To want to go in my garden without my neighbours being intrusive

[RandomMess]

As soon as the neighbours spot either of us put in either our front or back garden they mysteriously need to come outside for a wander and then just have to interrupt us.

I get their world is small but I just want to be left alone to do what I need to.

It is ruining any enjoyment I could potentially have if I ever actually got to use my garden instead of avoiding being out there at all.

I need to tidy up after the high winds. Managed to be out for 10 minutes max before they appeared so I've come in for a cuppa.

“Let me tell you all about Our Lord Jesus” and chat for ages with a cheery smile and no eye contact.

never fails.

Start gardening nude.

A taller fence? Screening?

Headphones on

Nope it really wouldn't.

DH was hanging out the washing in the summer and the man whizzed out to interrogate him on his compression stocking he was wearing.

We are clearly watched all the time...

😭

Headphones. You don't even have to be listening to anything. But you can pretend not to notice your neighbours when you aren't looking at them, and if you look up at catch their eye, you just shout "listening to a book, it's great!" (you have to shout so they think you're talking over the voice in your ears).

Then just carry on doing what you're doing.

I only chat in the front garden. Back garage is private space. Can you plant anything or raise the fence?

Just say 'sorry can't stop and chat need to get this done' and carry on. They'll get the message.

A hedge will do the trick

My house is like that. It's the men who are the biggest problem - I swear they stand there waiting for someone to appear.

Do they chat for long or just want to exchange a few words and will then leave you alone?

I second headphones, preferably the big obvious ones.

Can't do headphones when we are out together trying to fix stuff/prune trees etc FML

Can't have fences without getting major work done - very complicated to explain. Plus digging up a heap of very thick concrete.

When our roof is replaced in the summer I hope it pisses them off 🤬

I would build a taller fence or wear headphones

Any way you can put more taller fencing/bushes in? But yes, failing that, headphones and pretend you can’t hear.

It's always an interrogation.

They complain about anything and everything so we're always on edge about what they are going to say.

I got commentary on running my car engine to use the tyre air compressor. Fuck Off.

Have you ever told them you don't have time to talk or are in a rush?

You don't have to stand there and listen, go about your tasks and say vague 'mm.' 'ok.' even better if it makes no sense as a reply to their drivel.

You're going to have to go hard core OP. If they try to engage, just don't answer. I know it's counter instinctive but you'll have to bite the bullet. If that really doesn't work then you'll simply have to tell them firmly that you find them intrusive and wish to be left alone - or however you want to phrase it. I've been in a similar position and that's what I did. Are they elderly? Do they have the capacity to turn the whole neighbourhood against you?

You are fabulous I love this!

This would really annoy me, I’d be tempted to play very loud porn in the garden and tell them to stop spying on you having sex, I think they’ll be too embarrassed to bother you again. Jokes aside, plant some hedges or trees, even fake plants in pots just to make it difficult for them to see you. Bamboo screening is also good for this.

Why can’t you do big headphones but have nothing playing- they don’t need to know there is nothing playing

"I'm so glad you're here.
Can you come and have a look at the dog?
I think he he's got rabies."

If you can't have fences, you need to look into some kind of plant barrier.

Also, if they're always complaining then your relationship can't be that good anyway? In which case, it doesn't matter if you offend them by telling them you don't have time to speak to them.

I'd do a Larry David and be blunt/honest. I'd tell them that m extremely private and feeling a bit suffocated because of this obligation to have to chat more frequently than is comfortable and that in the back garden you need to be left alone. No room for misunderstanding. I've done similar a fair few times in my life....it has worked. Best of luck op

I could understand your problem if they are sweet people and you don't want to offend, but given they aren't very nice. I'd ignore or engage at such a low level they wouldn't bother. Failing that I'd be really blunt and say I haven't got time to talk.

My sister had this with her neighbour, she put up a huge fence.