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AIBU?

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Colleague warning me off reporting inappropriate group chat

228 replies

JutrScot · 23/04/2026 20:33

I’ve been made aware (with evidence) of some male colleagues who have a non work group chat with each other in which sexualised comments have been made about me and other colleagues.

The colleague who made me aware of this has said there’s no point reporting this as 1. It’s a non work group chat with messages outside of working hours and 2. Incase of any implications on our own careers.

I want to press ahead to report but she has given me some slight doubt. I’d appreciate anyone with a greater grasp of these matters than me giving an indication.

OP posts:
99bottlesofkombucha · 25/04/2026 01:25

My company would investigate this, so would my previous. I’d expect a formal warning to all proven involved, and part of your annual performance going into bonus calcs is a culture score, they’d have to be marked down on that.

southcoastsammy · 25/04/2026 10:37

My company would absolutely investigate this and talk to all parties involved.
We need to speak up about this kind of misogyny, MEN need to speak up about this kind of misogynistic BS too, not turn a blind eye.
its not private and ‘outside’ of work if its colleagues discussing other colleagues and it IS going to affect the work culture - already is seeing as you know about it and will bring those feelings into the workplace.

southcoastsammy · 29/04/2026 07:24

Collective silence, people
worried about over stepping, or consequences or being perceived as a killjoy - this is what allows these misogynistic to flourish.
Most decent companies have a whistleblowing avenue that covers this stuff as well as ‘bigger’ issues like fraud etc.

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