To be upset partner going on holiday without me?

[lulu55xxx]

We live together,been a couple 7 years and are getting married next year.
Anyway he works as a manager for a kitchen company and they have branches all through the UK.
The company is taking the top 15 shops China to look at where there products are made etc and have been asked if they want to go.
Everyone in our area has declined but partner said yes as it’s his dream destination…we were planning on going together in a couple of years.
Now look I know I’m probably being ridiculous
It’s a free trip etc etc but I’m sad he’s going without me for two weeks.
Il be stuck here.
Now il be wishing him a nice time and hoping he has a good time but I’m still sad inside he’s going without me.
The assistant manager has declined as he doesn’t want to live his wife for that long but my partner had zero issues saying he would go.

Aibu ?

So he’s going on a business trip, not a holiday?

Its a business trip not a holiday! Hopefully he'll get the chance to do some sightseeing but I'm sure that won't be guaranteed. Sounds like he'll gain some useful product knowledge so I think you need to support him!

You're being wildly unreasonable

I would be upset if my partner didn’t take that opportunity

china is a big place, you can do it together still

YABU

This is a business trip, not a holiday. YABU. 2 weeks is hardly anything, I voluntarily left my partner at home for a 6-week solo travel last year as he didn’t have enough time off work. He also goes away with friends without me. Being in a couple doesn’t mean doing everything together, having individual lives and interests is important

How is it a holiday? But even still are you not able to cope with doing things separately?

I’d be absolutely gutted, but not resentful. What a great opportunity for him. One good thing OP is he will get an idea of what the two of you can do when you go there on your trip.

You’re being completely unreasonable. If I was offered this opportunity by my work and my partner was being negative and not wanting me to go I’d see this as a huge issue.

It’s a business trip, not a holiday. And you’ve used some really needlessly identifying information if what you’ve shared about his job role is true!

It’s normal to feel a bit envious of your partner if it’s somewhere you’ve both wanted to go, but this is a business trip and aren’t you happy for him that he gets to go somewhere nice? Your holiday together will be completely different (unless you both like to spend your holidays looking at kitchen manufacturing plants?!), and definitely still something to look forward to.

Can you go along? Paying for one flight instead of two? I used to tag along on my husband’s work trips sometimes as then we could afford to see more places.

I'm surprised everyone else has declined, very strange. You're being totally unreasonable.

I'd be super excited for DH if he got this opportunity, and genuinely gutted if he decided to decline!

It’s a business trip to a place that’s expensive to get to. I’d bite my bosses arm off!

Do you have kids?

If not, why not look on it as your chance to have one last hurrah of having the house completely to yourself for two weeks before you get married?

I'd be annoyed if my husband turned that down and we have 3 very young kids - it's not a jolly but hopefully he'll get the chance to see some bits and bobs and if for what ever reason you don't make it in a few years he's done it for (almost) free! If you do I'm sure he'll come back with some top travelling tips!

Its not a holiday, and you can still go together, he might find some good places to take you - yabu

Then her partner will be on here complaining about how his intended rubbed his face in with it her YOLO holiday whilst he traipsed round looking at kitchen production factories for a fortnight.

I would think my husband was pathetic if he couldn't leave me for two weeks, especially for a free trip.
YANBU. You can go again.

I think what youre feeling is not jealousy or anger that he is going, but sadness that you;re not going too. Completely natural and normal, but keep supporting him, its a great opportunity and China is not going anywhere....you will still get there together. In fact you may find that he comes back filled with so much enthusiasm for what he's experienced, that the two of you ramp up your effprts to get there and experience it together/

Agree YABU

As others have said, it’s not a holiday is it. He will be working. What a great opportunity for him.

I would take this opportunity to reflect on your own life at this point and your dependence on him. You’re not ‘stuck here’, you can do anything you want.

Not quite 2 weeks but i’m buggering off for later this year for 4 nights without my DH and kids. My DH is going abroad later to see football. Live your life.

He’s not using annual leave or household money if it’s a business trip, so there isn’t that issue. It’s a great opportunity for him. It’s a couple of weeks - arrange to spend time with your friends if you think you’ll be lonely. It’s fine to be a bit jealous, but don’t make him feel guilty for jumping at a business trip which could lead to enhancing his career. As others have said, China is a huge country, it’s not going to spoil the two of you visiting again for a holiday in the future and taking it in together.

Oh I didn’t think she’d tag along for the whole thing. I was more thinking they could fly out together a week early and then she comes home and he does the work part. That’s how my husband and I got to go to India and Japan - we tagged a holiday into the beginning or end of his working time and for the free flight.

It would be a total waste not to go. What a brilliant opportunity for him. I can understand a slight amount of envy, but i would hate to be in a relationship where my partner or I wouldn’t do something like that because we didn’t want to leave the other one.

A bit needy?

Be supportive (rather than ridiculous).