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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Shocked by what my BF did to me

212 replies

Catchase1 · 09/04/2026 19:17

This happened at the weekend but has kind of dragged on to the week. I don’t live with my boyfriend but we’ve been together a few months and we spend every other weekend at one of our houses. We were at mine this weekend just gone. We have a quite ‘jokey’ relationship and banter a lot. On Sunday, he hovered over my face (having taken his shorts down) and broke wind. I was in bed on my phone at the time. I went mad at him and he kept defending it as a joke and says that I always joke about doing it to him. I said yes, a joke. I’ve told him I want space, he has attempted to apologise over messaging and asked to call me. I just feel like it’s a line crossed even if it was done purely as a ‘joke’. Is it me or is that the ultimate disrespect?

OP posts:
SoSadSoSadSoSad · 09/04/2026 19:18

Foul man. Dump.

DiddleyDeeDee · 09/04/2026 19:18

Thats disgusting.

TillyToeTaps · 09/04/2026 19:18

🤮

ohwtf · 09/04/2026 19:18

Any man who did that to me would get a swift punch to the bollocks, and marching orders.

Zanatdy · 09/04/2026 19:19

Gross, disrespectful and not something that i’d find remotely amusing. YANBU.

HoppityBun · 09/04/2026 19:20

My ex did this. Looking back, he hated me.

Villanousvillans · 09/04/2026 19:20

Utterly disgusting. There would be no way back for me, after that.

TikTokker · 09/04/2026 19:20

You joke about doing it to him? I mean it’s disgusting and I wouldn’t put up with it but I also wouldn’t say I’d do it either.

AgentPidge · 09/04/2026 19:20

It's in really poor taste but it sounds as if he doesn't know where you draw the line. If he's apologised and learnt his lesson, I'd forgive him.

rwalker · 09/04/2026 19:20

That’s grim but not totally unexpected as you threaten to do it to him so that kind of sets the tone really

PinkNailPolish2026 · 09/04/2026 19:21

Dump him. Imagine being intimate again with someone like that. Yuk.

Illbefinejustbloodyfine · 09/04/2026 19:22

rwalker · 09/04/2026 19:20

That’s grim but not totally unexpected as you threaten to do it to him so that kind of sets the tone really

I agree with this. He knows now.

Classiclines · 09/04/2026 19:33

Absolutely disgusting from your .bf
But I find the fact you " joke ' about doing it pretty gross as well.

I honestly fail to understand how adults talk to each other, and behave, in the manner of primary school children.

nomas · 09/04/2026 19:34

He is scum. Dump.

TappingTed · 09/04/2026 19:35

As you joked about it I can see why he’d think that you’d think it was funny. You are both being unreasonably and disgusting tbh.

MrsVanilla · 09/04/2026 19:37

I would have said 'disgusting' if I hadn't read that you actually started it by joking you would do it to him! Sorry, but you had that coming!

Dillydollydingdong · 09/04/2026 19:37

What a strange relationship. Where's the respect? Where's the love? Just humiliation and embarrassment! Yuck!

WallaceinAnderland · 09/04/2026 19:38

Fucking hell he has no respect for you whatsoever does he.

Maray1967 · 09/04/2026 19:38

rwalker · 09/04/2026 19:20

That’s grim but not totally unexpected as you threaten to do it to him so that kind of sets the tone really

Yes, what he did was grim, but why on earth were you joking about doing it to him? He’s probably assumed from that that it’s ok.

TwistedWonder · 09/04/2026 19:39

Are you both 12?

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/04/2026 19:40

Why would you joke about that?

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 09/04/2026 19:41

The idea that this level of immaturity is carried forward into "adulthood" beggars belief.

PenelopeAsks · 09/04/2026 19:42

God I hate ‘banter’.

Snoken · 09/04/2026 19:44

You joke about farting in his face? But yes, I couldn't muster up any kind of attraction to any man who did that to me so I would call it a day.

Dimpledaisies · 09/04/2026 19:44

You can't joke about doing it to him and then get arsey (haha) when he does it to you. He's said sorry now move on...