Would it bother you if one person wasn’t drinking at Christmas?

[wakinginthenight]

Dh and I do like to have a few drinks at Christmas and enjoy ourselves.
We are having Christmas at home just family and we all intend to have a good amount of drink, play a few silly party games, music and just let our hair down because it’s Christmas but there is one person who’ll be coming who has requested alcohol free beer as he’s not drinking.
He does drink, he’s just decided he won’t on this occasion.
I feel a bit miffed to be honest that we are all going to be drinking and one sober person will be sitting there watching.
I know IABU but I really wish they would not come if they are just going to sit there and remember everything, I don’t think it helps that they will be here all day and all night.

I’m a non drinker and the amount of judgement I get exactly like this post is ridiculous. Do you think it’s impossible to have fun and enjoy stuff without alcohol? If you’re worried about him remembering stuff you do then it sounds like that’s a you problem, and maybe lay off the drink a little if you always end up embarrassing yourself!

Really?

I think this is easily the most batshit thing I have seen on here and I’m here even before the Mexican house thief.

I don’t drink, DH might have one but usually doesn’t so would we never be invited?

Wanting to have others as drunk as you so you can behave whatever way you want without repercussions is alarming. I echo the previous poster who said you clearly have issues with alcohol when you indulge.

You are the asshole, sorry.

Why does one person choosing not to drink upset you this much? Can you not enjoy yourself without alcohol?

You are being completely unreasonable as I’m sure you know deep down. I drink but its perfectly possible (and many people prefer this) to enjoy yourself without needing to be drunk.

Wanting to exclude people because their idea of fun doesn’t exactly mirror yours suggests either that you and your husband have problems with alcohol, that you are very unimaginative or that you are incredibly controlling. You don’t get to police other people’s ideas of fun.

This person still wants to spend that time with you despite that fact drunk people when you're sober are generally insufferable and you're looking down your nose at them?

You have a drink problem if your idea of drinking is getting in such a state that you feel uncomfortable with someone being sober watching and remembering what you did.

Problematic drinking isn't all about how much or how frequently you drink, it's about what happens when you do drink.

You can have whatever opinion you want but it is a nasty, weird and kind of fucked up opinion. You have a deeply unhealthy attitude to drinking and you are a really bad friend.

OP. Can you explain why you think the person not drinking won’t be able to join in with the silly games and having fun? Do you need to be tipsy to relax enough to have a laugh and play party games? Are they someone who won’t join in things unless they are hammered?

I know you think you don’t have a drink problem because you get drunk rarely, but if you need alcohol to relax and have fun, then you do have a problem.

Treat the sober person like they are drunk.

What atrocious behaviour are they likely to be spectating?
If you're worried about looking like a drunken twat... that's because you're a drunken twat.

How bad is your drinking if a sober person bothers you?

Of all the things to get upset about on Christmas day, who is drinking what is literally not something you should even care about.

The only time someone has tried to bully me into drinking when id rather have tea was from an alcoholic who wouldnt admit that she was one. You're just looking for drinking buddies, you cant control others and take their right to choice away. Judgemental and controlling behaviour

No it wouldn't bother me in the slighest.

You are so unreasonable! Why would he just be a spectator as you put it, can he not join in with the games with his non alcoholic drink? Some people don't need to drink to have fun.

What exactly is your issue? Are you concerned that you might do something embarrassing and he will remember it? If this is the case then perhaps you need to evaluate how much you are drinking.

Why on earth would I need everyone to drink that is really weird thinking it seems very narcissistic

YOU are actually not entitled to ANYTHING. Their life, their decision, and frankly, if you can't see the problem with your attitude, you need help

If you need your guests to drink alcohol so you can have fun there is something very wrong.

It is my business when he’s asked me to buy him non alcoholic beer which I think he could have brought to be honest.
It’s only me and Dh and him and so me and Dh wanted to have a drink together and he’ll be sat there sober and I just feel like I won’t be able to relax while he’s there.

You're being absolutely ridiculous.
I say this as someone who likes a drink!
Who cares what other people do or don't drink?!
You sound like you have issues of your own when it comes to alcohol, deal with them instead of being weird over other people's choices.

Your opinion is unreasonable.

Your feelings are unreasonable.

The kind of people who think you can only be fun when having a drink are the always the ones who are the most boring drunks.
YABU

Your being incredibly ridiculously selfish. People who need to drink in order to have fun are the most boring drunks of them all.

Why would someone not drinking be just a spectator and not joining in with the fun and games? You don’t need alcohol to have a good time or join in games. If you’re only fun when you’ve had some drinks then that is a problem.

Yeah, right. That's what most people with drink problems say..deny, deny, deny.
Something else that people with drink problems usually say is that non drinkers aren't any fun to be around, will spoil their fun, it's impossible to have fun without drinking alcohol etc, etc.

But of course you think you and dh don't have a drink problem🙄

Absolutely this