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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Disgusting neighbour

197 replies

BePinkKoala · 22/02/2026 00:50

So my neighbour pees in his garden everyday instead of using his toilet his garden is right Infront of our front door I walked out at 8 in the morning to take my 7year old daughter to breakfast club and got a full view of his penis in his hand because he has gaps in his fence I did kick off on him and let him know my daughter was with me and he did nothing proceeded to carry on peeing so I've reported him to the council and they aren't doing anything about it he's also been reported to the police who still haven't done anything this was October it's now February I've been told by police I need proof but if I was to get a video or picture of him then I am at risk of going on the sex offenders register

OP posts:
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Ooihuko · 22/02/2026 00:52

Eww, can you record the audio of you talking to him about it if it happens again.

ChuckJacksonIvegottheNeedNSoul · 22/02/2026 00:55

I'd be getting back on to the police.
Doing that is bad enough but when a child is on the go.🤮

Original poster
BePinkKoala · 22/02/2026 00:56

I could but police won't do anything they seem to be just as bad as the council and it's not just me and my daughter at risk of seeing it my daughter's friends play Infront of my house he's just vile I don't know if theirs anyone else that could help deal with him

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Ooihuko · 22/02/2026 01:00

I wonder why he would do that, it's so odd. Surely the police would respond with some evidence

INX · 22/02/2026 01:04

As gross as he is, what crime is he committing by peeing in his own garden?

He’s not deliberately exposing himself to anyone not looking through his fence and it’s not sexual either.

Dazzlemered · 22/02/2026 01:08

Start a paper trail. Email the police copy in your local mp. Ask them why they are failing to protect your daughter and other local children. Does he own or rent?

ItsNeverDuck · 22/02/2026 01:13

INX · 22/02/2026 01:04

As gross as he is, what crime is he committing by peeing in his own garden?

He’s not deliberately exposing himself to anyone not looking through his fence and it’s not sexual either.

But now he knows his penis can be seen by everyone, including the children, anyone who didn’t mean any harm would not continue to pee when they know their penis is exposed to his neighbours and their children. I think the whole things is odd but if I wanted to pretend I’d piss in my the garden, I would not knowingly do it where people can see me, this man knows he can be seen. It’s creepy.

INX · 22/02/2026 01:17

ItsNeverDuck · 22/02/2026 01:13

But now he knows his penis can be seen by everyone, including the children, anyone who didn’t mean any harm would not continue to pee when they know their penis is exposed to his neighbours and their children. I think the whole things is odd but if I wanted to pretend I’d piss in my the garden, I would not knowingly do it where people can see me, this man knows he can be seen. It’s creepy.

Show quote history

Yes fair enough but I wonder if the police would think as he can ‘only’ be seen if someone looks through the gap in his fence, it might be ‘private enough’ if you see what I mean?

Original poster
BePinkKoala · 22/02/2026 01:34

It is deliberate because I've kicked of on him and told him to use his toilet because I had my little girl with me and he carried on he didn't bother to stop or turn around knowing full well a child could have seen him and it takes nothing to use a toilet like a normal person

OP posts:
Original poster
BePinkKoala · 22/02/2026 01:35

Yes it's council house rented

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Rayqueen2026 · 22/02/2026 01:37

Nice to know I'm not the only one, we moved from a house where the guy did this and then started doing it even more when dh was at work and I was pottering in garden...I went thru told council was told nothing can be done his property etc, you could see him clear as day all out while his stinky dog were out to...we moved I got to where I didn't want to go out at all in the garden, if dh was around he never did it

Original poster
BePinkKoala · 22/02/2026 01:41

It's a joke that the council protect dirty scum like these we have been dealing with been in this house 30 years he's been in his house for 6 years but their solution is for us to move house it's a joke

OP posts:
Lavender14 · 22/02/2026 01:45

Have any other neighbours you know experienced the same? If a few could report together then that's more evidence to work with. The housing provider can't evict someone without proof as they need to put it through court and prove the unreasonable behaviour via evidence. So if they only have your word on it their hands are really tied there, but if a few people report and keep a record of when it's happening then that might give a bit more weight behind it. Really the best thing you can do is ring the police next time it happens and tell them he exposed himself to your child. The peeing is not the problem here, the indecent exposure is. If you got a ring doorbell for your back door could it generally record and then you can provide it to police without ever having watched it? I'm not sure where the legality of that would fall but it's a question to ask.

k1233 · 22/02/2026 01:47

Maybe change your complaint to the police from public urination to deliberate exposure of genitals to a minor ie flashing. That may get a different response.

DysmalRadius · 22/02/2026 02:00

It might be a case of making yourself a nuisance until somebody does something - squeaky wheel and all that. Would a ring doorbell record your interactions without actually filming him?

HoppingPavlova · 22/02/2026 02:05

As disgusting as it is, can you not save the drama by putting a screen in your side if the fence to cover gaps you can see through, grow a vine, or a pot of clumping bamboo to screen any large gaps, or any one of many other cheap and easy solutions. Moving, when you have the ability to solve this problem from your side seems very dramatic.

Growlybear83 · 22/02/2026 03:09

I agree that it’s a fairly unpleasant and bizarre thing for your neighbour to be doing, but surely it’s up to him what he does in his own garden? He probably doesn’t expect his neighbours to be peeping at him through the gaps in the fence. Im also wondering just how you can see his penis so clearly through the gap in the fence if he’s holding it in his hand while he’s having a wee - surely his hand is covering most of it? Or is he hung like a donkey?

Gasbox · 22/02/2026 03:15

Which department are you complaining to at the council OP? Just wondering whether reporting as an environmental health concern rather than antisocial behaviour might make a difference?

Notashamed13 · 22/02/2026 03:32

It'll be some sort of grim fetish OP, no advice but YANBU, as pp said maybe try exposure of genitals to a minor.

hoichinny · 22/02/2026 03:56

He’s exposing himself under the guise of ‘undertaking a natural bodily behaviour’. That - or he has mental health issues. This is not typical behaviour. Do not let the police or council minimise it. I would call it ‘exposing to my child’ and I would ask the local police to go and have a chat with him.

ThisCyanPoet · 22/02/2026 04:10

If he’s peeing up against the fence, is it coming through to your side?

I would spray him through the fence with a VERY high powered hose every time he does it and if the council/police turn up you can explain that you were just washing his dirty p*ss away and ask them to go and find out why his genitals are being exposed to a young child via a hole/gap in the fence!

IdentityCris · 22/02/2026 04:35

I've been told by police I need proof but if I was to get a video or picture of him then I am at risk of going on the sex offenders register

No, you wouldn't be.

Nearly50omg · 22/02/2026 05:31

Put up a camera outside that covers that bit of his garden …then you can show that to the police!

leaflikebrew · 22/02/2026 06:13

Ooihuko · 22/02/2026 01:00

I wonder why he would do that, it's so odd. Surely the police would respond with some evidence

He's doing it as he's getting a sexual kick out of it.

It's called being a creep.

PersephoneParlormaid · 22/02/2026 06:26

Get a garden sprinkler an water your garden at the same time he has his wee