Shocked by what my BF did to me

[Catchase1]

This happened at the weekend but has kind of dragged on to the week. I don’t live with my boyfriend but we’ve been together a few months and we spend every other weekend at one of our houses. We were at mine this weekend just gone. We have a quite ‘jokey’ relationship and banter a lot. On Sunday, he hovered over my face (having taken his shorts down) and broke wind. I was in bed on my phone at the time. I went mad at him and he kept defending it as a joke and says that I always joke about doing it to him. I said yes, a joke. I’ve told him I want space, he has attempted to apologise over messaging and asked to call me. I just feel like it’s a line crossed even if it was done purely as a ‘joke’. Is it me or is that the ultimate disrespect?

I’d move on if he’s apologised, you’ve joked about doing it to him before, so I can see why he’d think you’d find it funny.

Nope. Get rid.

This!

I know how people on Mumsnet react to farting generally bit I would have found this quite funny.

Boundaries and respect are important even in the most intimate fun relationships.

But it sounds like there are blurred lines and no boundaries or respect here, where you have joked about something so gross and he has put it into practice.

You are both at fault.

OP, you’re over reacting. Disgusting? Yes. Go mad? Yes. But need space? Over a fart? Just give him what for and make sure he doesn’t do it again.
“what did you guys split up over?”
”oh he farted in my face”

This.

But stop the ‘banter’ nonsense.

I have said it to my boyfriend a few times - mostly if he’s tickling me. However he knows it’s 100% a joke/weak threat (maybe also a real fear……..), I can’t even 💩 when he’s around, let alone any other variation.

I’m not sure if I would end the relationship, it would depend on whether or not I would deem it genuinely just crossed wires and a bad decision? The fact he took down his shorts, though…… it’s a little beyond.

Agree. Foul.

Assuming he’s over the age of 12, that is fucking grim and an absolute no from me.

Really gross. End it. He will embarrass you in future

She didnt do it though, did she? Op joking about it (bit grim) is not actually doing it (absolutely vile)

You're shocked by it yet you've joked about doing it. I can't see how it's that much of a suprise.

Please clarify this bit ‘I always joke about doing it to him’. What exactly are you saying to him? What brought it on the first time you said it?

Agree. You are both as bad as each other.

Absolutely vile behavior from both; you for joking about it in the first place and him for actually doing it.

What sort of person are you to threaten someone with breaking wind in their face?? 🤢

Your partner took it too far but you threatened him with it and maybe he thought your bar was set so low he’d action it. Dump him - learn from this and find some manners.

I’d be horrified but I don’t enjoy toilet humour. If you joke about this sort of thing then maybe he didn't really think he was crossing a line.
One of my friends told me her and her husband will break wind in bed but will quickly pull the covers over the other one so the are “trapped” with the smell. This is my idea of hell but they find in amusing.

I would if it was directly in my face like this. BUT I'd never have said anything that might make someone think otherwise.
As disgusting as it is, I can see why this guy did think it would be laughed off.

I wouldn't joke about this personally but I still think there's a difference between a joke, to actually farting right in someone's face. I feel like if someone joked about doing this to me I wouldn't think it makes it okay to actually do it. But then again I may be biased as I wouldn't joke about it either 😅

This. 💯

Absolutely disgusting all around.

The only man I know to have done this in real life turned out to be an abusive POS.

Get rid.

This surely has moved into "just mates" territory? Messing around like a group of 15yo boys? I don't think anyone would do that to someone they actually fancied.

Why is this even a question?

Just sometimes I get the feeling MN stepped in where the Jeremy Kyle Show left off. It's like a visit to the zoo.

Yes, he's disgusting and yes, you bear some responsibility. Raise your standards.