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Original poster

DP putting his foot in it when meeting my friends for first time

286 replies

Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:50

I moved away from my hometown a few years ago for work, so don’t get back often. However I met up with friends over the weekend and introduced them to my DP. He rather put his foot in it, but swears it was nerves and he meant nothing by it. To not be too graphic, he basically told one of my friends that his ex would ‘allow’ a specific sex act at Christmas and on his Birthday. I wasn’t part of said conversation, but my friend told me and he admitted it. My friend said it was barely relevant to their conversation. Would you give him the benefit of the doubt if he’s otherwise been a great partner? Or do you think it’s a sign?

OP posts:
ItsameLuigi · 01/12/2025 20:52

If it was relevant I'd still find it really fucking odd because why is he thinking about sex with his ex lol. But the fact it wasn't relevant ? Gross tbh 🤮

Franklyannoyed · 01/12/2025 20:53

wtf that’s so icky , who gets nervous so decides to come over all pervy.

BlondeBonBon · 01/12/2025 20:53

Bit weird! Has he given a wider context to the conversation, to put it context

firstofallimadelight · 01/12/2025 20:53

How long have you been together? If he genuinely is great in all other ways I could let it go but I would be clear it’s not acceptable. And I’d be keeping an eye on things for the foreseeable

Original poster
Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:54

The context appeared to be about my friend being so full to do anything over than want to nap by the time Christmas Day evening comes around. DP then made the comment about what he’d do at that time. Really odd I know

OP posts:
Original poster
Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:54

firstofallimadelight · 01/12/2025 20:53

How long have you been together? If he genuinely is great in all other ways I could let it go but I would be clear it’s not acceptable. And I’d be keeping an eye on things for the foreseeable

10 months give or take

OP posts:
outerspacepotato · 01/12/2025 20:54

WTF.

Asshole move

Your friends will dislike him because he's a perv asshole

shhblackbag · 01/12/2025 20:54

I would have been so grossed out and kept a close eye on how he treated my friend.

BadgernTheGarden · 01/12/2025 20:57

Was there a lot of drinking involved in the meeting, it sounds like daft talk after a few.

TheAutumnCrow · 01/12/2025 20:57

Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:54

10 months give or take

Show quote history

Nah, that’s time to say goodbye.

And make sure your friends know you dumped him.

Original poster
Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:58

BadgernTheGarden · 01/12/2025 20:57

Was there a lot of drinking involved in the meeting, it sounds like daft talk after a few.

He’d had a couple of pints at that point but was driving so that was all.

OP posts:
shhblackbag · 01/12/2025 20:59

And in your place? I'd be completely weirded out. So many men apparently think it's OK to talk to their partner's friends about sex. It's really not. It's ick-inducing.

TheRealMagic · 01/12/2025 20:59

Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:54

The context appeared to be about my friend being so full to do anything over than want to nap by the time Christmas Day evening comes around. DP then made the comment about what he’d do at that time. Really odd I know

So totally unprompted. If this is the kind of thing he's saying to your friends as soon as you're not listening god only knows what he's saying to other people when you're not around at all

gamerchick · 01/12/2025 21:02

A bloke or a woman for that matter, talking about sex acts the first time.meeting someone is always going to be hard work. You'll be in edge in mixed company before long.

manicpixieschemegirl · 01/12/2025 21:03

There’s not a single reason for him to have made that comment. He’s a creep.

icantbelieveitsnotcake · 01/12/2025 21:04

Fuck me, he is bringing up sex acts with his ex in conversation when meeting your friends for the first time?

What is wrong with him? there are thousands, nay, millions of topics to talk about with people you've only just met and none of them involve talking about sex acts with your ex.

Whats he going to talk about when he meets your parents for the first time eh?- is he going to tell them what you like to do in bed?

Good grief, this is a huge red flag. Something very wrong here.

Lmnop22 · 01/12/2025 21:06

If the sex act was with you and conversation was going that way after a few drinks, maybe it’s forgivable.

But to talk about what him and his ex used to do together in a conversation where he is actively trying to be on his best behaviour and impress your friends is such a massive red flag as to what he’s like with his own friends or when not on best behaviour…..

RosesAndHellebores · 01/12/2025 21:09

I'm sure you will have a nice christmas as a singleton op. Your christmases future won't be great if you stay with him

SquareHead37 · 01/12/2025 21:14

Men always say it was nerves when they’ve been caught acting creepy.

I think he fancied your friend and was trying to impress her and was hoping she’d join in talking about her own shenanigans. He’s weird and creepy.

CorvusPurpureus · 01/12/2025 21:15

Plus he shouldn't be having 'a couple of pints' if he's driving. No, chuck this one back, he's a dickhead.

BlueEyedBogWitch · 01/12/2025 21:17

Bin.

Nearly50omg · 01/12/2025 21:19

Have a read on the women’s aid domestic abuse and how to spot the red flags for it - things like this are major red flags

Thewalrusandthecarpenter · 01/12/2025 21:20

Putting your foot in it equates to getting someone’s name wrong or laughing at an inappropriate moment. This is a foot with a billowing red flag atop it.

shhblackbag · 01/12/2025 21:24

CorvusPurpureus · 01/12/2025 21:15

Plus he shouldn't be having 'a couple of pints' if he's driving. No, chuck this one back, he's a dickhead.

This, too!

AlloaintheMiddle · 01/12/2025 21:26

CorvusPurpureus · 01/12/2025 21:15

Plus he shouldn't be having 'a couple of pints' if he's driving. No, chuck this one back, he's a dickhead.

This. Plus being a sleazy pig. I mean… do you really need to ask?

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