Friend in a mood with me because of comment I made at dinner

[Mall03]

Out with friends last night - one has been travelling so I’ve not seen them for over a year. She asked me why I’m not on Instagram anymore; I replied I turned 30 years old and grew up - she laughed.

Another friend who was present (and uses IG) said my reply was rude and that I insinuated anyone over 30 who uses IG needs to grow up.

That’s not what I was saying (although I do find it all a bit cringe these days if I’m honest!).

Do you think my reply was inappropriate or did my friend over react?

I can see why she took it that way.

If you didn't mean Instagram is something people grow out of, what did you mean?

It was a deliberately provocative statement that provided a reaction. You basically called her an immature idiot either stand by it or apologise

It definitely comes across as rude and bitchy even if that wasn't the intention.

I mean yeah, your reply is quite insulting to anyone over 30 who does use Instagram. It was definitely a foot-in-mouth moment, assuming you didn’t realise the other friend still used it?

Yes, that was rude. ‘I’m not on IG’ would have sufficed.

I’m 40 and I’m on instagram. Am I not a grown up then op?

Well, you effectively told her you’re mature and she needs to grow up - what did you expect?

It gives the impression of superiority, you
may not have meant it that way, but I can see why they took offence.

Yes you were very rude. You sound like you wanted to come across as superior in some way. I hope you are not usually so insufferable

Heck. It was a bit rude.
Why is it cringe to use Instagram but not Mumsnet?

I’m 38 and on IG and wouldn’t have given two shits if you’d said this to me!

I’d find the comment mildly annoying but that’s it - it really isn’t as terribly rude as all that.

Isn’t instagram basically a photo sharing site?

I’m in my 60’s and look at a lot of garden photos, does that make me immature?

Come on, it was a dig and you know it otherwise you would have just said ‘no, I’m not on IG’

Don’t be one those people that makes smart arse digs and then gets all upset when you piss people off because of it.

I don’t use any social media apart from Facebook, it doesn’t make me special or interesting or cool.

Has your friend recently been to a cafe with a sign and left a review ?

This depends on your relationship. If you are the ‘banter’ type of friends then I’d say she was overreacting, if you’re not that type then yes, it was a bit of a stupid comment.

Pretty much!

She seems very sensitive, to an unreasonable degree

What a horribly judgemental thing to say. I find your comment and the fact you think you're above other people cringe.

I use IG for vegan recipes and martial arts training. I'm 47.

Did you feel insecure about something?

56 and on Instagram. With 3 different accounts.

Why would 30 be too old to use it?

This absolutely ^

And now you're being all disingenuous 🙄 and 'who, me?'

I'm on IG and I'm in my 60s. Love it and tiktok

🥳🥳🥳

Wouldn’t have bothered me at all. I didn’t find it provocative in the slightest. Quite funny to be honest and I’d have laughed

Ridiculous reason to be in a mood with you

You clearly hit a sore spot for her to overreact .

I do think the comment was rude but more so to the friend that had been travelling.

I'm assuming the travelling friend asked you because she had been putting her travelling pictures on Instagram? That friend is perhaps single and not settled in a career (travelling for a year)? I'm guessing you might be more settled down with partner/home/job so to say you came off Instagram because you grew up could then be pretty hurtful and make her feel like she is failing.

I think it's more likely you came off it because you were jealous seeing her travels.

All my assumptions could be completely wrong of course!