There's absolutely nothing wrong with iPad at the table at a restaurant after a child centric day

[moomoomouseey]

Imagine a day, filled with child friendly activities on holiday. Think beach, biking sandcastles, swimming together, pool, diving, playgrounds, reading books together, drawing, child centred show in the evening, fun fair, trampoline jumping.. etc etc..

At the end of all this, you go out for a meal. You bring crayons and paper etc and other toys, but after a while, your children are restless and bored but you want to enjoy your meal. You get out the iPads with headphones and let your kids watch for a bit/ play educational games, while you enjoy your meal in peace.

Some judgy judgerpants walks past and thinks you're a bad parent.

Kids are 2 and 4 or 3 and 5.

Did they say anything?

You are not being unreasonable

A stranger actually commented on this? Ignore and move on with your life, they obviously don't have much going on in theirs!

Well it never happened when I was a child (70s baby) and my DC were never allowed to either (10s babies).

I personally don't like to see it. We didn't have ipads growing up and we all learned to sit at the table and behave. I also hate seeing adults sitting at the table on their phones rather than conversing with the people they're with.

Things can be too child-centric. A whole day of fun activities finished off with an ipad is all for the child. It's okay for them to be bored for a while.

Is this your way of saying OP is a bad parent?

I wouldn't let my child do it, but I'd not be bothered by you having it for yours, as long as there was no volume.

I agree that doing this doesn’t make you a bad parent. We all do what we need to to have happy, manageable days. I don’t judge parents for anything except neglect, abuse and cruelty.

That said, I don’t think there is sound wisdom behind iPads at the table, which is why we don’t do it. I think children who have iPads at the table don’t learn to behave at the table, and I think eating while using screens interferes with a child’s ability to regulate their own appetite and understand hunger cues. I’d rather have the pain of dealing with a child in a restaurant now than spend years trying to undo habits which will cause problems.

But I bet there are tons of things I do that other parents don’t agree with or think are storing up problems for the future. We’re all just doing what we can and making the best choices we can manage in each situation.

I think it's better not to, I don't like how we have become somewhat reliant on it.

And I include myself in this.

I hate that sometimes it's the only option.

It just wasn't an option 10, 20 years ago and people somehow managed.

But I genuinely don't know how.

Sign of the times I guess.

So yeah, whilst I think it would be better not to, I certainly wouldn't judge. I'm in the same boat.

I would not care, or even give it any thought.
They have headphones in, so no sound intruding on other people.

'Judgy judgerpants' makes you sound a bit paranoid. Did they actually say anything?

What do they say

So how do they learn to behave and deal with the feelings when they're stressed and bored if you placate with screens?

I just hope there was no volume on the devices as that is inexcusable

Absolutely nothing to do with anyone else.

Your children, your choice.

Personally I wouldn’t use a iPad to entertain my children but that’s me and mine.

They wouldn't have known how you spent your day but should mind their own business.

Personally I'd have been grateful that your children were seated, instead of running around, and using their devices with headphones.

Ignore them, you know your children aren't getting all day screen time. Enjoy your holiday.

I don’t think you need iPads at restaurants especially if you’ve had a day filled with stimulation for them. I haven’t ever allowed mine to have screens in restaurants but I don’t judge others for it.

Pre child I might have thought negatively about it. Now I know we have to what to do what gets us through! Once they have eaten ipads are fine- don't worry about others!

Childish too. Who speaks like that in real life. Judgy judgerpants 🙄

It never happened then because iPads didn't exist. If they did, I'm sure lots of people would have done the same as op.

After an action packed day, it's nice to have a relaxing dinner and actually chat to your partner! So an iPad is ok. You've tried colouring and other things. Judgemental people are expecting 2 yr olds to act like 10 yr olds!

How old are they by the way, you've given two alternatives!

Never ok at the table no - but I don’t care what you do as long at the sound is off and I can’t see the screen. The screen flickering and jumping about is as irritating as the noise.

I think it's absolutely fine. Everyone's happy. Except for the perfect parents of MN who have perfectly behaved kids who are entertained for hours with a colouring book.

Thing is - for small children, they can’t just sit there bored.

Mine can’t anyway - they’d be trying to escape and find something interesting to do.

Slightly older children maybe, but not a toddler!

As long as they have headphones on it’s fine. Any sound - completely unacceptable