DP refuses to acknowledge my birthday on social media

[BrightLJ]

It was my birthday yesterday - me and my DP officially got together around this time last year so this was the first birthday he was properly ‘with’ me for for.

He made the day really special, thoughtful presents, a nice day out with a lunch somewhere I have always wanted to go to.

For DP’s birthday a few months ago I did a big post on my insta grid, with photos of us and a loving caption.

I thought DP would have done the same for
me yesterday. It got to early evening and I still
hadn’t been tagged by him or noticed anything on his profile so I asked him if he was planning on doing this.

He said no, that he has wished me happy birthday in person and that he didn’t see the point in posting something publicly when he’d spent all day with me. I said it would mean a lot to me if he did but he again said no and that he isn’t really a social media type of person and always felt these sort of posts were unnecessary unless the two people were apart.

I was admittedly a bit frosty with him after this and the evening didn’t really go as planned, he was meant to stay over at mine but said he wasn’t feeling great and went home.

I’ve messaged him today to say I was a bit hurt by him not posting and that it felt as though he wasn’t proud of us. He’s basically replied to say again he’s not that type of man and it isn’t something he will ever do.

Am I unreasonable to ask for this, it’s a minimum expectation in this day and age surely?

If true, you are pathetic.

I fear that this will be like talking to a brick wall, but really, OP, when you look back in the future at what your priorities are/were, you'll laugh at yourself. 40 something year old me would look at 20 something year old me and tell me to give my head a wobble. Social media posts mean nothing - literally nothing. He's agreed to do it in future - not because he wants to, but because you're manipulating him into it. He gave you a really lovely, well thought out birthday, but now has been made to feel guilty over something so inconsequential it's ridiculous. And your friends asking if everything is ok is just feeding into that. If you genuinely like this man, accept him for who he is and don't base your worth or his worth over some platitudes spouted out on social media. It's the equivalent of being a digital peacock - and yet no-one really is impressed and everyone but you will forget or not care within 30 seconds. I get that you care, and I'm genuinely sorry that you're upset about it, but you also need to understand that people are just different. Appreciate him for who he is, as he clearly seems to appreciate you - he just shows it in a different way.

I can't believe this is a real post from an adult. Don't be ridiculous!

Jeez. Are you 13? This is absolutely fucking bonkers!

If you don't like it, don't put such stock in it. You are allowed independent thought.....

⬆️ this. I’d dump you. You’re being ridiculous.

Arrrggghhhhhh!!!!!!

Doesn't anybody realise how Serious This Is??!!

OP's birthday hasn't been acknowledged on Social Media!
By her DP!!!!!!
She will start to stop existing if her Special Date hasn't been stuck on Insta or FB or thingy of choice, like in "Back to the Future" where Marty's family start fading from the photograph.

@BrightLJ : Important!
Are you disappearing?

I don’t think I’ve ever read anything so pathetic since my daughters Year 9 whatsapp group,

Has anybody other than me reported this utter bollocks? It can't be real, surely?

Awaits deletion for troll hunting, whilst the trip trapping echoes all around us.

If you really are real, OP, you need help - and he deserves better.

You sound insufferable

Maybe he’s grown up since then?

it sounds like you have a lot of shit stirrers around you.

just concentrate on your actual relationship, not the public picture of one. I personally find it pathetic when people post endlessly showing off their partners. I did it when I was younger a bit and then decided I didn’t like the pressure. I hardly ever post about current partner but he is the one I am having a child with and settling down with. I trust and respect the relationship enough to not give a shit what it looks like on social media. (I am 40).

I have to say I feel sorry for your generation.

This.

plus - ‘standards we must demand from our men’ - You’ve been reading too many weird influencers

Nothing more cringe than a big over the top social media post when you’re spending the whole day with the person in real life .

There's a saying you'd do well to remember, OP:
The sign of a healthy relationship, is no sign of it on Facebook
Think yourself lucky that you have a guy who shows up in real life - and doesn't just show off on social media!

I thought this too, future posts will have no real meaning to the OP. It's just because of her sulking.

I've got a couple both on my social media, he rarely posts, maybe once every couple of years. The woman is always posting. It was the woman's birthday a few days ago and he posted, but you can clearly tell it was her because of how the wording was. I thought it was weird.

This 👌

This cannot be real surely? Are you trolling? As a late 20s individual myself I am embarrassed for my generation. You are more fussed about how other people perceive your relationship and have essentially thrown away a beautiful day spent with your partner. On top of that, you have then proceeded to go and guilty trip him into apologising to you.

What is the point in posting here if you’re not going to even consider another opinion other than your own? The majority are telling you this is utterly ridiculous. You’ve clearly made up your mind already and refuse to see your partner’s point of view. It is a very sad world we live in where people prioritise how they are perceived on a social media platform rather than enjoying their real life.

Oh for goodness sake. Could you be any more ungrateful for effort he put in? Way to become single really fast! Have you considered a social media break OP?

OP, you're talking like everyone on this thread is ancient.

I'm late 20s and I still think it's mad you're feeling unloved because he didn't post something on social media, when he spent the whole day spoiling you in person.

I can't wrap my head round it at all.

Well if you're still together on your next birthday don't expect him to do anything except wish you happy birthday on social media.
Honestly you sound about 10. He made a fuss of you all day and then you threw a strop because he didn't make a fuss of you on Insta.

Why does he put up with this?

My friends husband had a big birthday this week. She bought him lovely presents, a lovely card, an amazing cake and is taking him away for a few days.

She didn't post a thing on SM. she said everything she wanted to direct & enjoyed spending the day with him. That's what grown ups do

This totally, people living fake lives needing to post on social media to impress people they don't even like.
Nobody cares about social media posts, your boyfriend sounds lovely, he is obviously a private person who doesn't feel the need to impress others. You have a choice keep your nice kind boyfriend and live in the real world or find someone else who shares your passion for sharing the details of your life with random strangers!

So, it's case of 'if there isn't a post about it, it mustn't be real'? 🙄
Like the people who obviously haven't eaten if they don't post a picture of their food.

How sad for your partner.

Sounds like he’s reconsidering the relationship and good on him. You sound incredibly shallow and vain. He sounds at the end of his tether and I’m not surprised, frankly.