Angry at comment

[Hertsgirl1234]

My husband was on a world do last night with about 8 men and his secretary who is an old acquaintance we have known for years.
my children who are 12 called him at 11.30pm to speak to him. He was so drunk that when he put the phone down he left it up by mistake.

They heard his secretary (friend) say “why don’t you tell them you are out on a work do and you won’t be home til the morning”

They came down to tell me. I am annoyed that she is suggesting he tells his own daughters that, what has it got to do with her what he says to our children? What woman makes snide comments like that?

i am annoyed she has overstepped the mark? Does she think she is some sort of lad? Your thoughts?

I’d be pissed too. Why is she suggesting he wouldn’t be back until the morning?

I think she asked him a perfectly reasonable question. Why didn’t he tell them? And woukd you be so outraged if a man had asked?

how old are the girls? Seems odd to let them call their dad when you know he’s going to be drunk.

Why are you letting your kids call him at 11.30 when out drinking on a work do?

Were you expecting him home?
Assume you knew he'd be drinking
Why weren't the kids in bed at 1130 on a school night?

I don't see it as an unreasonable question. He's out enjoy himself, why can't he tell the kids that if they're calling him at nearly midnight. Seems like a pretty sensible response to be honest.

Although why your kids are up calling him at that time in the first place would be what I was more concerned about, not her perfectly reasonable question.

Are you sure he was on a work do? Sounds like she was telling him to say that and he might have not been at the do but elsewhere. That was my first thought on the comment

Why on earth would a 12 year old need to ring their father at midnight to speak to him when he was on a work do?

His secretary was probably suggesting that he said, I am on a work do and won't be home any time soon so go to bed and I will see you in the morning.

You are being ridiculous.

I thought at first that she was hinting that he might be spending the night with her. Or if not, that DC shouldn't be bothering him when he's out with his workmates.
If the latter, I can't see that it matters. More importantly, why were two twelve year olds up at 11:30 and phoning their dad who is out drinking? Did you allow this?

Why were they calling him when he was out with his colleagues?

This. That's really odd.

Why would you think he wasn't at a work do...

She was clearly telling him to remind his kids that he was out and wouldn't be back until tomorrow so they stopped blooming calling him at almost midnight and interrupting his night out.

The fact anyone thinks he was having some sort of illicit affair is bonkers.

I’m surprised that two 12 year olds are up at 11.30 and calling their dad on a work night out for a chat! Why on earth would they need to do that? Let the man have some peace!

Honestly if DH was out for the night I wouldn’t let DD call him and disturb his night out.

Eh? If they rang him they would have disconnected the call surely? And why were they ringing him? And what was wrong with what the woman said?

My brain hurts

Why are 12 yr olds calling him on his work night out at 1130pm?

YABU

Why on earth were your kids ringing someone on a work night out at 11.30?! Clearly his work colleague thinks that’s as bizarre as most of the posters on here do,

I'd be peeved if dh let the kids ring me on a night out, why would any parent want to talk to their child when drunk. Whilst her comment was a little snippy I can see why she's surprised they rang.

Can't see how it was snide. Why weren't the kids in bed?

Did you not tell your 12yr olds that they will not be calling their father as there's no need, he's out, and they should go to sleep?

Why are 12 year olds up at 11.30pm and phoning their dad out on a works do? This is so strange.

Things that never happened #5444

"I'm at a work do and will be home by the morning/when you wake up" is along the lines of what I'd say to a child who rang me at 11:30pm while I was out. I don't see what's wrong with it?

She probably thought "poor kids he can't speak to them whilst he is drunk"

You're blaming the wrong person here OP. The secretary wasn't at fault and nothing she said was snide. Your kids shouldn't be phoning anyone at 11:30pm. They should have been in bed on a school night. Your DH should be upfront with you about where he is and for how long. But none of this is the secretary's fault.

You're massively overreacting to a non-issue here. And why on earth were you letting your kids phone your drunk husband on his work night out at 11.30 at night anyway? You're the one in the wrong here.