Team day out without me

[Ereerenownow]

Have just seen on social media that my entire team have been taken out as a treat by our manager. He has taken them to a local seaside resort for ice creams and general fun. I haven't been invited and didn't know anything about it. I'm the only one not there. We were all in the office yesterday and not a single person mentioned it.

Call ACAS!

I think you need to start compiling a list of these instances and go straight to HR and raise a bullying complaint. Not being invited on a team day out is bad enough (although ice cream at the beach with work colleagues sounds shit) but if colleagues are speaking to you like shit, lying about you and the manager is backing them, then it appears there is a bullying campaign going on.

Sounds like constructive dismissal, I’d try and get as much money as you can out of them and leave!

How unkind and nasty of them . Bastards should be held accountable for this. It is hurtful and most definitely bullying . Was it after work or on a day you were off? How did they organise it without you knowing ?

Are you PT or freelance?

This.
And although it is not work related………I am part of a charity support group and I never get asked to go for a coffee and was excluded from a visit to a knitted D Day display shown in a nearby town. Some people are just total shits!

Full time, seconded x

Yes, literally the only one x

Two and a half years x

I’d either go to HR and take it further

or

give them no reaction at all. Pretend I hadn’t noticed they’d gone. They probably want to hurt you and get a reaction so I wouldn’t give them it.

Most definitely bullying and that manager should be ashamed of himself. Wee shite, so unprofessional (sorry but that sort of thing pisses me off).

^ This, @Ereerenownow , and don't post anything on social media.

Nb. Double-check your work e-mails, just in case you have missed or accidentally deleted an e-mail - although this sounds unlikely.

Honestly, I would make a formal complaint. It’s clearly an ongoing problem and you are being isolated and excluded on purpose. If they are followed on social media then they will know you will see it which is even worse. It really is not nice when grown adults behave like this. I have had very similar but it was myself and another colleague left out and I work in a very small place of employment.. I just smiled and kept my thoughts to myself until one day I confided in a new manager who was horrified and changed the culture of the place! I couldn’t leave because of circumstances outside of work. If you can leave, do so. You deserve better because this stinks! Oh and screen shot everything on social media and any messages for future use.

God, this is absolutely disgusting OP. What a set of shits they all are. I don't know much about HR etc , but you are getting some good advice on here. Sounds like a pattern of behaviour towards you that they think is perfectly acceptable. It really isn't. Hope you're OK.

This is ostracisation and bullying by your manager and your colleagues. Deliberately leaving people out of team social events is bullying. You can take this further but I would also look for another job with nicer colleagues.

Check out the ACAS website for information about dealing with this:

www.acas.org.uk/bullying-at-work

Passive bullying, that’s what I’d call it OP. Maybe time to move on?

How are you defining the team? Do you all report directly to this same manager for example or are they people you work with a lot but technically aren’t in the same team?

I don't think I'm well liked in work

. do you have friends outside of work? How was school for you?

How do you know the manager paid for everything personally?

Screenshot all of the evidence, and keep a record and any evidence of any other times you are excluded. You may need it in future for an Employment Tribunal.

They’re at the seaside today
Saturday

so surely just friends all of whom are colleagues having a day at the beach

A group of colleagues at the beach on a sunny Saturday?

So you were working it wasn’t your day off?

Wha's that got to do with the unprofessional conduct of her manager and colleagues? Are you hoping to be able to tell OP that it's her own fault that she was excluded from this team social events.

@GoodonHamzah This is not helpful. OP is clearly having a tough time.