The one with the viking cowboy. Are these comments on my appearance terrible or not?

[Onceuponamama]

Short story. Two weeks ago my hair apparently looked "like a viking" wearing a claw clip then this evening "your're not going to like me telling you this but you look like a cowboy".

Two weeks ago I had my hair up in a claw clip whilst cleaning, dh walks into the room and comments "your hair looks like a viking like that". Inside I was like wtf but didn't let on how hurt I felt and just brushed it off.

Fast forward to this evening and I'm trying to find an outfit for tomorrow, we're supposed to be going on a early date for Valentine's day. Nothing fancy just lunch but still wanted to make abit of effort, so I tried on some bootcut jeans, a black cashmere jumper, black low heel boots (not western style) and an oversized cropped tapestry and borg fleece jacket.(no stirrups, hats or chewing on straw in sight) I showed him my outfit and asked if my jeans look ok as I felt abit self conscious wearing tighter style jeans as I normally wear wide leg nowadays. (33 yo mum size 12). Initially he said "yeh you look nice" then said "I don't think your going to like my answer but you look like a cowboy".

That was the second strike for me and I just told him straight that these are horrible ways to describe my appearance and no woman would want to be compared to a viking or a cowboy! He thinks these are perfectly reasonable ways to describe me?!

We barely get to have time to go out just us together these days and I was really looking forward to it but now I just don't want to go at all.

I'm up late venting and contemplating if DH is just clumsy with his words or is there more going on here and he's trying to knock my confidence on purpose? I've finished crying now so just give it to me straight if you think I'm being unreasonable in all of this or not. (I really hope I'm not)

It is a pretty ugly jacket. More suited to a hike then a nice lunch.

Sometimes, fashion isn’t style.

My husband says my winter coat is a granny coat. I've had it many years and it's warm and comfortable but my son was filming us going into the new mega home bargains just opened in my town and oh my god I did look like a granny! From behind my overgrown straggly hair down my back in a ponytail with greys smattered! As soon as I'm getting paid I'll book the hairdresser and buy hair dye. I'll probably still wear the coat though

If he was saying you look like Lagertha in the Vikings I'd take that as a compliment. She is hot!

I don’t think Vikings wear their hair in claw clips but I could be wrong.

My husband says my winter coat is a granny coat. I've had it many years and it's warm and comfortable but my son was filming us going into the new mega home bargains just opened in my town and oh my god I did look like a granny! From behind my overgrown straggly hair down my back in a ponytail with greys smattered! As soon as I'm getting paid I'll book the hairdresser and buy hair dye. I'll probably still wear the coat though

Not quite the same but similar.
I loved my hair and had it to my shoulder blades. Of course any selfie I do is look much much betterengineered so I look at least ok. I saw both the back and front of myself in someone's photo and was really shocked. My hair just looked like rats tails and my teeth were a disgrace.

As soon as I got back from my holiday I asked ny hairdresser to do a casual style bob to above my shoulders and I made an appointment for invisalign. 12 months later I look much better and feel happier in photos.
Is this vain or shallow?
Yes. I dont care though it was worth it!

Tell him he looks like a ballerina

Lol, my DH would say this sort of thing to me, he likes to tease and I'm fine with it, he often makes me laugh. However, if you're not fine with it and it upsets you, find a grownup way to tell him and he should respect that and not repeat. Make sure you do the same with things you do that he doesn't like.

I have to admit, OP, that the mention of an oversized tapestry evoked images of Clint Eastwood,
Sorry 🤣🤣

I would have laughed and called him a cheeky twat.

He did say the outfit was nice too remember. Defo nothing to be upset about.

I quite like the jacket. He sounds clumsy with compliments.

I’m lucky that my current boyfriend wouldn’t dare to be anything other than complimentary to me about outfits.

Why did this make you cry so much? Tell him you know you look fine, and leave it at that.

I have no idea what one's hair looking like a Viking is supposed to mean, anyway.

I used to work in a massive really cold office and one day I went in with a turtle neck jumper on under my jacket.

A colleague remarked as I walked in "oh look, it's Roger Moore!"

Have to say I burst out laughing at the time, I did think it was quite funny but I decided not to wear that combo again.😆

Agree 😂

He sounds very restrictive, bland or repressed in his ideas of style to me and is either really shit at compliments, trying to make sly digs or knows fuck all and should STFU.

Though if someone said I looked like a Viking I'd just say "Thank you!" Ask him what his fashion guru tips are for the coming season.

I tell my DH he looks like Prince Phillip when he wears his light green gilet!

The jacket looks great. (Some of the sheep on here are so desperate to conform that anything vaguely ‘out there’ terrifies the poor wee lambs. 😂😂)

Next time he says something odd about your appearance, just laugh and say “thanks, that was exactly the look I was going for!”

I wood't say cowboy.... but it's giving off retirement-home decor.

He either has a very poor grasp of descriptors or he is deliberately or inadvertently trying to knock your confidence. Stop asking for his opinion. I love the jacket btw.

Every time I wear a striped top my husband has to make the "Hello, Sailor" joke, it's just their way of teasing, a bit annoying but not meant maliciously I think. Don't take it too seriously xxx the jacket is lovely

this made me lol... I love your son.

Ah the good old work place jokes and banter. Sorely missed. Nobody dares to share even the most innocuous of jokes these days lest they offend somebody 🤐

When DP wears a white top, with his longish hair and beard, I sometimes call him Jesus.

Well, you just respond Haha, very funny. And wear it anyway, if you like it, surely? You’re being too sensitive.

Viking women are hot so I don’t see the issue there and your bootcuts and Borg fleece do sound very cowboy. Sorry but he’s just being honest. Also cowgirls are also hot…

Were you wearing it for a bet?

You seem quite sensitive?