Boys going to the gents by themselves what age?

[Khgvnjj]

Ds is turning 7 and increasingly wants to go to the public toilets by himself. I grew up in a household of only women so no experience of this. When sis your boys start going to the gents by themselves? Did you put any caveats in place?

8, with me hovering outside.

Depends where it is. Busy loos in sainsburys - 7.

Somewhere unknown/on holiday etc older.

Secondary school generally but later stages of primary school age year six they will probably be confident enough.

I think my eldest went around 8 years old (may have been a bit younger) and I would hover outside the door. Youngest went much younger (he wanted to) but would always go either way his brother/s

Probably the same here 8/9- even now (youngest ten) I worry with them in the toilets for too long. It’s so difficult

8 is the age that boys stop going into women’s changing rooms at the swimming pool (etc), so wanting to start trying the gents at 7 seems correct to me.
We started off with less busy gents, going in with his dad or with me waiting outside, only using cubicles. And specifically explained not to strike up conversation at urinals!

So he already goes to the gents with his dad and in the pool. However, this is when he is with me and whether it should be ok for him to go by himself.

I'd be very surprised if they were still coming into the ladies after 8. I think that's the general rule for changing rooms at swimming pools so it seems a reasonable age to also independently go to into the men's toilets.

DS was about 6 but we lived overseas in a country where they’re much stricter about same sex toilets/ changing rooms. My rules were don’t speak to anyone. If they speak to you just say “I’m not allowed to speak to strangers” and if they persist just walk straight out. I always waited outside and we tended to choose “busier” loos.

Around 7/8 I think but it depended on the situation. I was very uncomfortable letting him go to the gents in our local park for example. He would go behind a tree instead usually! Whilst if we were in his karate club that was fine - tons of other kids there and all the adults were DBS checked.

Around 7/8 ish but hover around outside. It depends on the location though. I'm thinking in reverse when dh takes dd out if im working. She's 8. Sometimes she uses the ladies with him outside and sometimes he takes her into the gents ..it depends on the situation.

So I went to the ladies by myself when I was 7 but I guess no one thought there would be any danger, more a question of managing toileting by myself.

This is a divisive topic on MN. You'll get people saying it's dangerous to send boys in alone until they're like 14, and other people saying they should be barred from the women's loos as soon as they can walk.

You know your child so you're the best judge. FWIW I think most 7-8yos can cope with going in on their own.

Location dependent, 7ish in restaurants and places like that, nearer 10 in places like train stations, airports etc.

My DS is 8 and I’m starting to send him in the gents alone in busy places. Park toilets, bus or train stations etc which are quiet and I can’t tell if there will be drug users or male prostitutes inside then he has to come in with me (I live in an area where that is sadly a frequent occurrence).

When my son used the gents on his own, I used to call out to him from the door and ask him if anyone else was in there. He used to say yes or no. That way, anybody else inside knew he was being supervised.

Around 7/8, with me hovering outside the door. You have to cut the apron strings sometime and DS preferred it because it was usually much quicker in busy places than queuing for the ladies with me!

7-8 here. The busier the place, The closer I would stand to the entrance (and make myself known with a call through the door if he was taking a little too long).

Ask his dad if there's any toilets to avoid (cleanliness, people hanging around etc) and then use your common sense.

Plus if the situation does mean you ate using the ladies for a few more years, supervise hi. To make sure there's no silliness that might make similarly age girls uncomfortable

My son is 6.5 and likes to go to the men’s loos now. I allow it in smaller places or safer places and I wait outside but I wouldn’t let him in a large or busy place just yet

I used the pool changing room rule of 8. I gradually got DS used to it from 7.

I got told on another thread a while ago that it's unacceptable for boys (boys as in male children) to be in the female toilets because a lady may feel uncomfortable.
Sorry to say but I care more about my son's safety than someone feeling "uncomfortable" some of these zealots seem to have no idea of the things that could happen if a child was sent into the men's toilet alone.

@Scrubberdubber same here. ds not getting raped is my priority. (Although "safe" loos ive been letting him use since age 6, so our health club, kid friendly restaurants etx, altho i will always keep thr door open with my arm and shout it)

Mine was really young as he was insistent and wouldn’t go to the ladies. It was fine.

People taking boys over 6 or 7 into the ladies toilet is weird and inappropriate.

There's absolutely no way I'm letting my six year old go in a busy gents by himself. He's only just started going in the cubicle in the ladies by himself and then standing outside while I go (because I've only just started trusting him not to wander off).

We'll work from there and he'll go in the gents around 8 I guess, depending on how sensible he is by then.