Wanting to look good and be a 10/10 girl? Men specifically?

[ThisChic]

People always criticise others for caring about their looks, but let's face it, we all appreciate beauty and strive to look our best.

I feel as though most women can be seen as '10/10' if they have good hygiene and skin/make up, i.e the whitened teeth, hair extensions, glowy fake tan, slim and big breasts.

I feel like I have a few obvious flaws; small boobs is the main one, but also teeth and hair that could be 'glowed up'.

I see that 95% of the women on TikTok on Instagram with 100 - 500k followers are just slim, tanned women with big boobs. All different facial features, but heavily made up, thin and big boobs.

Am I being unreasonable to want to make myself look hotter by fixing my flaws?

I would make any decision for surgery for myself anyway, but I just wonder what peoples' thoughts are!

If a man preferred you to have a boob job then he's obviously not the right man for you because the right man would love you the way you are.

But all these comments are falling on deaf ears as you are adamant you're right so go and get your boob job and see how many nice men fall at your feet.

Love this post. So much genuine wisdom in it. Be the best version of yourself you want to be, but do it only for yourself, not for anyone else’s perception of you. Especially not a man because there’ll always be someone hotter coming up behind you and ultimately you can’t compete with the march of time - so invest in things that really last - like your mind 🙂

Nothing wrong with wanting to be beautiful but keep it natural. Whitened and perfect teeth to me look unnatural and not real. Some men adore small boobies and I knew one that actually genuinely preferred them. Colour your hair by all means but it will look best in a shade closer to your natural shade, and will also be lower maintenance. Don’t go for an artificial, too perfect image, it’ll cost you time and money to maintain.

I really can’t believe this thread has gone on so long, you need to start with inner work. You don’t feel sexy as you are cos you’ve bought into a lot of superficial marketed fluff. If you do get breast implants and they do make you suddenly feel better it’ll be like Dumno and his bloody feather! (That was an analogy I didn’t think I’d ever be making!)

Also real sexual/romantic chemistry is quite a rarified thing, no matter how good looking you are or aren’t. It requires a little something extra and magical that whilst tough to define speaks to a unique combination of factors that’s unique to two people. Newsflash how big your tits are or for us guys how tall/wealthy we may be.

Your block isn’t your boobs it’s how in your head you are about all of this. You may not even NOTICE a compatible male hitting on you, because you have made it your lived reality that no man could possibly desire you.

I’ll say it again we men are attracted to you women as WHOLE beings not sodding body parts. Okay seeing as we have this ridiculous 10/10 scale, let’s expand it a woman (or indeed a man) can be on a whole multitude of scales looks, intelligence, wit, charm, ambition, confidence. You name it. A man who is ONLY fixated on looks is liable to end up with a real booby prize. Pun intended…

You’ve ignored the majority of my comment. Interesting. I rather thought you would.

And the fact that you’re completely disregarding that the majority of the women on that list (provided by the men themselves) don’t fit your description of the ideal is fascinating. Celebs with big boobs exist. These men are aware of said celebs. In the main, that’s not who they picked.

Hundreds of thousands of men: we fancy Sophie Turner and Natalie Dormer the most. They are the hottest women on earth.

You: no. Men like big boobs.

I've not read much of this thread , some of your posts and your replies to comments I made and some of the contributions from other posters. And I actually looked up the story of the poor poor orangutan that one poster mentioned. Gosh I wish I hadn't done that.
But OP you have managed to really really depress me.
I really don't want to live in the type of world you seem to think is normal.

But I still can't shake the idea that lots of men would prefer someone like Sophie Turner or Keira if they had larger breasts.

Just off the top.of my head - Michael Fassbender is a handsome, successful, wealthy, apparently hung (!), famous actor who could have his pick of Californian (and international).natural and not natural big boobed women. Instead he married Alicia Vikander.
He could have chosen anyone else.

He is like many many men who could have their pick of women - beautiful/pretty and big boobs; but they don't pick that in their life partner.
They have the choice - they choose small/medium boobed beautiful women.

Thinking of action stars - Dwayne Johnston, John Cena, Jason Statham - again they have their pick of natural and not so natural big boobed beautiful women ....and they're all married to or in LTRs with not big boobed beautiful women.

You will perhaps argue they fell in love and settled for that, but would prefer the same women with bigger boobs. But in my experience men wouldn't even date those women in the first place, or at the very least get into serious relationships with them, if their bodies weren't acceptable/irrelevant to them. They are utterly spoiled for choice. They don't need to date women whose bodies and figures are not ideal to them ...in order to fall in love in the first place.

I've given you examples of very wealthy, powerful men who could have their pick and again chose non big boobed women.
I could keep in finding examples.

What's your explanation of that?

You remind me of an incel in terms of your black and white, stunted understanding of things that are varied, complex/subtle.

There’s Pierce Brosnan too - his wife is not a slim, 10/10 insta-model, and he not only adores her, he fights her corner when people make nasty remarks!

And Tom Holland. Could probably have his pick of most of the women on the planet. Yet he's engaged to Zendaya. Who has small boobs. Perfectly in proportion to her body though.

Whitened and perfect teeth to me look unnatural and not real.

Turkey teeth!

I have natural 36 DD breasts. My DH does like them. I'm quite petite as well. So surely we are finding partners who like us just as we are. Not changing ourselves.

Exactly.

@PlasticPassion No trying to be argumentative, I just replied to people and got into discussions because I did mislead people with my post and in some of my replies.

I started this thread on a whim because I was feeling fed up with my body and insecure, and the surgery I’d planned for this year has had to be postponed to next year now (due to moving house, finances).

I should really have (1) phrased the OP much better and (2) posted in a different section maybe.

Then keeping your breasts as they are means you’ll filter out all of the dickheads.

Do you not see that that undergoing surgery jsut so men can make unsolicited, unpleasant comments… that somehow makes you feel better about yourself because in your head that unpleasantness = evidence of desirability, is actually pretty fucked up?

Haha no I don’t want ‘Turkey’ teeth 😅 Those are the botch jobs.

Was a small b for years as a teenager and had no shortage of male attention. Men don’t give a toss. Some men actively prefer small boobs. I think you are so focused on boobs it’s ridiculous. I have no ass to speak of but I would never get any work done. If a man doesn’t like it that’s their problem not mine.

Yes it would be fucked up if I wanted the idiots’ attention, but I don’t. I want the attention/attraction of other nice men who probably do also like/prefer the larger breasts, but they just wouldn’t act like a letch about it.

She was very slim when they met but has gained weight with age, as has he.

Ageing happens to us all… I’m not really scared of it. Just trying to look great while I’m young, right now.

@ThisChic you really don’t see what everyone is telling you and that this is a mental health issue for which you need therapy.

Don’t you think it would be sensible to have some counselling before making the decision to pay for and go through unnecessary surgery? It could be life changing for you. It could really help you reframe your self worth and see yourself as worthy of love and attraction just as you are.

If you had a daughter would you like them to have some counselling before such a crucial decision or would you encourage them to go ahead without any?

@StrawberryDream24 Your post does me a momentary confidence boost….

To be honest I just have this belief I struggle to shake off that bigger breasts are absolutely a ‘must have’ feature and all men want them and when a woman lacks them, well he must be ´settling’…. It’s a belief and feeling I’ve had for years and it won’t subside overnight, even if I can see the evidence people present me.

I’ve actually been told by Incels online how terrible small breasts are in the past…they idolise porn stars with basket ball sized breasts, and claim that any man who says he doesn’t like big ones is ‘closeted gay or pedophile’. And I know these Incels are weirdos… it’s just they claim to tell ‘the truth’ that other men are ´too PC to say’ 🙄

But in short, thank you!

Different posters have made different and unrelated points. I haven’t fundamentally disagreed with most of them.

@StrawberryDream24 Quite a few of them are intimidated by very beautiful women.

^ I’ve heard that point before. I guess it boils down to what we class as ‘very beautiful’ as well…. I’d started this post about Tiktok/Instagram models but apparently not everyone thinks this is the epitome of beauty.

I think men who believe they’re attractive will try their luck with women they find beautiful. On the flip side, a good looking but less confident guy might not.

One of the main problems with surgery for people with body dysmorphic disorder is that most of the time they are dissatisfied with the results or the relief they feel is short lived. They often deeply regret surgery and feel they have disfigured themselves which often leads to more surgery in an attempt to “correct” the new problem/s. Even if they’re satisfied with the results, they often then switch their focus to a different part of their body.
You should get assessed for BDD before you consider surgery. There is a technique called Socratic questioning that is a part of CBT that helps you to challenge those kinds of unhealthy, embedded beliefs. Exposure and response prevention therapy is very effective in treating BDD too.

No