Would you expect adult stepson to help with household chores if he worked and you didn't?

[orangejuice11]

I am currently a sahp to mine and dh children and his adult son also lives here.
I do the housework and all the childcare but SS is home 3 days a week as he works compressed hours.
He doesn't feel he should do any chores as he works and I don't.
Dh works away a lot and I don't want to burden him with this but curious to see if others would expect an adult child to help out around the house in this situation?

I’m not sure what your point is. Either you clean it fully after every use, or it will need a bigger clean after a period of time. The OP’s son is being asked to do that bigger clean. It will inevitably involve some soap scrubbing because that’s the nature of the job.

You're not his servant. He's a fully functioning adult. Of course he should do something

When you say clean the bathroom, do you mean scrub the bath, scrub the toilet, mop the floor, clean the mirror…? What sort of a state is the bathroom generally in, and how long do you imagine the job would take him? If it’s something he’s never done before, and if it’s something he’s not seen his dad do before, the task might sound like a big job to him, when in fact it might be something which takes 20 mins max. If you have a good relationship with him, it might be worth softening it, and saying look I know you aren’t happy about me asking you to do this, but can I just talk you through/show you what I’m asking you to do? You might really help him with skills for the future!

Also, as an aside, I laughed when I saw someone had written “if you clean the bathroom every day and you’re asking him to clean it once a week so that you can have one day off a week, can you just clean it six times a week and not clean it on the seventh?”. It was news to me that some people clean their bathrooms every single day!

Of course he helps. Lazy and entitled little so and so. Please please help his future partner by teaching him housework is not women’s work, you are home to care for children not clean up after his lazy arse.

This all seems a bit pointless until the OP comes back and clarifies things. It's been 2 days.

I read it that the bathroom is cleaned a few times a week like most people do not that it's the only clean....he's capable of soap scrubbing and if he's been taught to clean a bath after himself it's not an issue.

It’s not his baths that I’m talking about though, it’s the two young children’s. Please read.

If the bath is cleaned after a bath then he's not cleaning the scum he's cleaning the bathroom in general no different to cleaning the kitchen it's a communal area

He needs to contribute to chores .... or he can pay you to do his share.