psychologist said boring is bad , quite the opposite , let her be bored , let her find something to do , let her not find every minute if a holiday amusing . That’s how it should be , life is not perfection , life involves others needs and likes not just our own . I have 3 kids we do holidays abroad every year , we take their needs , their likes and their opinion in consideration, but I’m sure at some stages not all of them are happy , neither am I neither is my husband ! That’s life ! Stop worrying about every single thing . Remind your child many neve been abroad , many don’t have food daily , many have no luxuries , teach them to have perspective and realise how privileged they are .

Did op clarify whether her husband is DD's dad. I suspect he isn't and she felt like a spare part.

Jesus wept 🫣 2hrs a day 🫢 think about us kids back in the day with 'Ethnic' parents dragged every school holiday to some rancid cess pit to 'discover our roots'! My 11 year old me would have killed for 2hrs in a place with electricity, running water and food that not on the endangered species list!

All this but children that live there. Well that’s their normal catching a nap then a late night. Notice no actual late night for op.

But at home, or again the children that live there. They have their stuff.

Also zero siblings or other children. Just one child alone with nothing but a couple of books basically.

I'd feel exactly the same way... I probably would have said that myself at that age

The thread where “forty winks” turns into “forty wanks” 🤣🤣🤣

Ungrateful?

Poor kid was probably feeling isolated and lonely. No siblings or cousins to play with, and probably didn’t have the opportunity to make friends with other kids in the hotel/resort if she was being taken up to the hotel room every afternoon so her parents could nap.

Sounds like a fucking tragic holiday.

Is this her dad or step dad? That feels relevant as it comments on how isolated the child may have felt.

No bother, Mum of The Year....👏