DH being cruel to small fish

[linaplatelover]

DH is part of a team sport - has been for years no issues usually with it.

he has brought home a small ‘goldfish’ in a tiny tank. This small fish has been passed around different team members. Apparently if it dies on your watch you have to pay a fine.

the fish clearly isn’t being cared for properly, the water is cloudy it has no filter or air stone.

Ive looked up the type of fish and it’s not even a goldfish - it’s a small orange tropical fish that requires a heater.

I'm absolutely furious! I hate any cruelty to animals and think this type of lads game from a 40 yr old man is ridiculous.

first off mumsnetters AIBU? And if you think no what should I do?

worst part is that DH agrees that it’s cruel but for some reason ‘doesn’t want to cause a fuss’

I wouldn’t even bother to tell them it died. Tell them it deserves better and either rehome it or give it the care it needs.
Call them out on it. Someone needs to.
Absolute idiots.

He’s a twat of the highest order. I’d buy all the relevant stuff the fish needs to have a good life, make him pay for it and tell him the fish was staying. If he tried to argue? I’d tell him to fuck off permanently. I would rather keep the fish than such a spineless turd.

Yes it's cruel if it was me I would get a more appropriate tank and everything it needs and refuse to hand it back. Poor little fish.😥

We don’t eat goldfish and chips no. What’s your point here ? There’s a world of difference between eating properly caught and processed fish, and passing round a helpless little creature kept in shitty conditions for some childish lads’ game from grown men who should know better.

I'd be really disgusted if my dp was too cowardly to stand up against animal cruelty.

But if he really can't stand up for what's right, then I agree you could pretend it died and pay the fine.

I'd definitely lose respect for someone doing this!

If your DH agrees it’s cruel then it’s on him to adopt it and get it into a clean and appropriate tank. If he doesn’t, you should. And tell him he’s on double secret probation for any other signs of cruelty to helpless creatures.

I have 2 aquarium and I really look after my fish. I really hate animal cruelty.
Those blokes are stupid bastards and need to grow up ffs. Take the fish to a pet shop and see if they will take it ASAP.
I would be so ashamed of my DH if he did this.

If he pretends it died they’ll just get another one to torture. Your DH needs to take a flipping stand

Apart from farmed salmon.

Not that I condone the OP's DH but I do think there are a lot of double standards on this thread.

No animal should be left to suffer needlessly but anyone who has eaten meat in a restaurant or in processed non tracable food will have contributed to animal suffering.

I would personally be giving the poor fish as quick death.

Don't be silly, there's no comparison.

Ah, a Vegan has entered the chat.

Let's not bother and flush it down the bog now. Because the Vegans don't want us to be hypocritical and care about a non edible series of fishes that are being neglected for entertainment purposes.

So you've found yourself married to a man child, who is a wet lettuce and can't make a fuss for the sake of a defenceless animal and a stupid game, and also won't care for the fish properly. Wow.

This! Everyone is saying oh rehome it etc but that absolutely won’t just be an end to it. I’d be repulsed that the man I married could be so cruel to a living creature all in the name of laddish bants, I’m not sure I could look at him the same way again.

Why thank goodness for the op? She's not said she's saved the fish yet.

Really shit, take it off him. And also on a side note sick of people thinking fish are like inanimate objects, they're not, they're lovely creatures.

I really hope this won’t be one of those threads where the OP disappears.

What an inane comment.

Well why not? Both the same animal except for a perception and I'm not vegan.

What an absolute cunt!

What a bunch of scum bags, the lot of them including your DH. Have you checked to see if the person you married has a back bone.. I would!

His sports team espouses cruelty to living creatures as a game and your husband goes along with it.

Fucking hell to the no.

I would go New York on those assholes and be naming and shaming on social media so they don't just get another fish to live in horrible conditions.

I've adopted abused animals and I have no truck with anyone who thinks this is ok, even for a fish.

Cruelty to animal extends to fish, if caught you can be banned from ever owning animals again and even tagged or put on house arrest for 6 months.

While most people get away with sheer ignorance causing fish to die with no repercussions because they are never caught by anyone with authority to prosecute, there have actually been cases of people charged and found guilty usually related to neglect from giving fish to children (its the adult charged if the neglecter was underage as you have to be over 16 to legally own or buy a pet/animal in the UK).

Obviously don't leave your husband over this. That would be crazy.

Re-homing the fish or keeping it yourself and then looking after it properly are good ideas. However, please be aware that they might just go and buy another fish, and then that will suffer.

I would take no issue with the rest of his group thinking that I am a "nag" or a "killjoy" and I would just complain to the organisers (if it's official) or on the WhatsApp group (if it's not formal) and tell them to stop. Yes, yes your husband is an adult who could do the latter. But if he doesn't I personally don't really care if the others don't like me. If he doesn't want to be embarrassed, he could say "having seen how the fish is kept, this isn't right and I want out".