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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Comment on Facebook by Office Manager

272 replies

ByOliveWriter · 27/12/2024 18:51

I was in a job a few years ago and there was an issue with the heating. It gets really hot in the office, 26 degrees in winter which is really drying and I was going home with head aches. Raised this with managers who didn't do anything and than health and safety guy. I should be this ill from working in an office.

He said he would follow it up and agreed it was hot. The operations manager contacted the office manager to see how the temp was in the office - to which it was said I was wearing a coat (there are two people with the same name in the office but she shortens her name). The director of HR was CC and anyway I got a job with a £5k pay increase a few weeks later as it got way out of hand.

Anyway I was surfing Facebook and the office manager has made a comment about it on her facebook and tagged my manager and the person who sits next to me. The comment was brief along the lines of "what do I have to deal with".

Aibu in thinking that's not right?

OP posts:
HollyKnight · 27/12/2024 20:19

Won't someone think of the poor Director of HR who got copied in on this 6-way conversation about the woman in the coat complaining about the heat.

NameChanger407 · 27/12/2024 20:19

This is such a bizarre thread.... I love it 😅

I dont understand why the OP is getting so angry 😅

HornyHornersPinger · 27/12/2024 20:19

She probably did it for your benefit knowing you're the type of person to look on people's Facebook.
I post things on my Facebook and put them as public for effect. For example, when my noisy nutty neighbour moved I publicly posted "Thank God that psycho bitch moved".
Given that you've seen this year's down the line and it's bugging you, I'd say the manager has you down to a tee.

lollylawyer · 27/12/2024 20:21

How do you know the comment was about you and your temperature complaint

wordler · 27/12/2024 20:21

So is this right?

There was one particular day in the office where your complaints about the temp blew up. You’d already lodged a complaint - operations manager has rung/emailed to check on the temp that day. Someone (?) office manager had replied saying you were wearing a coat so couldn’t be too hot but they’d got the wrong person.

I assume you then got involved in this email chain to say it wasn’t you wearing the coat and you were still too hot. HR had been CC’d in so it became a big issue to sort out between - you, office manager, operations manager, health and safety guy and HR.

It must have been a significant issue that day for you to remember the particular day after a couple of years.

Now you have seen a FB post from that day which you are assuming is about you and the temp incident? Especially because they tagged the colleague who sat next to you in that office. Is there anything in the post apart from a WTF and an eye roll?

Anything mentioning you? Anything mentioning office temps?

Why do you think your colleague said they needed a day to catch up - was your response to the temp issue interfering with her ability to concentrate?

VivX · 27/12/2024 20:21

Not the point of the thread, but:
OP said that this was "a few years ago" - how does everyone know it was specifically "three years ago"?

Butchyrestingface · 27/12/2024 20:21

I tried to change my username to ButchyGatekeepingFace but a message says I must keep to the same username throughout the thread. I did not know this.

Woe. Woe. Thrice woe. 😭

2468KMNP · 27/12/2024 20:21

Well @ByOliveWriter you could be you by the time heat show gang. Or on the hand of two, it could say higher.

Scandicc · 27/12/2024 20:22

@ByOliveWriter I just switched off the heating in my house in your honour. Please come back and reply to some comments.

HagTime · 27/12/2024 20:22

@EmotionalSupportBiscuit I'm 8 shots down 🥴

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 27/12/2024 20:23

Butchyrestingface · 27/12/2024 20:21

I tried to change my username to ButchyGatekeepingFace but a message says I must keep to the same username throughout the thread. I did not know this.

Woe. Woe. Thrice woe. 😭

It's a new thing they brought in a few months ago

PumpkinSoup21 · 27/12/2024 20:23
Cary Elwes Disney Plus GIF by Disney+

Gatekeeping.
All jokes aside it means keeping to yourself some knowledge or information that could benefit others. Or controlling access to something. It doesn’t mean criticising or disagreeing. It’s also distinct from censoring. Gatekeeping in this circumstance would be not allowing you access to Mumsnet or keeping from you the information that Mumsnet exists.

blueshoes · 27/12/2024 20:23

I have a bit of sympathy for the office manager now that I have an inkling what she had has to deal with.

Trumpett · 27/12/2024 20:23

If your name wasn’t mentioned or no specific details about what had happened, it’s probably best to not jump to any conclusions that the comment was about you.
I’m an ops manager and there’s not a day that goes by that there isn’t at least 3 dramas at work, most FAR worse than an issue over the temperature of the office, honestly I think you’re probably reading too much in to it.
It is unprofessional for a manager to make negative comments about work on social media, but as my kids would say to me - it’s not that deep.

Glittertwins · 27/12/2024 20:24

@EmotionalSupportBiscuit - I was just thinking about @HagTime and how many drinks she'd had in that short amount of time!

Manxexile · 27/12/2024 20:24

fridaynight1 · 27/12/2024 20:12

This is all very confusing. Why where you wearing a coat if you were too hot?

No - you've got it all wrong - but not surprising given the communications skills of the OP...

The person wearing the coat was someone else (who had the same name as the OP but shortened - or perhaps shortens - her name) and the OP's manager thought the person wearing the coat - who hadn't complained it was too hot - was the OP, who had complained it was too hot.

All this might have happened 3 years ago or yesterday...

ttcat37 · 27/12/2024 20:25

I don’t understand what relevance the comment made has to you in any way other than it was between two people you used to work with? Seems like you’re clutching at straws.

I wish the most I had to worry about was the idea that someone I used to work with years ago might have said something about me on Facebook

Missmarplesknittingbuddy · 27/12/2024 20:26

OP, I would scroll to the Facebook page of the day you actually left . I suspect you will see bunting ! .

Bloom15 · 27/12/2024 20:26

Scandicc · 27/12/2024 20:09

Can recommend posting a status along the lines of “Omg surrounded by snakes 🐍” and then when someone asks you who you mean, you can reply with “DM me hun”.
Will be as much use as this entire thread.

Edited

😂😂

Well, 'surrounded by snakes 3 years ago, who came to a baptism'

Seriously - who cares. I am very laidback but I can't believe OP actually cares about something so pointless and trivial

Ginnnny · 27/12/2024 20:26

Your post is confusing, OP.
I see you’re getting quite defensive with others in your replies, but I have to say I’m inclined to agree with the majority of them.
this issue was a few years ago, I understand it’s still got time and space in your head so still an issue to you, but I think you need to let it go.
you have a new, better paid job now and those people before probably weren’t your friends.

EmotionalSupportBiscuit · 27/12/2024 20:26

2468KMNP · 27/12/2024 20:21

Well @ByOliveWriter you could be you by the time heat show gang. Or on the hand of two, it could say higher.

You took the words right out of my mouth.

Ohwhydidntijustkeepmymouthshut · 27/12/2024 20:27

EmotionalSupportBiscuit · 27/12/2024 20:18

You need to keep better diary records à la OP because the fabled Penis Beaker was (prepare to feel old) 2013!

Show quote history

No way! I must have seen it reposted somewhere then 🫣. Il admit I don’t like the people I work with enough to go through 3 years of posts to see if they inferred to something I did one day at work.

GetyourheadoutoftheovenIris · 27/12/2024 20:27

What is your new better paid role?

Is it a…… gate keeper? (Sorry @HagTime).

I would get my coat but it’s bloody boiling in here.

Trumpett · 27/12/2024 20:27

PumpkinSoup21 · 27/12/2024 20:23

Gatekeeping.
All jokes aside it means keeping to yourself some knowledge or information that could benefit others. Or controlling access to something. It doesn’t mean criticising or disagreeing. It’s also distinct from censoring. Gatekeeping in this circumstance would be not allowing you access to Mumsnet or keeping from you the information that Mumsnet exists.

Thanks for this, I wanted to comment similar but I was too scared of OP’s reaction 🫣

getthosetitsup · 27/12/2024 20:27

HagTime · 27/12/2024 19:39

I'm going to drink a shot every time this OP says gatekeeping.

Steady on, I'm not sure I can order you a new liver on Amazon Prime.

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